When Hate Turns To Love (Niall Horan Fanfic)

Chapter 87

"Call me if there are any problems." I told my mom as I grabbed for my bag. My mom wasn't my favorite person in the world but she was my mom and she was there for me at the moment which I was grateful for.

"Of course honey. Call me if you need anything and I hope everything works out baby." She pulled me into an embrace and kissed my temple before letting me go.

I walked outside and got in the car trying to clear my mind. I needed to think of what I was going to say and what I should do...

My mind has been so clouded and I just want things to clear up and be happy again, like they were before. Happy.

I took the long way, my fingers nervously tapping on the steering wheel as I played out all my options. I loved Niall, there was no doubt about that but I'm not sure if I love him enough to put myself through... this. 

When I got to the complex his car was in a different spot which made me nervous. Had he gone out drinking? Even after what I told him... My stomach was doing flips as I was walking up the stairs. I really really didn't want him to be drunk. I don't know what I would do.

I got to the door and unlocked it, the smell of cleaning supplies almost knocking me off my feet. The living room was spotless. All Nat's stuff put in the corner neatly, picture frames dustless and the floor shining. 

"Niall?" I called out and he shouted back from the kitchen. I put my bag down and walked into the kitchen, the smell of waffles and sausage filling the room.

"Babe." He breathed smiling as he turned around. He put the spatula down and walked over to me, well more like ran, and enveloped me in a huge hug. I sunk into his arm, the feeling too good. "Hi."

"Hey." I whispered burying my head into his neck. He had my favorite cologne on. He was trying and I was happy.

"I, uh, I wasn't sure if you would have eaten so I went out and got some breakfast stuff."

"I just went food shopping a few days ago." I told him taking a seat at the table.

"I know, but we had no waffles and they're your favorite." He flashed a smile at me before taking all them off the pan and putting them on the plate. He put everything on the table and poured us both a glass of orange juice. 

"Uh, Niall I don't like orange juice." I told him feeling kind of bad because of how hard he was trying.

"Oh fuck, I'm so sorry. I forgot, I'm so sorry." He jumped up and took my glass rinsing it out. "Milk? Coffee? Tea? What do you want? I'm so sorry." He asked frantically searching the cabinets. 

"Ni, it's alright." I laughed a little, trying to make him feel better. "Just give me one of Nat's juice boxes." He gave me a small smile and got one from the fridge, placing it infront of me. "Calm down, yeah?" I placed my hand on top of his rubbing the top of it.

"Sorry, I just, I'm sorry." He took in a deep breath, closing his eyes. "I've just been so jittery thinking about you and Nat not being in my life and I've been so fucking stupid. I mean I must really be an idiot." 

"I know you are." I smiled removing my hand from his and cutting up my waffles. "But you're my idiot. That's only okay though when you're being an idiot without alcohol. A sober idiot, that's my idiot."

"As soon as I have time I'm gonna go talk to someone, you know, to help me. I'm not gonna do what you're dad did to you. I'm not him, I promise." He pleaded, his eyes burning into mine.

"I believe your words but I haven't seen anything yet. I love you so much Niall, and it kills me to even imagine living without you, so please, for me and Nat, try. If it helps I'll talk to the boys and we can all figure out a way to help you steer clear of the pubs and such. Okay?"