*Chapter 46*

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Lando's POV

"Is he your mentor ?" Yanique ask as we drive back to her apartment. It has been couple minutes of silence earlier, but I could see the questions popping out of her head every time she fidgets in her seat.

On the way back we stopped at cook shop as requested by her and got food but I won't be trying anything new today.

"Mentor for what?" I laugh. My eyes still fixed ahead on the road.

"Shooting ... you know , he did mentioned that the last time you visited there you were as short as his wheelchair.. so you were a kid right?.. by the way, how did he end up in a wheelchair?"She's really a sponge, soaks up everything she hears.

"He was just exaggerating, and no he's not my mentor and never was. My dad taught me how to shoot , my uncle just perfected my aim and a gunshot to his spine caused him to be in that wheelchair" I admit , not wanting to give either of them credit for creating a monster out of a thirteen years old.

"Oh...so did.."

" I need a more concrete answer about you going to Canada" I pull into the parking lot and park next to her car.

Yanique's POV

Things have definitely changed drastically ,one obstacle after another. I just want enough time to breathe at least.

It's still hard knowing that my own father is going the extra mile to put the man I love behind bars even though apart of me knows Lando isn't any saint. It still doesn't take away from the fact that my dad is only doing this for his personal gain and my mom supports it because she wants to wipe the shame out of her eyes. 

The apartment door closes and we are right back at square one, literally. Since this is the exact spot we last spoke about this topic , I welcome the smell of coconut scented candles as I take off my sneakers.

"Yanique.... Is it a yes or a no?" He ask in a monotone, already seeming to run out of patience.

You can taste the seriousness dripping off his words. I swallow the lump in my throat before I turn around to face him.

His face hard as a rock.

"Nurses don't get paid well in Jamaica Lando, yes I know that you replaced the offer for the scholarship but it is more than that for me. This has been my dream for a long time ?" I finally remember to breathe and my chest raises in a recognizable way.

Our eyes meet, his brown flushed with disappointment ,he doesn't keep contact for long ...he looks away.

"You can't be serious right now"He relaxes his body in the couch but his face still remains hardened.

I got a new Lando the moment we walked out of that building , he is much more pressing as if our lives depends on this one decision now. All of sudden he seems so troubled and frustrated, I can tell there is far more to this situation.

"I..I" I stutter.

"Can we figure this part out another time?" I then say in a whisper. I've lost my appetite and I'm ready to go to bed.

"Fuck no!!" He shouts , his voice becomes bitter.

"You haven't given it the slightly thought Yanique ? , my businesses are here in Jamaica and you want to take my child to another country ... to deprive me of time with my child?.... Yuh lose yuh mind ?"

Anger really has away of showing a person's exact thoughts without any filter, I can't believe he just said that to me.

It's the way he uses the word 'my' and not 'our' child ... as if he has somehow gained a great amount of ownership over me.

"You have your businesses here ! All I have is my dream that I've been waiting to become reality for years!!! I can't give up everything for you Lando, I don't own anything and I need to ! Our child can't only see daddy working and achieving his goals .. what about mummy too? What about me !!!!"

Yeah...definitely my pregnancy hormones kicking in or else I wouldn't have the courage to stand up for myself like that.

Not gonna lie , that one surprised me too.

"You'll still have your fucking career here ! If your salary is a problem then that's an easy fix! I make enough to take care of that ... suh if yuh wah rassclaaat wuk den duh dat ya suh, money isn't di issue Yanique!"

I'm now lost for words because not only does he not realize how much this means to me , he has totally looked over the point of me ever making something of myself without having to depend on him at all. Pregnancy shouldn't have taken away my dream ... I don't expect him to be excited about me migrating but at least supportive of me finally pursuing my career!

The tense silence has been going on for a minute now , I sit in the couch across from him and burry my face in my palms that's when I feel the wetness from my eyes and suddenly realize it's my own tears.

I look over at him and he is still seated in the couch . His eyes doesn't leave me, so much emotions being held back in them . His fingers tap on his kneecap and his breathing uneasy.

He clears his throat and then speaks after what feels like an hour of deafening silence inside the room.

" Get the job you always wanted...I will not be another person who dictates your life to you. I'll be leaving for England weekend, I don't know how long I'll be there for ....probably a few months ....you'll be taken care of and protected here until I get back"

My jaw drops , my mouth becomes parch and I stare at him blankly. I'm beyond shock, I'm horrified .

I'm too stunned to speak or even react , my mind is clouded , I can't even think clearly.

Is this really happening ?

Few minutes later and I'm still unable to move a limb, he has already left the room.

How can he be so cold?

Insensitive.

Unreasonable.

Lando's POV

Mi out ya a fight battles in the perfect sight of her ! Just for her fucking safety , for her approval, her acceptance just fi one day she tell mi she aguh pack up and lef!

There are so many things I would have done my way but instead I chose the way I thought she would be able to see the changes in me and stay.

I replaced the offer on the table.

I did it ... her way.

And yet !

She still wah deprive me of spending time with my child ! Pack and fucking leave di country without so much of thinking about me ! Our family!

Rassclaat.

Weh mi guh wrong ? ...

I will not be one of her people , telling her what to do with her own life . Soon she would resent me the same way she does them and I can't have that.

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