Life Ran Into Me

Daddy you gotta go too

As soon as I got the news I clocked out. I knew it wasn't something I should have done but there was no telling what he took. 2 hours on the bus what's irritating me so much because I thought that he probably made a second trip back but my dad was not answering the phone. He barely knew how to work it. As soon as I got home I seen that he took well I told him not to take. Anything I bought. He took all of the blankets and sheets and pillows the clothes that I bought him and a lot of my belongings that would be useful for him. I texted him and ask why did he come back to my house after the police told him it will be trespassing. He said that he just needed to grab some more things and that he had his brothers TV still in there and that was the last thing he was going to come back to get. I instantly call the cops to let them know that he came back to my house. I had the text messages to prove it as well. The One Cop who was helping me showed up by herself. " I knew he would come back his body language told me that he would" she said shaking her head. She called him on my phone to speak with him and confront him about coming back to my house. She was not able to arrest him for trespassing because she did not catch him on my property even though he admitted it she has to physically see that he was there in order to arrest him. As they were on the phone she kept making it very clear that he was not supposed to come back to my house and that she will be on standby. Randy group furious with her the more she was talkin. "Do I make myself clear?!" She yelled at him on the phone. "Fuck you bitch!" He yelled back at her and hung up. "Im sorry that you even have to deal with that she said" handing me a report. It was a report for domestic violence showing that I had a case open for it. "I will be very close by. Just call 911 as soon as you see him. Do not hesitate." She said getting in her car. It seemed that she started to take this personal. She wanted to take him to jail. After calling her a bitch I wouldn't have been surprised if she was hiding in the bushes waiting to catch him.
I felt paranoid for a few days thinking he would break into my house and beat my ass. My dad is a 57 year old 5'3 130 pound man who's drunk 90% of the day so there isn't much he would be able to do for me. I didn't feel safe anymore. So I took my domestic violence report and requested that they transfer me as soon as possible. Within the same visit I got put on probabtion basically stating that I would be evicted if anyone else lived in my house within a year. It sucked because my dad still lived with me. He had absolutely no where to go and he's my baby sitter. If he couldn't stay there I would have no job. I was skating on very thin ice but I kept him there. I didn't have a choice. I had bills that needed to be paid.
*a week later*
I got paid. I didn't get paid as much as usual because I missed work alot lately but I got paid a good amount. I left my dad a $50 bill on the stove with a note that said "for dad" next to a $10 bill that had a note that said "for deja star". She's my neice. She stayed the night because she wanted to help my dad take the girls to the fair the next morning. I left this money on the stove while everyone was sleeping.
It's 4 am now, I've been on the phone with Henry all night caked up and laughing. "We need to video chat" he suggested. We've never done it before after 5 years. I was shy, it took me a while to get used to it but eventually I did. Seeing each other for the first time caused us to not go to sleep at all.  So I was wide awake when my niece came in my room at 6am to say good morning. "Goodmorning Star. Did you get the money I left for you?" I asked. "What money?" She was completely lost. I left you $10 on the stove next to my daddy's money. Something clicked automatically. My dad is always up before everyone...the money was missing... He took my niece's money! I was so upset because I left him money of his own and a note to specify it was not his money. Around 7:30am my dad comes back in the house pissy drunk. "Daddy you took deja's money I left for her?" I asked knowing he did. "What money? The money on the stove? I thought that was for me daughter." He said innocently. I knew he took it on purpose though. "How you thought it was for you when the note under it said in bold letters it was for her?" I said catching him in his lie. He became annoyed getting caught up in his lie amd teied to change the subject. "Are you going to work today daughter?" He asked walking unbalanced to the couch. "I was gonna go but I can't now becauss you're too drunk for me to even leave my kids with you" I said. I grew irritated. Because the more he began to drink, the more I couldn't stand him. He was turning back to his old ways and I knew that wasn't good or sage for me or my girls. "Daughter im drunk every I can handle the girls don't worry just go to work" he said slurring his words with his hands out to the side. (🤷🏾). I knew I couldn't trust what he said. Last time he got pissy drunk babysitting while I was at work he blacked out on the couch. He was asleep while all three babies were awake because they were covered in shit. Shit on the walls, floors, in their hair, furniture, everywhere and he didn't know a thing. His defense was somebody came into the house and did it. Randy snitched on him with pictures and cleaned it up but my dad said he was trying to sabotage me and his relationship. Even if that was the case I was mad because he was too drunk to even be sure of what happend. So there was no way I was going to let him take my toddlers to a fair while he was drunk like that. "I knew I shouldn't have given you the money until I got home." I said. He was offended. "Watch your mouth" he said as his eyes got big. His eyes getting big was a warning for violence. "I just need you to give my niece back her $10 please" I summed up the conversation. "Daughter I don't have $10" he argued. "So at 6am you have $60 but by 7:30am you're broke? What did you buy?!" I asked yelling at him. "Lower your voice" he said in a deep voice raising his. "No because you took my niece's money after I just paid you. That was for her to have fun with and you want to be money greedy all of a sudden!" I said growing angry. "It's about time you paid me more anyway got damnit!" He yelled in my face spit was flying out of his mouth. "I shouldn't have to pay you at all! You've been living in my house for free for almost a year now!" I let go of the truth. "I don't have to stay here im only here to help yo ass out" he said as he began to chug his beer. "This is besides the point I don't even want to talk to you right now. Just give my niece back her money" I said as I picked up my phone to still see Henry on video chat. I was embarrassed he had to hear us argue but I was also happy because I knew that seeing his face would instantly calm me down and talking to him would make me forget about the situation until further notice. I sat upstairs minding my business talking with Henry for a good 15 minutes before he called me downstairs. "Yes?" I said with a heavy attitude. "Daughter come here I need you" he pleaded oit as if he was hurt or something. When I got down stairs he handed me the girls cup. "Daughter I can't fix that.. I know you can." He said sipping his beer. He reeked of homelessness and beer so every time he got close I backed up. "So you're mad at me now" he said getting sentimental. "No you just smell" I said casually knowing it might hurt his feelings. "Whatever Daughter" he quickly changed up his attitude. "I want to take the girls out today those are my kids too" he added. He tried to hug me. "Daddy I don't want to huh you right now I said pushing him off of me almost dropping my phone. "Fine. Act stuck up if you want to I don't fuckin care" he nagged. "That's all you wanted me to come downstairs for. You didn't need help you just wanted to argue with me" I said irritated. "No I just wanted to talk to you" I rolled my eyes and started walking upstairs. "Lena get down here I wasn't done talking to you!" He demanded yealling to the top of his lungs. "This is my house! Im grown!" I yelled at him. I'll be damned if I went through everything I went through, had kids, paid bills and listened to my dad tell me to get back downstairs because he wasn't done pissing me off. I slammed the door behind me trying to focus on Henry. "You want me to call you back?" He asked offering me privacy. "No I'm good. My dad just aggravating me, he drunk." I said. Having Henry hang up was the last thing I wanted. I never liked for him to go. Even for a second. I was truly obsessed and in love. My dad woke my kids up. April came upstairs running in and out while Praise and Deja stayed downstairs. So I left my door open. "I didn't have to do none of this shit for you" he said loud enough so I can hear it. "I only stuck around to help your ungrateful ass and this is how you treat me."  I couldn't hold back any longer. "Fuck that I didn't need you! I can take care of myself! I been taking care of my self since I was a kid! I been on my own since I was 17 I don't need nobody! I wouldn't even been in this mess if you would've done your job as a job in the first place! But no you chose alcohol and my my stupid ass mam chose drugs over me!" I was getting off topic but I was just letting my emotions fall out of my heart finally. My whole life as far back as I could remember I've always been upset with mya parents for not working it out and secondly for not trying hard enough for me and my sister. I was 8 months old and my sister was 2 when we finally got out of foster care and moved in with my auntie who acted like she cared about us. She took care of us but it never felt like it for me. I had to steal things I needed and wanted I got mistreated and neglected and worst of all I got beat growing up. I was treated horribly and never knew why. All I knew was him and my mom was never around to save me and when he did come around he would often contribute to the violence over any little thing. Whenever we were on good terms it was him filling up bad things about my mom in my head saying "she did this to us". I would see my mom about one or twice a year. Maybe 3 times on a good year and when I seen here she was high and putting the blame on my dad. I had no safe place. I only had jessey. So I was damned to let him sit in my face years later now that im grown and talk to me that way and out me through anything. "People always want me to get out of character and when I do im the bad person! Get all of your stuff and leave!" I felt my skin boiling. He hit a different level of anger that even Randy couldn't hit. "Fuck it Im gone" he said as he slammed the door. I watched him leave from my window. I was so hurt because I love him and he's once again let alcohol ruin our relationship. I knew I was going to miss him.