Rex: So, care to explain to us how exactly this happened?
Hardcase: No.
Jesse: I'm good.
Fives: Why are you looking at me for???
Rex: Because you always have something to do with all the trouble around here.
Fives: What? Am I the one who filled Dogma's shoes with jelly?
Kix: Yes. I saw you on the security camera
Fives: Dang. I didn't think anyone knew about that
Rex: Someone gonna tell us what happened?
Hardcase: I slipped on butter and fell out the window into a trashcan where a racoon bit me and so then I ducktaped my eye.
Kix: What does that even mean???
Jesse: Its true. It's what happened
Rex: CT-5555!
Jesse: Oooh you know you're in trouble when he uses your full name
Fives: Okay! I admit, it was my idea to cover the floor with butter so we could slide across it! But it's not my fault Hardcase fell out the window!
Rex: And the racoon?
Fives: I, might have been trying to keep one as a pet
Rex: -Sighs-
Kix: Well, Hardcase has a broken arm and a sprained leg. Even in a bacta tank its gonna take him a week or two to recover
Jesse: What if we feed him pinto beans?
Kix: What?
Jesse: You know, pinto beans, as in the magical beans that can heal you?
Kix:
Jesse:
Rex:
Jesse: Did you seriously make that up just to make me eat my pinto beans Rex???
Rex: ....It worked?
Kix: Okay, well, let's give Hardcase some rest- HEY!!! DON'T TOUCH MY HAIR JELL!!!
Hardcase: But I want my head to look shiny!!!
Kix: NO, NO, STOP
Jesse: Why is he so protective of that?
Rex: I don't wanna know
Fives: Well, I'm gonna go, uh, breakdance on the roof
Rex: Not so fast. You're in trouble for covering the floor with butter, and trying to keep a wild animal as a pet, and a whole bunch of other things
Jesse: Oh, don't forget about the pizza he clogged down the toilet
Fives: Shhhh!!!
Rex: Come on. Let's leave Hardcase alone
Hardcase: But I wanna blow bubbles! And smash poptarts on a trampoline!
Jesse: I would question if he's entirely sane, but he's always like this.
Fives: Byeeee!!!!
Hardcase: So what do I do now Kix
Kix: Lay down and take a nap
Hardcase: Can I have a capri sun?
Kix: No
Hardcase: Can I play with the fish in that tank?
Kix: No
Hardcase: Can I wack you with a pool noodle?
Kix: What? No!
YOU ARE READING
Hilarious Texts And Tales Of The Clone Wars
FanfictionFunny-no, hilarious text and tales if the Clone Wars characters had phones, and a crazy life outside of the war. Don't take anything serious, because this is pure goofiness. Warning: this will probably be the craziest thing you've ever read. ***If...
