Harry Styles Fanfiction - Remember Me?

Chapter 125

May 2016
**YOUR POV**
„You know I couldn't go through this without you. I already couldn't really handle it when you got sick. I don't know what I would've done if I was alone in this." Harry told me, looking up to the sky as he stretched his legs out in front of him, crossing them and leaned back, placing his hands on the grass for support.

I placed my hand on his. „We're in this together, okay? We went through a lot of shit together ever since we were kids. We can do this too...together." I looked at him, making him look back.

He nodded. „That's true. We can do this."

I leaned in to kiss his warm cheek before he started talking again.

„I've been thinking..."

„Yeah?" I asked when he hesitated.

„These past few days I couldn't stop thinking about you..." He stopped again.

„About me?" I questioned.

He looked at me again. „About the time you were sick."

„Oh." I said silently, wondering what was on his mind.

„Now that Robin passed and I already feel miserable, I can't stop thinking...What if it happened to you back then? What if...what if you didn't make it?"

„Harry." I said silently, tilting my head as my eyes got glossy at what he said.

„There are so many what ifs. Honestly, I wouldn't have been able go keep going without you. I think I would have-."

„Don't say that, Haz." I stopped him, knowing what he was about to say. „Please don't. Listen to me, baby. That was 7 years ago, almost 8. Let's not go back there...let's focus on the present."

„But it came back...and I couldn't help you, I couldn't be there." His voice was trembling.

„Harry my love, even if you knew, you couldn't have done anything to make it go away and you know that. And you also know why I didn't tell you. There's a reason for that." I said softly.

„I just...imagining a life without you is..."

„Babe, you need to stop thinking like that. I'm here...right here. Right next to you, enjoying every second I get with you, because you make my life just so much better and more special." I told him with a little smile. „Yes, I was sick, but now I'm fine, I'm here...with you and it means the world to me."

„I love you so much. Don't ever forget that."

„I definitely won't. I love you too, H, more than anything in this world."

He laid down in the short grass, signaling for me to lie down next to him, so I did and rested my head on his tummy.

„Every time we're here together, I feel as if we're 10 years old again, as if we never left." Harry said, running his hand through my hair.

„It does feel like it. For me, coming here, back home is so freeing. Here we're not the „famous pop stars, we're just Harry and Y/n, known as the annoying, little kids from the neighborhood, that only caused trouble."

He let out a little laugh. „Come on, we weren't that bad."

„Most of the time we were good kids...right?"

„Suuure. Especially you."

„Heeey!" I slapped his shoulder lightly.

He just giggled. „Those were good times."

„The best." I agreed.

„Hey can I ask you something?" Harry wondered. „It's pretty random."

„Anything." I responded.

„Remember when we first met again last year at the MTV awards?"

„How could I ever forget? You had an asthma attack right in front of me."

He chuckled. „I did. But I was wondering, what was going through your mind when you first saw me?"

„Well you know, I was told you guys wouldn't even be there, that's why I attended in the first place and then suddenly I saw you. You stood there as frozen as I was. I remember being terrified, because I wasn't ready to talk and explain everything. But I also remember looking at you and seeing how you matured. You grew your hair out and got even taller than you already were, but you were still you. The way you walked, your sweet smile...you were still the Harry I let go of. You were still my Harry." I explained, thinking back at that moment. „I didn't really keep track of what you guys did. I tried to get away from my phone and all around it, so I had no idea about what to expect if I'd ever see you again. You were so perfect, but I could see in your eyes that you were hurting and it broke my heart knowing it was because of me."

„You had your reasons and I understand. Still do."

„And I couldn't have been more thankful for that. It was still hard to see the person you love hurting though, that's why I'm showering you with nothing but love now." I grinned.

He chuckled again. „I appreciate it." He joked. „I remember seeing you and not believing it. I thought I'd never see you again and then there you were. You looked so beautiful." He said. „Can't believe the first time we talked again was because of my asthma attack."

„I'm glad I was there. Firstly to help, because obviously the crew didn't get what was happening and secondly...who knows if I would have had the courage to talk to you again if it weren't for that." I told him honestly.

„Oh don't worry. If you wouldn't have, I would have." He smiled.

I smiled back, sighing afterwards as I thought back of those times. „I honestly think Robin would be proud of us." I then said as I looked back up at the stars.

„He definitely would. Look at us. We got big careers, coming out of a small town in England.
We're making a difference. We're working hard and we're doing what we love most, even if it meant leaving at only 16 years old. He would be so proud, I know it. We're part of something big and we should be proud of that and ourselves."

„You said that so beautifully." I interlocked my hand with his. „Can I tell you something?"

„Of course, baby." He listened.

„I wanna play my show here in Manchester, at the Manchester arena instead of London. I'm home here and I wanna do it for Robin." I told him. „Was thinking about it for a while."

„I love that idea." Harry said. „It's gonna be a special show for you, so why not do it at home? And it would be a beautiful tribute."

„Yes exactly. That's what I thought too. I'll change the location with management tomorrow."

„I can't wait." He smiled. „What's the new date? You said you postponed it." He asked.

„It's exactly one month from the old date." I told him.

He nodded. „It's gonna be amazing." Harry smiled again.

„It is." I smiled brightly at the thought.

„Listen." Harry then started. „As we're talking about management and all...ours recently asked what I'd think about doing some shows in the UK." He told me.

„They did?" I wondered surprised. „What did you say? Are you gonna do it?"

He sighed. „Don't think so. Not yet." He shook his head. „Don't get me wrong, it's all I wanna do...to be back, but I think it's too soon. I'm not ready. A spinal fusion recovery takes up to a whole year and I'm only halfway there at the moment. I don't know, I just don't feel ready. I mean the slightest hit in my back or fall still causes a lot of pain and could injure my spine. I don't wanna risk it." He explained to me. „Doctor Brown said to still take it easy and take my time, so I'm gonna do that for a little while longer." Harry said. „I don't wanna end up with a permanent back injury just because I didn't wait. I'm only 22 and I wanna live without any limitations."

I nodded at what he said. „I totally understand that. You know best when you're ready. And if you're not, that's just how it is and it means you need a little more time which is understandable. You don't have to be ready right now and nobody expects that from you." I told him. „It's your back, your surgery and your health. It's your body. You're in charge."