internet idiots

Scary Niccolo [chapter 48]

"So y/n, was it?" Grisha asked, "How long have you and Eren been dating?"

Your head looked up from your phone after hearing your name being called, "Honestly, I don't even remember what I had for breakfast this morning."

"Disappointed but not surprised," Eren sighed.

Carla and Niccolo were working in the kitchen to start preparing dinner. Now normally, pizza or dino nuggets would satisfy everyone's appetites, but since there were guests over some people wanted to look responsible. So you were getting a special dinner that would normally only be prepared on special occasions. While the milf and blonde were working in the kitchen, you were getting drilled with questions by Eren's dad.

"Dummy," Sasha scolded, flicking a green bean at you since you were sitting at the counter which served as a divider in a sense from the kitchen and living room.

You flinched from the sudden contact of the vegetable to your forehead, "I hope you know that your mom is a hoe."

"Well your dad's a man slut," Marco piped up, sliding into the seat next to you.

"Not gonna argue with that. I only really tolerate him because he buys my love," you hummed.

"That's," Zeke started, "Kind of sad..."

"Don't have daddy issues for no reason," you replied, shooting him with the bi finger guns. I mean like winking and clicking your tongue, the whole package.

"So how did you and my son start dating in the first place?" Grisha asked, adjusting his glasses so they weren't falling off his nose like they previously were.

"Funny story actually!" you chirped, "So we were at the pool, right? And Eren got—"

Eren's eyes widened as his hand shot to your mouth before you could divulge any secrets, "Why don't you go help mom and Nicco with dinner, yeah? Leave the question answering to me."

"But I wanted to answer that question," you grumbled with a small pout, lazily starting to make your way around the counter to the kitchen. You eyes lit up and your pace quickened once you remember something, "But I'll gladly go where the knives are kept!"

"Don't forget open fires!" Armin added from the living room.

"You're still as freaky as ever," Zeke narrowed his eyes at one of Eren's childhood friends.

"And you're still as ugly as ever. Your point?" Armin retorted immediately, his eyes widening as he covered his mouth, seeming to not have expected any of that to come out of his mouth.

"Ymir, y/n, and Marco are clearly influencing your train of thought," Annie sighed.

"Serves him right!" Marco called from the kitchen, starting to help after he saw Eren send you in.

"Y/n, if you continue to cut the vegetables like that then you're getting to chop your fucking fingers off," Niccolo informed, visibly stressed as he had to monitor the food, you, Sasha, and Marco.

"Ah hecker doodles," Sasha cursed, putting her finger to her mouth as she tried to suck the blood off. She had just done the opposite of what Niccolo told you to do, resulting in her getting a minor cut on the finger.

"Carla, can you please watch that?" Niccolo asked, pointing towards a pot as he made his way to his fiancé.

"Sure thing," she answered, switching from whatever she was doing to watching the pot.

"STOP YOU OLD WENCH!" Marco shouted, pointing his knife at you while glaring.

"You threw the fucking water first!" you shouted in retaliation, pointing your knife at him on return.

Niccolo's eye twitched, the blonde trying his hardest to be gentle with Sasha while he wrapped a Mickey Mouse bandaid around her finger. He gave it a kiss before turning around to you and Marco who were still fighting.

"OUT OF MY DAMN KITCHEN! NOW!" Niccolo yelled, his face starting to get red with anger as he pointed for the two of you to get out.

"Sir, yes sir," Marco said immediately, putting down the utensil and silently leaving the kitchen.

"I've never seen him that mad before," you whispered to Marco as the two of you stalked away to the living room.

"You made Nicco mad!" Ymir laughed.

"You don't understand," you shuddered while the horror of his angered face played in your mind, "I thought I was going to loose my life. I was scared."

"That's actually a lot coming from you," Mikasa whistled.

"Especially when you look death in the face and start laughing," Aero added on.

"I'm never making Niccolo mad again," Marco sighed, falling down on Jean who had his arms open for him.

"Do you think he would yell at me?" Historia hummed.

"Sweetie, none of us are cruel enough to yell at you," Jean answered, "And we have Marco and y/n here."

"No, I have yelled at Historia before, but it was in a joking manner. I don't think she's ever made me mad enough to actually yell at her though," you murmured.

"I want to be yelled at," Historia challenged.

"Make me mad enough," you retorted.

"Sasha wasn't the one who broke your lego set, I was," Historia lied.

Your head shot towards her, your once calm demeanor changing immediately to that of rage. Your eyes twitched as you slowly started standing up. Everyone watched you with caution, Ymir ready to stop you if you tried to lay a finger on the blonde sitting next to her.

"You what?" you hissed.

"I don't think this will end well..." Zeke shook his head with widened eyes, seeming to sense the danger Historia might be in.

"I broke it," she replied simply.

"LISTEN UP YOU DUMB BLONDE BIMBO!" you started yelling, Eren and Grisha turning around at the counter so they were looking at you, startled by the sudden increase in volume, "That lego set took 5 hours to build! Five fucking hours of my life, all of it going to waist because your stupid ass broke it! I'm telling you now, from here on out, your life will be a living hell! For as long as I live, I will wreak hell on you and your family!"

"Woah, woah, woah," Eren wrapped his arms around your waist and put his chin on your shoulder, "What happened here?"

It was obvious Eren was trying to calm you, his eyes following your crazed ones to Historia's figure. She looked slightly frightened, tears seeming to start to form as the blonde's eyes looked slightly more glossy.

"She broke my lego set," you growled, starting to squirm in Eren's arms.

"No, that was Sasha," Eren corrected.

"She admitted to doing it," you retorted, voice still laced with anger.

"Y/n, darling, I literally walked in on Sasha smashing the thing to pieces. We've went over this a week ago when you found out," Eren's grip around your waist getting firmer.

"But she just said she did," you answered, brows furrowed lightly in confusion as you started to calm down.

"I lied. I wanted to get yelled at," Historia piped up, "I now know I don't like getting yelled at..."

"Well son of a caterpillar eating a moose," you snapped your fingers while using a country accent, your mood seeming to do a full 180, "Sorry Historia. I promise I didn't mean any of the things I said... mostly."

"That's the best apology you're going to get out of her," Eren informed Historia, sending her and apologetic look.

"I thought so," Historia mumbled, "Sorry for lying."

"Tis all good," you waved her off.

"Dinner's almost ready!"

"Great, thanks!"