Running Scared

75. Song

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Elisa's P.O.V

"Alec did you kill Gilfred's mate?" I asked in a single breath.

He immediately pulled his hands away from my face, "What the hell are you talking about Elisa? I never met his mate. He said he had not found her yet. And why would I kill his mate?" He asked, shock dotting his eyes.

I took a breath of relief. I knew my Alec would never do this.

But judging from Gilfred's eyes, they appeared to be speaking the truth.

Ugh! I don't know whom to believe.

"Alec are you sure? Because that seemed the only reason he had to kill me. I never did something to provoke him or harm him. Why would he want me dead? His eyes held that fire Alec. The fire of revenge." I said moving closer to him.

"No Elisa, I would never do something like this to him, especially him. You knew what he once meant to me." He said, hurt passing his eyes along with the hint of something else.... hopelessness?

"I never thought he would be the one to betray me like this. I thought that I at least  had someone like my family. After my mother died I was all alone, there was hopelessness in me but then I met him and he changed me. He became like a Father to me, A Father I needed at that time. He's been with me all time. And then you came bringing a new ray of hope in my life, a hope I crushed with my hands and I will never forgive myself for it.

"You gave me the hope of feeling live again. When you said you love me, it felt as if my heart came back to life after 600 years of dormancy. I never knew what love was until you but I'm a monster Elisa, what I did to you is the most wretched thing I've done in my entire existence just because I blindly trusted the man who never became my family. I don't even know why you're still standing here when you should run far away from me. I've lost everything." By the end tears were running down my cheeks.

He was so alone in his entire life. The only one who truly ever loved him was his mother. And she too left him alone. I've never seen this side of him. This is his vulnerable side, the side which is full of agony, betrayal, alone and... broken love. He became the monster he claimed to be because he was afraid to love someone knowing that they'll always leave him alone. He distanced himself from everyone but Gilfred because of love yet he says that he never knew what love was. Oh! The irony.

Now that I look in his eyes, I can see that the way he loves me so thoroughly, leaves no part of my soul untouched. It touches my heart as if it was never broken in the first place.

And I promise myself that I'll never leave him. He will never experience the feeling of being alone again because he'll have me forever.

No one can ever love me as much and as deep as Alec can.

I clutched his face in my hands and made him look in my eyes, "You have lost nothing Alec, I'm here and I vow it that I'll never leave you. I love you and I know that no person in this world will ever love me the way you do. You're not alone Alec, you've me. You've my heart for eternity Alec and it will belong to you forever. I'm not leaving you ever again." I said sealing my vow by kissing his forehead.

"Leave me when you have time Elisa. I'm not the good guy. Do you know what I did when I was 17? I killed my own father with my bare hands. I've killed countless people over centuries Elisa,I'm a murderer, a soul that's supposed to rot in hell for eternity. I'm like a prickling thron Elisa, I'm scared that I'll hurt you again. Leave me." He said, his eyes becoming cloudy.