Hermitcraft Incorrect Quotes

73

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Cub: Biff, do you know how long it takes until you start hallucinating from sleep deprivation?

Biffa: I think-

Mumbo: Seventy-two hours.

Biffa: ...How do you-

Mumbo, staring into empty space over the rim of his coffee cup: There's a clown behind you.

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Tango: Okay, so right here, it states that you're creative.

Zed: Yes

Tango: Okay... may I know what you create?

Zed: Drama.

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False: Okay, mission number two: finding where the popcorn is.

Bdubs: Wait, what was mission number one?

False: Fucking getting here, dickhead.

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Jevin: I'm babysitting my nephew today and as his dad was leaving, he said, "Be good today" and the kid responded by saying "Dad, I will punch you in the leg."

Jevin: He's gonna regret asking me to babysit.

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True: It's not the destination that matters. It's the huge amount of enemies you made along the way.

Tfc: You're going to jail.

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Stress: Why is Wels crying? 

xB: They saw a leaf on the sidewalk and- 

Wels: IT LOOKED SO CRUNCHY! 

Stress: Please don't say what I think you're gonna say- 

Wels: AND WHEN I STEPPED ON IT THERE WAS NO CRUNCH! 

Stress: NO, NOT THAT!

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Ex: I had a crush on someone once and I didn't know how to handle it so I filled their car with heart-shaped confetti.

Doc: Wow.

NPG: That's so funny! I went to my car ages ago and I found it filled with heart-shaped confetti!

Doc: ...

Ex: How fun! I have to go water my dog now.

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Beef: Your existence is confusing to me.

Iskall: How so?

Beef: Your presence is annoying, but the mere thought of anything bad happening to you upsets me.

Joe: That's called enemies to lovers.

Iskall: So that means you like me?

Beef: No.

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X: There are three ways to resolve conflict.

Hels: Gun

Keralis: Knife

Pearl: Blackmail

X: Why the fuck do I even bother?

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Grian: Wow.. he really hates us.

Scar: Maybe he's homophobic?

Grian: We're not a couple, Scar.

Scar: We're not?

Impulse: You're not?

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Gem: Do you think Cleo likes me?

Hypno: Likes you as a friend or likes you as in this is going to be the longest conversation of my life?

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Therapist: On a scale from 1-10, rate your pain.

Cleo: pi, a minimal but a never ending number.

Therapist: What the actual f*ck.

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Ren: Etho, we're sorry.

Etho: I'm starting to think 'Etho, we're sorry' is my actual name. Because of how often you all say it to me.

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Stress: You're going to have to forgive False, she's very temperamental.

BadTimes: Yeah, half temper, half mental.

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Mumbo: I would stab you right now but, unfortunately my values said no

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X: Hmm, have I ever let a Hermit off the hook for favouritism?

*flashback*

Grian and Pearl: *carrying loads of books on summoning*

X: What are all these books for?

Grian and Pearl:

Grian and Pearl: Throwing them at Big Eyes?

*end flashback*

X: No.. I don't think I have.

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Tfc: [tries to create a sense of calm by lighting incense only to find out that the sticks were actually sparklers]

Tfc: This is painfully on-brand actually.

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Today's Question:

What do y'all think you know about the au I use for this book?

I hope you enjoyed today's chapter, until the next one, bye! ~Mors