|54| The forgiveness

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Once I threw the cigarettes at him I walked away and hoped he wouldn't follow

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Once I threw the cigarettes at him I walked away and hoped he wouldn't follow. Because I knew I couldn't stay mad at him for long and he didn't deserve my forgiveness just yet.

I understand this whole thing is too much, that the weight of everything is falling down on his shoulders but treating Danielle like that? After everything she has done for him? Everything she is going through? It isn't fair. She didn't deserve that and as much as I care about him I would never stand by that. He shouldn't treat his family that way.

Looking down at my phone I wonder if I should call her or not. Make sure she is okay. With everything that's going on this was probably the last thing she needed. She has to be around four or five months into pregnancy right now and I'm sure the longer it passes the more difficult it gets. I can't imagine how difficult it must be to go through a pregnancy without the person who was supposed to be there too.

I should call.

Pressing her name on my contact list I hit the call bottom and wait. When I think she isn't going to reply the call connects.

"Did something happen, is he okay?" She asks, her tone worried.

Even after all that's the first thing she asks. The world doesn't deserve a woman as good as her.

"He is okay, I was calling to make sure that you are okay," I tell her as I sit down on my bed.

She breathes out heavily and then I hear some movement. "I'm okay, it's not the first time he snaps at me like this. It's just his way of protecting himself."

"You can say he is an asshole, I would understand." I try to joke and thankfully it works because she laughs softly.

"Yeah, I won't lie sometimes he really is." She admits a hint of humor in her voice. "But what about you, are you okay?"

"I am, I just throw a cigarette box at him in desperation but I'm sure he will understand. I had a pretty good reason to do it after all." I say laughing too.

"Wish I could have done that."

"Don't worry next time he is all yours." I smile even though she can't see me. "Sure you are down to come with us to the bank tomorrow?"

"Yeah, this needs to get fixed as soon as possible or he is going to go crazy." She pauses. "I don't know if you heard but I tried to convince him of not going after his father again. Matteo is worried and he wanted to tell him himself last time Carlos visited but he feared it will end up like this so he kept quiet. And he didn't ask me to say anything I decided to do it, now I'm thinking that maybe I should have kept quiet too. Should have known that me trying to stop him with everything that's going on wouldn't end up well. He has a lot on his plate."

"Don't feel guilty about it, you were just trying to help, and believe me he knows that but he is overwhelmed. Today he screamed at a poor bank lady because she couldn't give him access to the accounts. It was quite a show." It's not her fault, not at all and I need her to know that.

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