Life Ran Into Me

I just want sex from you

"Hello?" I answered the phone after about the 10th call from Spazz. "Yo where you at" he said as if he were panicking. He had every reason to panic. He was living with her once again and knew she was going to kick him out because he didn't have her back the way she thought he would. "I got her phone" I said calmy. "Who's this?" He asked. I just hung up after he asked that question. Does he not know how the mother of his kids sound? Her gay brother in law kept blowing up her phone too so I knew she told people what happened already. Unfortunately her phone had a lock on it. I tried multiple patterns before locking it. I waited until a phone call came in so I can exit from it and explore the phone. But lucky for her I just couldn't unlock it to save the world. I called Shon to tell him what happened and he flew to my rescue. "Y'all can come to my house for a little bit" he said picking Praise up out of her car seat to hold her. "Man what if I go to jail for this shit.. I just fought a pregnant woman people go to jail for attempted murder for that.. Who gone take care of my kids" I said getting a little worried. Jessey and Shon both laughed at me a little bit because they knew It wasn't going to go that far. But they assured me that If anything was ever to happened to me that they'll take care of the girls. Knowing they would be in good hands made me feel okay. As we are in Shon's car on the way to his house I get a call from Spazz. To my phone directly this time. I wasn't going to answer it but I needed him to get me and Karla's belongings out of Ashely's trunk. "Hello?" I said with an attitude. "Man what the fuck Lena you tripping" he said. I instantly snapped on him. He had me fucked up for even bringing her. "Nigga I told you not to bring her and you did anyway, you knew this shit would happen stupid ass nigga." The more I continued the more I got mad all over again. "Fuck it I don't even care can you just bring me me and my cousin stuff please" I said. "Man where you at" he said as if he didn't want to. "Im headed to Kernan". "Damn Ashely over there right now" he said laughing a little. "Kernan is long so she still could be far from me. What time you going to bring my stuff?" I asked. "I'm about to see where she at so I can go get ima call you back". We stopped by the hotel to pick up karla because Javon was with us. They had a little fling going at the moment so it was okay that she came to chill too. When we got to their house, spazz had told me that she threw all of our things out on the highway. Everything me and karla owned except our phones and what we had on was thrown away. Birth certificates, socials, ID, clothes, shoes, milk formula, diapers, etc. Karla was so upset because she didn't even have nothing to do it. Rock bottom was above us. We thought we were just chilling over there to blow off some steam but later that night Shon informed us that we could stay for a little while because his stepdad was out of town. We felt so relieved because jessey only had one bedroom and the living room was barely enough space for the 4 of us with just 2 short couches. As we stayed at Shon's house me and him would leave everyday to do something productive towards getting some kind of help. We left the babies with Karla and Javon while they stayed there "watching tv" and in their own words for having hickeys "getting stung by bees in the house. It wasn't me and Shon's business what happened whenever we left so we didn't say anything. Ms Nadia helped us get the essentials we needed to be okay. Even though I liked chilling in shon's room in his shirts and gym shorts. I didn't want to leach or be a free loader but I didn't want to leave. Everything felt okay when we were there. Like a break. But their stepdad would be home soon so Ms Nadia, Shon & Javon drove us around the city looking for a good hotel for me, karla and the girls. We ended up staying at a Red Roof motel. It was pretty decent and clean but so far away from everyone and everything. They checked on us the second night and asked if we were okay and we were honest. We told them we were a little paranoid because it was just us on a dangerous side of town with not much around. In the morning they came back to get us. The took us to a new hotel. Even though this one only had one bed instead of two, it was alot more nice. And it was just a 10 minute walk from the hotel we had to leave in the first place. We were comfortable there. I had a half of the bed and karla had the other half of the bed. Some nights sucked when my babies would throw up on my side of the bed because we could only get new sheets every three days. Shon and javon would stop by to visit sometimes to check on us and keep us company. They even invited us to Spend the 4th of July at their aunt Nene's house because they knew we'd be lonely. Ms nadia helped us with food but after a few days the money ran out and we had to spend the last few dollars on packs of noodles. Something that would last. Without no more money I had to steal bowls and forks from dollar tree. My heart was pounding when I was stealing because I feared getting caught and going to jail. I used to be able to steal the sun when I was younger. I would stuff about 40 packs of gum in my clothes from walgreens and sell it in middle school. Selling gum was my main hustle to get what I wanted but stealing for my own good was my dilemma. You name the store, I stole from it already. So I knew what I was doing for sure but the fact that I had kids changed me. That's something I promised myself I wouldn't do anymore but I had to to get us by. My auntie had found a place on the northside that was privately owned. 2 men stayed there but it was a good enough size. Everyone stayed asided of terrance and jessey. Carl would have one room, Jerry would have the other, my auntie, stacie and her baby would sleep in the back, everyone else such as me, karla, the twins, bella, her babydaddy and 2 kids would sleep in the living room. Shon bought me and the girls a queen blow up matress so we wouldn't have to sleep on the couch or the floor if the couches were already taken. It was super crowded. Karla sooner than later moved back in with verdel. I was so overwhelmed by it so as usual I would ask shon to stop by and chill with me when he got off work. He did a few times and then suddenly it turned into maybe 1 once every week or two. So I texted him one night and told him exactly what I wanted that night and he came and gave it to me. That was the very last time we had sex. I figured he found a new girlfriend. So over a few months I became sexually frustrated but didn't ask him for none. Karla sooner than later moved back in with verdel. It was the middle of September so hurricane Irma was hitting us. My babies needed juice and some new bottles so I walked a few blocks to the store to get them. On the way back it started pouring rain so I was speed walking and jogging a little bit trying to make it home. The wind picked up so much that it turned my umbrella inside out and my dress flew up. A guy in a car stopped and yelled out the window "You need a ride?" I yelled "No thank you im fine" He only offering me a ride because im cute and my dress flew up I thought. I stood under a bus stop pavilion to fix the umbrella so I wouldn't get even more soaked. Next thing I know, he's jogging up to me and says "How far you gotta go?" "Not far. My house is right around the corner" I said. And it was. Just two blocks away. He insited that he gave me a ride and grabed my umbrella and fixed it for me instantly after I've been struggling to do it. He stood about 6ft maybe 6'2 very muscular and had hazel eyes. I was thinking damn this man is beyond fine, just take the ride girl. So I gave in. He made me stay under the pavilion until he pulled his car up so I wouldn't get wet. "What's your name?" He asked me with a smooth ass deep voice. I almost told him my name was whatever he wanted it to be. "Lena" I said looking at his eyes. They were so beautiful. "You got a soft voice Lena" he said laughing. I became super shy the longer I sat in his car. He pulled up to my auntie's house and we talked for a little bit more. "I stay right down the street. On the same street, put your number in my phone and we can chill sometime" he said handing me his phone. I was hesitant because he was 24 and I was 18. But I'm used to grown men at this point hell my babydaddy was the same age. So I put my number in his phone and we were texting that same night getting to know each other more. I was falling for him because he gave me the vibes I got from henry and the looks like shon but those eyes made it even better. I hit the jackpot. While talking he mentioned he had a month old baby boy. My feelings for him went away instantly. "Why you not with the babymama?" I asked him. He said she just wasnt the one for him. At that moment I knew he wasn't shit. Any man that could put a baby in a woman and still decided he doesn't want her ain't shit. He was still so fine though and I haven't had sex in months so I told him we can just be friends with benefits. No feelings attached and anything that was too affectionate I cut it short. I didn't want him to hug me and I'll be damned if he kissed me and we would not fuck if he didn't buy a bottle. At night I would ask bella to keep an ear out on my girls while they were sleep so I could over to his house for a few. He'd come pick me up in his car with the bottle in my seat ready for me. I'd start drinking as soon as I got in. Sometimes we'd ride around the city and have fun and listen to music and other nights we'd go straight to his house. His house wasn't much but alot of black men his age didn't have their own house and I was going through the mud myself so what much could I say about him? I was super drunk and so was he but we would never have unsafe or oral sex. Because a friend with benefits was all it wasn't. He's a Cancer so you know he laid it down right. He gave it to me the best I ever had it until this very day.  That was the moment I actually felt I slept with a grown man. We would fall asleep after washing up and be right back up at 5am because he had to be at work at 6. We'd have sex one more time before he'd drop me back off at home. This went on for a good month or so. I loved it. Over time me and Eugene stopped talking because I became uninterested in sex anymore. I guess my sex drive is unsettled.
*a few months later*
Everyday I walked in the same neighborhood in circles with my baby (whichever one is awake) to get some exercise. I see a black car riding past me slowly as if he were looking for someone. He cirlcled the area twice as I was still walking and finally he stopped. "Do you know how to get onto Kings road?" He asked sticking his head out of the window and his hands still on the steering wheel. "Yeah just turn left on this street and go straight make a right and you'll be on Kings" I replied. Something told me already knew where it was because it's a popular main road and he had a GPS in his car. I knew he just wanted to talk to me. He smiled and said "Thank you. Can I take you out some time?" I never had a guy come at me like that. They always start off asking me for my name age and number. But he offered to take me out. "Yeah." I said smiling ear to ear. I got boy shy for a second. He wasn't all that good looking. Not like Eugene was. But he was sweet and had a baby face and sweet smile to top it. And his car looked good. So I gave him my number and he hit me up asking for me to be ready at 7pm. That was early for a date so I figured we wasnt going to stay out late and that he didn't want anything from me. He came a little after 7 but still pretty much on time and he was extremely flirtatious from the moment he saw me. He jumped out the car and walked to my door and opened it before I could even reach for the handle and shut it behind me. "How you doing today Ms. Lena?" Every time he said my name he'd put emphasis on it. It became annoying after while but I didnt care. He knew he was out of my league because he kept asking what made me let him take me out and if I was his type. I just wanted a good time that's all and he seemed pretty genuine. He didn't get out of line not a single time. After we arrived to the restaurant MShack Grubbin Out we talked for a long time waiting on our food. About 30 minutes after waiting the food so happened to be disgusting. So he offered to cook for me instead. So we got to go boxes and headed to his house. After passing a liquor store on the way there I told him we should drink. He wasn't a smoker or drinker but he said he would for me. We got to his house and started cooking and drinking having a blast. He was very funny but very corny. I didn't see my self hanging out with him after that night. We went to his room to watch 'Friday' while we ate. He sat on the edge of his bed while I sat on the other side in a huge chair. Halfway through the movie he realized I was in my phone alot getting bored. So he cut the movie off and we talked. This time the conversation got deep because we were both drunk. He didn't make any moves but the liquor caused me to. I asked if he had any condoms abd sure enough he did. I regretted it the very next morning because it was the worst sex in my life. I was very set on not texting him back. I blocked him from my phone and all social media.