The Adventures of Doctor Abby Normal, The Basement Diaries

Stealing Hitler, Part 4

"Hitler?" Said Hulkling, "we will be heroes." Wiccan and Speed were telling each other to stop hitting themselves.

"It's so secret even the Avengers don't know about it," said Cassandra, "if we help SHIELD pull this off we'll be taken so seriously." Wiccan and Speed stopped telling each other to stop hitting themselves.

"We're already taken seriously," said Patriot.

"But Hitler," said Cassandra.

"Did SHIELD ask for our help?" Asked Miss America.

"You can never be too careful with Hitler," said Marvel Boy. Prodigy agreed.

"What's the plan?" Asked Kate Bishop Hawkeye.

At the Hydra Base

"Do you store things in this storage room?" Asked Abby, it was labeled storage room.

"How observant, we do, we also have a special storage room, but we're not supposed to show that to people we can't trust," said the Human Resources Representative.

"You can trust me," said Abby.

"Okay," said the, main character super-powers.

"Ow," said Abby as the tugging started intensifying. She felt something crawling down her face.

"What dumb luck," whispered Cassandra in her ear, "but it's good that we did our homework just in case." The government would be so proud of them, everything was going to plan.

"What are you-"

"Helping, say hello Hulking." Cassandra had the world's smallest walkie talkie.

"HELLO!" Wiccan wiggled his fingers from behind a column, Abby also saw a blur.

"A Pisces," said the Human Resources Representative, "What are you?"

"An Aquarius," said Abby.

"Hulking is Capricorn!" Said Hulkling over the walkie talkie. Patriot, Miss America, Marvel Boy, and Prodigy were also present.

"Here we are at the special storage room," said the Human Resources Representative.

"Oh no," said Abby.

"Oh, no is right, he did not die in Berlin," said the Human Resources Representative as a Cryogenically preserved Hitler was revealed.

"Isn't he beautiful, the Fuhrer is magnificent."

"Yes, he, can I have a few moments alone to marvel at the Fuhrer and grovel at his-"

"We don't trust you that much," Abby's main character super-powers stopped working. "On a scale of 1 to 10 how interested are you in employment at, ow!" Speed ran by and punched him in the face, knocking him out.

"Shrink him down before the alarm sounds!" Said Cassandra as she grew to normal size to guard the door.

Abby broke the glass of the pod and shrunk Hitler. "Oh no, it's the Young Avengers!"

"What do you mean, of course-" got out Cassandra before Abby sounded the alarm.

"The Fuhrer is missing, the fuhrer is, this is all part of their plan!" Such distractions like this were truly serendipitous.

"Sir," said Maria Hill, "activity has been detected at the Hydra Poconos base."

"Could it be connected?" Thought Nick Fury.

At the Avengers Mansion...

"If you like Pina Coladas, getting kidnapped in Afghanistan, if you like making love and to fight," Tony stopped singing his real theme song when the alarm went off.

"Hyrdra detected," the coordinates popped up, "the Young Avengers-"

"How did everyone who wasn't Speed get there so fast?" Asked Tony.

"You have the same problem after one too many," the alarm was, seriously though, Hydra.

"The Fuhrer is missing!" Communications started to be intercepted. "Miss Klum-"

"It's the Young Avengers!" Shouted Abby, they were now aware that this "betrayal" was a part of the plan.

Tony pressed the button. "Avengers assemble!"

"The Avengers are assembling," said Maria Hill.

"So are we," said Nick Fury as the Helicarrier was directed towards the Poconos.

Abby ran down the hall, trying not to drop Hitler, she probably should have brought a Ziploc baggie or something. She was fumbling around for the directions back to New York, which were actually a lot of work and this chapter was already delayed enough.

Just as Abby reached the still unlocked door to the parking lot, using her now reactivated Main Character Super-Powers she was stopped by Quicksilver.

"Hydra Scum," he said, "where are they?"

"I was just here for an interview, don't tell my boss," who isn't Norman Osborn, Abby should have said not out loud.

"Oscorp scum!"

"That's fair, hey, I heard that Crystal misses you and wants you and Luna and her to be a family again," said Abby.

"She got remarried," he retorted.

"They're separated," said Abby.

"How did you-" Abby shrunk Quicksilver.

"Haha," said Abby before she realized she hadn't turned the safety back on. "Oh no," said a tiny Abby as Quicksilver started chasing her.

"Pietro, where are you?' Asked Wanda as she burst in.

"Down here!" Said a squeaky voice.

"Pietro?"

"I'm down here, it's Oscorp, Oscorp is, ow." Abby threw Hitler at Quicksilver. "Where are you?" Demanded Quicksilver.

"What are the Avengers doing here?" Demanded Cassandra, "Quicksilver, why are you-"

"Oh, there he is." Said Wanda

"Oscorp!"

"No, it's Pym-" explained Cassandra.

"Oscorp is, ow!" Abby jumped on him, biting him and putting her fingers in his eyes.

"That's mine!" Said Abby as she grabbed Hitler and ran off.

"You don't know about the plan?" Asked Cassandra.

"No, what plan?" Asked a now magically resized Quicksilver.

"Is Captain America here?" Asked Cassandra, she had to be very careful.

Abby resized herself behind a potted plant.

"Pew, pew, pew," said Clint Barton Hawkeye as he passed by.

"Shew, a useless one," said Abby as she crawled serpentine like towards a window. Hitler was sticking out of her pocket, she had to-

"Put, Hitler, Back," said Jarel.

"I saved him from the Young Avengers, where do you think I was-"

"The special storage room is not towards the window," Jarel was right.

"I know, but if I jump out the window, then re-enter through the window to the special storage room," there was no window in the special storage room. "He isn't safe here anymore!"

"I doubt that you love the Fuhrer," said Jarel.

"I do too, but, I know a better place for him, the most trustworthy place in the world."

"Anywhere but Oscorp?" Asked Jarel.

"Nervous laughter," said Abby.

"Oscorp is involved in this, this is also not-" a shield hit Jarel in the face.

"Are you okay Ma'am?" Asked Captain America.

"Yes, I am, he was just, sexual harassment." Said Abby.

"That's no way to treat a lady," said Captain America as he pointed to the best direction to run.

"Thank you proud Gryffindor!" Said Abby the Slytherin as she escaped with Hitler.