Morelli

Chapter 11: My Own Life

Santo pov

I lay in my bed with Rory in my arms as we watch some random TV show that's playing. "You should talk to Lucicano. He's probably waiting for you still" She tells me looking into my eyes. I brush her hair out her face placing a kiss on the top of her head. "You know they look up to you" I sigh nodding.

There my little brothers, I'd do anything for them. "I know I know I'll go talk to him" She nods, placing a kiss on my cheek. Going out the room I close the door walking over to his room. Knocking on the door I hear no response. "Luciano" I say knocking going inside. I see him lying down on his side watching netflix. Sitting on the side of his bed he turns around looking at me. "Are you going to leave me here alone?" He shakes his head no sitting up next to me.

"I'm happy you came back" I look at him weirdly pausing his show. "Luciano, why wouldn't I have come back? I told you I was going to." He sighs rubbing his eyes "Daddy, told me that mommy was going to come back she hasn't come back yet. I don't want to lose my big brother. I'm going to miss you" My heart breaks hearing his words.

He thought I wasn't going to come back

"Luciano I would never leave and not come back. You're not going to lose me not anytime soon. Trust me I'm not dying. I'll always come back home Luciano"

"Yeah so then when is mommy coming home?" I don't even know how to explain this to him. There is no proper way to explain it to him. I can't just say yeah our mom is alive she just doesn't remember us. He wouldn't understand. "Mom is coming home soon. I know she is. You've probably heard this 900 times but I know she is. Believe me Luciano" His eyes fill up of sadness hearing my words

I wiped his face smiling at him. "I believe you Santo" I feel a bit more relieved hearing the words I wanted him to say. "I love you Santo" He hugs me tightly and I return it holding him protectively. "I love you more Luciano"  I hear his sniffle back tears resting his head on my shoulder.

"How are you feeling now?" I ask him he takes a deep breath "Better I mean daddy talked to me early but I was still scared"

"It's okay to be scared Luci your still only 5"

"You say that like im a little kid i'm bigger than Giovanni"     I laugh at his words and he smiles at me for the first time since I've been in the room. "Yes Luciano your older than Giovanni but you're still my little brother" I mess with his hair seeing him trying to keep his eyes open.

"Sleep Luciano I'll still be home when you wake up. How about this tomorrow it'll be me you and Gio the whole day" He nods in excitement laying down. "Good night Santo"

"Good night Luciano" I turn on his a/c wrapping him in his blanket. I close the door letting out a deep breath. I go downstairs grabbing two cool bottles of water. I'm glad my brothers look up to me. I want to be that role model for them.

This is one of the reasons why I stopped drinking. I didn't want them to see me in a drunken state all the time. Granted I made sure they were always sleeping when I got drunk but it's still something that was in the back of my mind. What if they saw me drinking my life away?

I lay next to Rory holding her close. She's the main reason I stopped drinking. My lovely Rory. I'd do anything for her. She is the reason why I stay alive. "How'd it go?" She mumbles, laying her head on my chest. "It went well. He talked a lot about how he felt. I promise I'd take him and Gio out the whole day tomorrow. I think they need it" She lazily smiles at me.

"I'm glad you talked to him, you're a great person, my love. The best role model they could get"

"I'm glad I could be the best person for them I just wish I had that sometimes"