Lose

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"He doesn't talk much does he?" Smeller bee looked at Zuko as the stranger sat in silence, didn't touch the food that was handed to him as he stared at his knees blankly.

"He might be going through some things, keep it between you and me but he jumped off a fire nation ship," jet slurped his soup as there was make shift homes all around with other children talking and laughing, some younger ones surrounding Zuko from above and observing.

"Why?" The young girl asked confused as long shot sat with them and kept an eye on Zuko.

"Treason and theft," jet shrugged.

"Can we play with your swords?" One of the children asked creeping around Zuko curiously.

"Can I play with your hair?" A little girl blushed with a shy smile.

"Where are You from?" A child asked.

"You have pretty eyes," another giggled a little but Zuko stayed silent with his eyes down.

"Mister are you sad?" The little girl stood in front of him as she bent to the side and lowered her head to meet his eyes.

"Can you talk?" A little boy came up behind her peaking over her shoulder, he seemed like he was six, she couldn't be much older.

Everyone here was on the side he fought against, they fought his side. But they're all the same and didn't have a home, parents, to hide up in the trees.

"Are you hungry?" The little boy crawled behind the girl and pointed at the bowl of stew.

Zuko didn't bother to look at them but pushed the bowl to them.

"It's yours," he finally said seeing the hunger in the children's eyes. The little girl gasped at his voice as the boy sat in front of him and grabbed the bowl.

"Thank you mister!" He beamed brightly at the newbie as he started to eat the strew. The girl smacked him in the back of the head disapprovingly.

"We have some bread if you'd like a piece?" She offered but Zuko was like stone again. "I'm sorry about my brother,"

"Not hungry," he said crossing his arms and leaned back.

"Oh... okay," she nodded softly as Zuko just wanted to close his eyes for a moment but there was to many people around, Azula could be close too.

"Hey kids go play somewhere else, let the guest have some breathing room," jet shooed the children as long shot sat next to Zuko to get the kids to back off.

"They get excited with new people," jet chuckled as smeller bee handed the bowl to the little boy so he didn't spill.

"It's fine," Zuko mumbled closing his eyes a little but felt a tap on his leg and saw the boy in the hat next to him.

"That's long shot, he's our archer," jet nodded to him and Zuko looked at him. The fire bender made a motion with his hand to ask if long shot was deaf.

Long shot shook his head but responded in his own little hand motions in sign language so he didn't have to speak. Zuko nodded understanding.

"Of course you know sign language," jet quirked a brow at him.

"I was.. I was temporarily deaf on and off, my.. my brothers taught me," Zuko gulped a little looking down. Lee showed him the basics in case the deafness got worst when he was younger.

"And your hearing came back?" Smeller bee didn't buy it.

"My hearing in this ear is basically gone, and I've been caught in a couple of bombings that made it hard," Zuko explained looking up finally but there was no emotions. "It's just war,"

"He's not wrong, it is just war," jet agreed.

"But that's also why I need an answer Lee, are you in or out?" He sighed a little looking at him calmly.

"I don't know,"

Jet glared unamused at the answer.

"Why not?"

Zuko inhaled deeply as he thought about a good reason, if he left out of the blue it would be suspicious, they found him in the ocean after jumping ship. But he was also a fire nation soldier, they would kill him, the earth kingdom would kill him. But what did he really have to lose? If he died would it really be worth anything to anyone?

"Look, I lost a lot of people recent, my family, I just don't know if I should be joining anything right now," Zuko kept his eyes down as the three looked at him.

"We all lose people," smeller bee scoffed.

"Yea, I know," he sighed hugging his stomach a little. It hurt, it hurt so much still knowing he was never going to see them again, he missed Lee, he wanted him to annoy him still, to poke and hug and push him, he didn't know he would miss his brother so much, he missed marco and cho, cai, don, van, Kim, jin, Hyun, jac, ping, kam. He missed all of them, he missed all the soldiers that have been killed in the past three years.

"You okay?" Jet asked.

Zuko was surprised feeling something drop on his hand and saw it was water, he reached to his face and felt the tear that escaped.

"Shit sorry, fuck," Zuko hissed wiping his face quickly.

"Did you see them get killed or something?" Jet asked quietly and concerned for the boy.

"No, part of me wishes I did, they just... I didn't see anyone killed, they were just suddenly gone, my brother..." Zuko put his hand over his forehead looking down.

"I don't even know how they died," he whispered. He knew how, it was the avatar, but he didn't see how...

"I'm sorry," Jet nodded with sympathy. "Your parents too?"

"No, they've been gone for a long time, but he was all I had left," Zuko sighed getting it together, he had to stop the childishness, get his shit together now.

"Stay the night, you just escaped the ship, you'll be safe here for the night, leave in the morning, if you need anything you can always come back," Jet patted his shoulder with a grin.

"You don't have to do that, the food was enough," he shook his head.

"Lee,"

"I insist, I feel like you and I are more alike than we think,"

If only the poor kid knew.

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