The Search Is Over

Chapter 18

Chapter 18: If I only Could, I'd Make A Deal With God,And I'd Get him to Swap Our Places

As soon as he returned to #12 Grimmauld Place, Kreacher attended directly to Master Regulus's request that he destroy the locket. Well...rather he tried his absolute utmost to attend to it, but nothing worked on the bloody locket! Not fire, not shattering or melting spells, not his attempt to transfigure it into glass then shatter it, because it would not transfigure either! Eventually he tried to physically pound it to death, but it was indestructible! Nothing he attempted even put a scratch on the blasted cursed thing. Kreacher had never seen the like, and was growing extremely frustrated before recalling Master Regulus saying that if he had trouble with the task, they would research more together and figure it out. With that in mind, he hid the locket away under his bed for the time being. Once that was done, Kreacher waited for Regulus to return. He waited and waited, busying himself with polishing this and that then at last making dinner for a silent yet obviously worried Mistress. As hours passed, the elf became more and more agitated. Eventually he apparated back to the cave, because unlike human wizards including Voldemort, who was apparently somehow still a little human, he did not need to ride to the cave in the boat. His elf magic was not blocked by whatever antiapparation wards had been placed on the area. Master Regulus was not in the cave, though. Despondently, Kreacher's gaze fell on the insipid lake as the obvious concern rose up in his mind. What if Master Regulus was dragged in as Kreacher had been when unable to resist the need to drink. He could not apparate himself away as an elf could. Instead Dear Master Regulus would be at the mindless mercy of those slimy monstrous Inferi! Kreacher's breath hitched as he sat down hard on the floor of the cave. What a bad elf he had been not to insist on waiting with Master Regulus! Master Regulus was smart, though...Very smart. He would have remembered how Kreacher had suffered and thus taken precautions, the elf assured himself. Still where was he and why wasn't he back at home with Kreacher where he belonged? Perhaps he was, Kreacher thought in a sudden burst of hope. Perhaps Master Regulus had arrived back home just as Kreacher had left to check for him in the cave. The elf sprang to his feet, ready to return home and reunite with Master Regulus. As his gaze fell on the lake again, he wondered if Master Regulus had managed to destroy the Inferi after all. Using a spell of air of the sort he would use to sweep a floor, he ran it through the water, hoping that a disruption would cause the monsters to move if they still were able to do so. When shriveled ashen hands suddenly broke the surface of the foul black water, Kreacher apparated hastily away and back to #12 Grimmauld Place. He checked Master Regulus's bedroom, then the library, but both were empty. The fear returned then with full force that somehow brilliant Master Regulus had still erred. He shook his head in denial even as the tears began to silently stream down his face. He could not even go to Mistress with the problem because wonderful yet in this case apparently foolish Master Regulus had ordered him not to do so. He understood Regulus's reasoning on the matter, as it was much the same as Master Orion's. The Mistress was safer not knowing. Besides knowing had gotten enough people killed or worse. The poor Lestranges! Even now Kreacher felt ill to recall the odd blank look on their faces that fateful night when the Dark Lord had worked his compulsion magic on them. At thought of the Lestranges, Kreacher was tempted to go to them, but not knowing what The Dark Lord had done to them made him hesitate. What if they were compelled to tell him anything Kreacher or Regulus came to them with? No, he decided, that wasn't safe either. All night Kreacher did not sleep as he waited up for Master Regulus, hoping and praying he would somehow return home to him. Hoping that something unforeseen had happened that didn't involve his Regulus being dragged into that lake without Kreacher there to help him out of it. When the sun rose and there was no Master Regulus, Kreacher had to draw the conclusion that the most beautiful, wonderful, brilliant, precious person in the world wasn't going to return to him and probably was no more of this world. Why hadn't Master Regulus simply allowed Kreacher to do it again, the elf wondered, sitting on the floor in Regulus's room and rocking back and forth in his grief. Dearest Master Regulus had wanted to spare Kreacher a repeat of the suffering, but unlike gentle Master Regulus, Kreacher could survive it. If only he had insisted that Master Regulus let him do it! If only he'd disobeyed his orders just this once and waited for Master Regulus so that they left the cave together! He could've punished himself for disobeying later, but at least Master Regulus would still be alive. Master Regulus! Now those intelligent captivating eyes may never gaze so intently into Kreacher's ever again. Their lips may never again meet in the heat of their forbidden but oh so sweet passion. Master Regulus may never come to inherit the Black family fortune. Such a bright star he was and now he would likely shine no more. For a time it hurt too much to cry again as these stark realizations assaulted poor Kreacher's mind...Then when it hurt just enough to cry, Kreacher was unable to stop. When at last he did, he felt dead inside, hollow and empty and hopeless and defeated. He had his duties, though, and he would care for his mistress. It was what Darling Regulus would want, and Master Orion too. They had both trusted Kreacher and he would not let them down. More than once, though, more than a million times, Kreacher wished hard with his entire being, that he could change places with Master Regulus.