Kingdom

86.Court Manners (1)

How much time has passed? A minute, an hour or a thousand years. Jungkook doesn't know and doesn't care. He is happy. That's enough. He is happy to be close to her; to trace his finger over her shoulder and to listen to her giggle at his compliments. He is happy to be with her. That's enough. That's everything. It's the closest to heaven he has ever been.

A sudden noise makes them both jump up, painfully awoken from the sweetest of dreams. The culprit? Mira's handmaiden who has returned to look for her mistress.

"I am in the dressing room," Mira says through the door. "Could you go prepare a bath for me, I will be there in a minute."

And just like that, before he can comprehend what is happening, Kook is asked to leave. Mira hands him his clothes, talking about him sneaking out while she keeps her handmaiden distracted.

"Wait for a few minutes after I go out." she says, tying a robe around the naked perfection of her body. "Then you can leave. The bathroom is way at the back, so she won't hear you."

"Can't you send her away?" Kook asks, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her nearer. "So that we can stay together all night?"

Mira hesitates. "I already told her to wait for me..." She looks down, biting her lips. "I think you should go. We can meet again tomorrow."

She plants a kiss on his lips and slips out of his arms to leave the room. Once she is gone everything that happened seems unreal, like a dream. Was she really here? Was she really his? Will Kook wake up now and find himself back in his old room in Ilsan? Maybe... But he can't stay naked in a closet waiting for that to happen. He needs to keep living this dream.

Jungkook gets dressed slowly and walks out of Mira's residence even slowlier. He should be more careful, only that he isn't. He is not walking but floating, stepping on clouds. His mind is dazed; his body feels funny. He throws the remaining apple from one hand to the other; then bites into it, hungry for its fresh taste. Its weird magic can't do much more to him now.

Magic.... he feels it everywhere. Is he drunk? He feels drunk.

The fresh air of the early evening fills him with the desire to wander in the garden all night, to sing songs and bathe in moonlight. He feels so young, so carefree. This time he doesn't get lost - his feet bring him directly to the rooms of the guards. He washes himself and changes his clothes, all done in a daze. His body feels refreshed, but his mind remains still enchanted.

But once he remains alone in his room, the colorful clouds he walks on start to turn gray. Jungkook looks around the small space that is to be his home. His room is not more than a few square meters large, with a tiny window, narrow bed and a single chest for clothes. The desk he is given is so small that it looks more like a night stand than a desk. But of course. What use could a guard have from a writing desk...

Then it hits him - the realization how insignificant he is. The walls of his room seem to narrow around him, as if crushing down on him. He opens the window to let some air inside. Yet he still feels like suffocating.

Jungkook was crazy to dream of her. To hope whatever happened between him and Mira is the start of something. It's a dead end. A free fall that finishes with a crash. He knew that and thus kept his distance. But all those stupid memories made him act recklessly... He has no one to blame for his stupidity but himself.

What does Jungkook have to offer to a woman like Mira? A tiny window and a single bed...

Kook hides his face in his palms, closing his eyes to the reality that surrounds him.

Maybe if he works hard for the King, he could rise to a better position. But in a peaceful time, a guard can't be much more than a guard. Maybe the Chief of Defense of the Palace... but that's hardly a Lord, Governor or a politician.