Stairs in the North :: seoksoo

SITN :: 68

*seokmin*

bumaba ako agad sa lobby once johnny had informed na nandito na daw sya but before that, i made sure that i looked decent though my eyes was really swollen and was red due to too much of crying earlier. when i went down, i saw johnny was standing beside his mercedes car while holding a brown paper bag, prolly some foods he bought for me. he was always like that so it wasnt new to me.

i called his name and i saw how his face lit up the moment our eyes met and he even stood properly like a man himself. the lit up in his face suddenly faded as i was now standing in front of him and those changed into worried look. he prolly noticed the swollen and the bloodshot in my eyes. hindi ko naman kasi kayang itago yun so i let it like that.

"dont tell me he hurted you again?" he flexed his free hand to reach for my left cheek as he caressed it gently.

i giggled. "its not because of him, i swear." i defended kasi totoo naman. yup, ten percent of it was about that person being missing in this kind of situations, but still, mas matimbang padin na dahil to don sa nagpakita kanina. "what did you bought for me this time?" i asked, changing the topic.

now, he was the one who laughed. "your favorite."

my eyes widened. "pizza!"

johnny and i settled to eat the pizza at the back of his car, good thing dahil halos wala nang tao sa complex since it was holidays and all of the tenants including my friends were back to their respective residence. ako nalang talaga natira dito. i was supposed to go back already to the mansion today before christmas but things happened and parang ayaw ko nang bumalik pa ulit don. and i dont even know where i could get to celebrate christmas. . siguro dito nalang din sa dorm since sanay naman ako mag-isa.

si jisoo hyung? i mean. . sa family nila jisoo hyung? oh, nakakahiya. and for worst, jisoo hyung and i arent in a good terms for about a week now right after he left the complex before. after non, hindi na kami nagkita. i had never heared any updates about him, and about that seola so nakakahiya kung kila mommy hong ako pansamantala.. and for sure, if that happens, jisoo hyung wouldn't want to see me. so to be fair enough and not to make things worst for the both us, mas mabuti nang di muna kami magkita.

and ayoko padin naman syang makita. . now that i was still vulnerable about what is happening inside my family. ni hindi ko pa nga alam paano nakalaya yun e and how my mom forgave and accepted him that quick.

while we are eating, johnny kept asking me what happened. . so even if i wouldn't want to share it to others, i was left no choice. tsaka okay nadin siguro yun, kesa sarilinin ko yung problema knowing that i couldnt take it that much. johnny was only listening to me while i was telling him what happened inside my family, pero hindi buo. some scenes from what happened before still needs to remained confidential.

i was fighting the urge not to cry while telling him about that, but it still pained me to the fact that i became sensitive to that topic. thats the trauma that i have that i dont know if it could be cured. johnny was wiping my tears and was nodding to every words i was telling him. his eyes screamed so much worries and concerned. and through that, i can see how i mean to him. . more than he mean to me.