"You don't know someone's true colors until you're both in messed up situation.."
*****
Temple City, California
Annalisa Green -- September 30th, 1991 Location: 1341 Evergreen St.
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Ana's Diary 9/30/1991
I'm down in the dumps again.
I've been feeling.... empty for 48 hours. I don't know, the greatest I ever felt was helping that kid perfect his basketball skills.
It was so fun, finally not having to think about how alone I often felt.
I felt free around them. Like I could do anything.
I was still a bit baffled though. I met Michael fucking Jackson! Who wouldn't feel this way? He's a megastar.
As the time pass hanging with him at his house, that feeling went away. He was just as human as I was, and wanted to be treated that way. Michael was normal. He was regular. He was just like me, basic and old fashioned. I liked that.
And his aura was beautiful. His vibe was pure. I felt like a happy little girl around him. Maybe it was the setting — his huge amusement park, or his movie theater full of kids movies — whatever it was, I felt like a kid again.
But I knew that, that day would be be the last time I'd ever see him again. He's an artist, a celebrity. He doesn't have time for me or any other fan he 'befriends'. I don't know why, but leaving that big open space full of magic and childhood dreams made me sad.
There was never a 'fake' moment around them. My smiles were real. My laughs were pure. It just felt natural to me, there.
Now as I sit here alone in my room, I mope around in utter sadness and complete depression. I just wanted to feel like that again.
But it's wishful thinking. It was a one time thing. I could never feel like that again. I could never feel what it truly means to be happy, again.
It was great while it lasted, and I'll never forget it...
- Ana 💋
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With a soft sigh, I closed my journal and sat it back on the nightstand. I was preparing to lay back down for a nap when my door bursted open. Angel stood in the doorway with a wide smile.
