The son of Harry Styles {EN}

Chapter 4

CLAIRE

After an hour we finally got home. I'm stressing so hard. I don't want to be pregnant. I'm only 19 years old. I'm going to start studying. I'm going to be an engineer. Making and building things; bridges, buildings, houses,... Anything but raising a child. Why does that have to happen now, why not when I graduated? What about the man I love? But no, it had to happen now with Harry. I really don't know what to do? I already know I have my mother; she'll never leave me alone. She was in the same situation; it was even worse. Grandma was very angry at first. Mom was sent out of the house. She had to stay with one of her friends, but they couldn't be there forever for her. It wasn't until three months later that my grandmother asked her for forgiveness, and they've never left each other since. She was always there for mom. She was so sorry she got so mad at mom.

I don't know who my father is. Mom and Dad were in a year-long relationship. When my mother said she was pregnant with me, and she told her she didn't want to get a abortion, he got mad at her and left her. No one's ever heard of him. No one knows why he was so angry. It wasn't just my mother's fault. No wait, it's nobody's fault.

I went to the bathroom and locked the door. I just wanted to be alone right now. We bought five tests just in case. I quickly pee on all 5 tests and wait now. I'm listening to music in the meantime.

Coming out of my cage

And I've been doing just fine

Gotta gotta be down

Because I want it all

It started out with a kiss

How did it end up like this

It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss

Now I'm falling asleep

And she's calling a cab

While he's having a smoke

And she's taking a drag

Now they're going to bed

And my stomach is sick

And it's all in my head

But she's touching his chest

Now, he takes off her dress

Now, let me go

I just can't look its killing me

And taking control

Jealousy, turning saints into the sea

Swimming through sick lullabies

Choking on your alibis

But it's just the price I pay

Destiny is calling me

Open up my eager eyes

Cause I'm Mr Brightside

I'm coming out of my cage

And I've been doing just fine

Gotta gotta be down

Because I want it all

It started out with a kiss

How did it end up like this

It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss

Now I'm falling asleep

And she's calling a cab

While he's having a smoke

And she's taking a drag

Now they're going to bed

And my stomach is sick

And it's all in my head

But she's touching his chest

Now, he takes off her dress

Now, let me go

'Cause I just can't look its killing me

And taking control

Jealousy, turning saints into the sea

Swimming through sick lullabies

Choking on your alibi

But it's just the price I pay

Destiny is calling me

Open up my eager eyes

'Cause I'm Mr Brightside

I never

I never

I never

I never

I'm jumping around here and dancing. I love The Killers so much! I could really listen to it for hours. Especially Mr. Brightside. For a moment, I forget why I'm here, until suddenly my alarm goes off. Shit. The five minutes are up. I'll take the tests. I'm afraid to watch. Those five things will define my life. Not literally, of course, but still. Okay, here we go.

Fuck.

Test 1: Positive

Fuck.

Test 2: Positive

Fuck.

Test 3: positive

Yes, leave the rest. It's obvious. I'm pregnant. I should be happy, but I'm not. I'm 19, single and pregnant. I went to school next month. I went to college, learning things, and now I'm pregnant.

"MAMA!" I'm really freaking out right now. Mom's running to the bathroom, but she's not coming in. Just the door was locked. I quickly open it and fly into her arms as I start crying. "Shhh, it's going to be okay. You're not alone. You have me and Grandma and Sara and Robin. It's going to be okay. Your child will be happy, and so will you. You'll have a bright future. Look at me. I'm happy too and I was even younger." " 1 year, mom, 1 year younger. That doesn't matter much." I say shockingly and snivelling. However, she is right. I'm not alone. And she did it, too. She's successful in what she does. She has her own store. She sells clothes her best friend designs. It's been hugely successful. And I had a happy childhood. I didn't miss anything, not even my father.

In the meantime, I'm watching Friends. After a while, Sara and Robin are at my house. After I finally calmed down, I called them. They need to know I'm pregnant. Like my mother, I need them with me now.

"Hey, what's wrong? It sounded urgent." Sara jumps into the seat next to me. Robin sits on the backrest. "I have to tell you something important. You know the last night in Paris?" "We remember everything, but you?" Sara and Robin are starting to laugh. "Ok ok ha-ha, I know, but now come seriously. So I did have sex, but now I am... pregnant." They both look at me with big eyes. "Do you mean that? Pregnant with that guy?" "Yes, no from another. Sure of him. Who else? I don't remember anything about that one night because I didn't touch anyone if I didn't get anything, and now you think I'm sleeping with everybody?" "Wooow, I didn't mean that, I put my emphasis on pregnant. Of course I know it's from that one guy when it was. And I do know you're not like that." "Sorry, probably the hormones." We're all starting to laugh.

"What are you going to do now? Study?" We've been talking about my pregnancy for a few hours. I told them I'm going to keep it, my mom's going to help me, and they've said they're going to help me, too. I'm so lucky with friends like that. They also asked what I'm going to do next. "Hmm, I'm probably going to stop my studies first. I want to put everything in order first and i can't do that until the child is there, but after that I'll probably study if I can."

"Oh, it's late, I have to go and you, Robin, probably too. It's been 2 hours." says Sara. "Yes, we'll go again. Sleep though, Claire." "Sleep wel" I give them both a big hug. When they're gone, I go to my bed. As exhausting as I am, I can't sleep. I can't stop thinking about my child. How will that go? Is he going to be hard? Or she? What do I want, a girl or a boy? What name? And the nursery; What will that look like? What about the clothes?

I panic a little, but somehow I'm happy with the pregnancy. I couldn't miss it anymore.