Chapter 51

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Continue flashback The next day I spent it at the house still

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The next day I spent it at the house still. Emmett and Rose came back for most of the day to get away from Edward and Bella again. I guess she has been whining and complaining about needing to be turned and all this other shit. So that's why they came over.
We did not do much other than just take the easy day again.

Of course Emmett and I played some video games together while Rose did some reading.

It is now day three of Payton still being asleep and I am trying not to worry. As I am sitting in the living room, I see Loki come into the house. I have some off feeling towards him but I can't say much since I pushed her away. I told her to move on the day I left. Plus he is with Leah now so I don't have to worry too much.

"She still asleep?"  He asked.

I nod my head. "Yeah she is. From what I can feel she doesn't feel as tired so maybe she will wake up soon. I am not sure." I say with a sigh.

"Well hopefully she does wake up soon. I miss my best friend." He says.

"Yeah. I never got a chance to thank you for taking care of her since I left." I tell him.

"Oh I did not do it for you. I did it for her. If it wasn't for me being there and being stubborn she would have died."

When he said that word "died" my dead heart clenched. I instantly started feeling bad again for what I did.

"I know" I said softly.

"Do you love her?" He asked me. This was the third time I have been asked this question.

"Yes more than anything." I said.

"Then why didn't you fight for her? Why did you let someone else make a decision for you that cost you your relationship, to where she almost died twice, actually died once, had to face your bitch of an ex, and now is basically in a sleep coma because her body crashed from everything it has been through. If you love her like you say you do then WHY. DID. YOU. LEAVE." He asked yelling making me flinch a little.

I did not say anything for a minute. "You may not believe me, but I honestly thought I did what was right. I thought if I was away I would not hurt her like I almost did with Bella over a damn paper cut. But as soon as I watched her walk away that night I instantly regretted what I did.  And I knew she wouldn't want me back. Especially after what I said. If I am being honest I do not blame her either, and I am just lucky enough that she actually talked to me 3 days ago and is willing to try and work on the relationship. Even if I do not deserve her, because I know I don't." I say whispering out the last part.

"You are an asshole for what you did to her. And you are right, you do not deserve her. Yet, here she is, after all this time, and is still in love with you. You were the first person she fully opened up to in all areas of her life. Willingly. And you took that for granted. Be lucky she did not reject you like I did to Edward. Be thankful, that she still loves you so much, it hurt to even think about rejecting you, so she just went through the pain silently hoping one day you would come back to her. I will only say this to you once, DO. NOT. BREAK. HER. HEART. AGAIN. Or I will torture you like she did Maria and kill you." Loki says to me.

"Yeah totally fine by me. If I ever hurt her again, I do not think I will want to live anymore." I say.

"Well then good. Glad we got that out of the way. Take care of her, love her, and cherish her, always."

"I'm never letting her go again." I tell him.

We continued to talk for a little bit longer until he had to go back to the Rez. I started missing Payton more the longer she was asleep. I missed her the way her eyes sparkled, her laugh, her smile, and so much more. I just wanted her back awake here with me.

I spent the rest of the day laying next to her just holding her close. From time to time she would cuddle closer to me and I couldn't help but smile every time she did.

Flash back over.

"So yeah, that's what happened over the last three days you've been asleep." I tell her.

"Im so sorry I made you worry." She says.

"Hey, it's fine. It isn't your fault. Plus you are awake now and that's what matters to me." I say to her.

"Im also sorry about the guys. They are just protective." Payton says.

"Darlin' I understanding. I broke your heart and they just wanna make sure I'm not gonna hurt you again. I totally get where they are coming from. Don't be mad at them for wanting to protect you."

"Um does it bother you that I am still close with Loki after what happened?" She says nervously.

I look over at her and see worry in her eyes. "At first when I found out I wasn't happy. But you were right in saying I have no say in it. Payton I pushed you away, I told you to move on, and other hurtful things. So I don't blame you for trying to move on okay? All I need to know is from here on out is it just the two of us? No worries about anyone getting in between us. Is it just you and me?" I ask.

"Of course it is. I didn't want to move on Jasper. But I tried and every time I did something it felt like I was cheating on you. I just couldn't go through with it but then that drunk night that all came crashing down. I woke up the next morning scared because I didn't know how I'd tell you if you ever came back. But now you know. And you need to know that I have no lingering feelings. All I have is my love for you cowboy." She says softly.

"Good" I say while picking up her hand and kissing it. We continued to drive until we got to our destination.

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