Akatsuki Oneshots (Based on A Taster of Modern Living and Akatsuki's Shadow)

Requested: Did we just -

Kisame and Itachi were teaching you a few defensive moves for safety reasons. These two were quite protective of you in your world and wanted to make sure you were safe when they weren't around. "Let me teach her how to double disarm" Kisame said with a smirk. He likes to show off a bit. He grabbed two kunai and gave one to each of you. Itachi stood in front and you stood behind him.

"Just point them at me however you like" he said smugly, Itachi placed one near his throat and you just held it towards his back. In one swift movement, Kisame slapped his palm on Itachi's wrist whilst snatching the kunai out of his hand. Immediately he turns on the spot to face you, pulling your arm at full length to his side so you can't cut him and aimed Itachi's kunai at your own throat. You practically blinked and he was there face to face with you.
"Holy - - " He let go and watched your dazed reaction. "You did that so quickly! How in the hell!?"

"Practice" he shrugs with a laugh. "Anyway, continue without me. Sasori said he needed me about 5 minutes ago." He heads off and eventually out the house whilst Itachi continued teaching you as many things possible.

**

"Okay, so from here. Bring your arm around and pin mine behind my back."

"Like ..this?"

"Yes. You're getting the hang of it" he smiles

"Do you think I could do this to someone like Kisame or Kakuzu?"

A light laugh falls out, "Try getting them off their feet perhaps. Those two could just tug their arm and you would fall over"

He demonstrates with you different ways in doing so, swiping their ankle from the side, a kick to the back of the knee and so on.

"Now with everything Kisame and I showed you, try and stop me" he says standing in front of you. "Are you sure?" you say a bit nervously. "Give me everything you got. If someone wants to attack you they're not going to hold back either."

"Alright."

He comes towards you with a punch. You elbow his arm out the way and aim to uppercut him. He dodges and you turn in the spot, elbowing him in the stomach. He moves back to kick you. It was a move he hadn't shown you or something you hadn't expected, so by gut instinct you grabbed his heel and foot and twisted as hard as you could. He spun and fell down, not expecting you to move as you did. He was stunned but incredibly impressed with your quick thinking. You dropped down, pinning him with your weight on his back as you pull his arm behind him, trapping him. You eyes land to the side of Itachi. "Uh oh" you say.

As you get up off of him, he turns and moves his head to follow your eyeline and sees Deidara's clay crushed on the floor. He gets up very quickly.

"Did we just - "

"We take this to our graves" he says now moving furniture back to where it was in the room, tidying up after everything you've been taught.

"But - "

"To our graves!!"

You're a bit shocked with his reaction. "This seems a bit of a dramatic reaction, Itachi" you sweat drop. He ignores you momentarily whilst dragging the coffee table back in place.

"..You're not scared of Deidara, are you?"

"Not at all. But the man hates me with a passion, so he will see this as a threat or an act of war."
You nod understanding as you've physically seen how Deidara is around Itachi and proceed to help him fix up the living room as if neither of you have been there.

Itachi takes both your coats and suggest going out until Deidara returns, "Did I at least do well?" you question as you both walk down the street. He pokes your forehead, "You did amazingly. I have every faith in you."