Life Ran Into Me

Devil in disguise

" I'm 16 this is an era in my life I won't get back, have fun with it" I always thought to myself. So yes I was boy crazy. Though I was not sleeping with any of these guys, I was talkin to a guy during school, texting multiple guys for extra entertainment, talking to a guy  after school, still in love with a guy who is above any man I know until this very moment. All while crushing on this man I could only see on the weekends. He caught my attention the most.

He had nice brown skin, same color as mine to be exact. An afro with neatly shaved facial hair, an earring in both ears and he was dressed as if he were out to impress. The sexiest piece of chocolate I always wanted to lick. He had the sweetest smile with the world's most perfect teeth as he spoke to me to tell me his name was Spazz. I couldn't do much but smile back because I was so caught up in his looks. "My name is Lena" I said blushing all shy. He had a blunt in his hand every time I saw him, he looked like he was at his happiest point in life and I was very attracted to that aside of his charming looks. He had just moved in town from Miami so im thinking this guy is lit. "It was nice speaking to you but I have to go."

I lived on the other side of town; the southside,in a very beautiful home with a temporary gaurdian to go to a better school and keep focused. I was only in the ghetto for a weekend with my real family. Which I loved and enjoyed. But I enjoyed it even more knowing I was going to see him.

*2 weeks later*

No one knew I was crushing on nor talking to this man solely because he told me to keep quiet due to our ages. He knew that I was 16 and I knew that he was 22. He would look completely perverted on his end and I would look way too grown on my end. Any time either of our family members got suspicious, we'd deny it to the full extent of denial. Everyone was convinced. My oldest cousin and him were very close. They called each other bestfriend but she had a whole man so I didnt think anything of it. Me and my sister are very close but theres alot we dont tell each other. Like the fact that I was crushing on a guy 6 years older than me.

A night came upon me that me and Henry (the guy that im completely in love with) got into a bad argument and fell off. I went outside to get some fresh air and to my surprise there is Spazz. "Wussup Ma" he said giving me a sexy look. I had on a white knitted cardigan you could easily see my bra and the shortest tightest pair of shorts I had on. It was around 2 am I didnt think anyone would be up to see me on my porch. "Hey spazz what you doin up?" He kept looking at my body while trying to focus on talking to me and I was loving the attention.

"Shit just came out to smoke, you wanna hit this?" I was stressed so hell yeah I wanted to hit it! I smoked way past my limit with him to free my mind though. Mind you we had a few shots after he took me inside because he is allergic to mosquitos. We sat in the dark talking and I already knew what he was thinking because we had talked about it before. In a previous text I told him I never slept with an older guy but I wanted to. So he was taking a hint that that night was the night that I wanted to let him fuck. It was NOT my intentions to fuck him that night I just wanted a breath of fresh air and to smoke to relieve my stress.

We stepped out to the balcony in the back to finish talking because the house was freezing to me. Next thing you know he's kissing on me. He was my fucking crush I loved it so I didnt stop him from kissing me. One thing led to another and now he's touching on my body. Keeping his age in mind im starting to get uncomfortable but I led him to the point where he thinks its okay but it wasnt. I wanted him to stop so I tried to tell him "I dont want to do this yet." He looked at me with his eyes half way open and super drunk with his hands on my booty and said "Ma I just want to feel you real quick" Nigga what? We're outside. Aint no way in hell I wanted to fuck this man on a balcony. But he was high and intoxicated at the same time and I led him that far with barely any clothes on. Aint no way he was taking no for an answer.

"Spazz stop" I pushed his head away from me to stop him from kissing on me because I wanted to go back in my house. He's way stronger than me so what was that doing? Nothing. "Spazz can you please stop!" This time im pushing his chest hoping itll make a difference but no. He starts to pull his dick out and my heart is racing. Not because he's about to sex me but because I was NOT ready for a MAN to sex me. I thought it would be beyond painful. I was high and intoxicated also so my defense was poor. He slides in me and the position we were in it was hard for me to move. We're fucking on the balcony. When we got done he repeated his self "I just wanted to feel you ma, that shit tight." A million things ran through my mind as I couldn't say nothing nor piece reality together.

"What just happened? Was I raped? I didnt fight him off to the full extent so was it just rough sex? What is he thinking?" He asked me if I was okay and I said "yeah im about to go shower and go to sleep" he laughed a little and said okay he'll walk me to my door and he did. He kissed my forehead and aside of what just happened I thought that part was pretty cute I still had a huge crush on this man. "Goodnight Spazz" I smiled and closed the door. Inside I still did not know how to feel.