Barely Breathing//Ethis

21||

Ethan's point of view:

I walk into Chris' room and see him laying on his bed. It's sort of weird because he's playing with his fringe. He's got it pulled down so it covers his eyes and he's sort of brushing it with his fingers. He sits up when he hears me and smiles at me. It was a weird smile, though, like he was too happy.

"You have really soft looking hair. I sort of just want to run my hands through it or cut some off and stick it to my own hair" he says slowly, looking at me through the fringe he made in his own hair. I look at him weirdly but brush the weirdness off, walking over and ruffling his hair.

"You're too cute." I laugh, going to step away but Chris grabs my arm.

"Kiss me." He orders, his tone completely changing. I look at him and can't help but feel a tiny bit intimidated. Now I'm this close to him, I can detect an unfamiliar smell. I know I've smelt it before but I can't work out what it is.

"Chris, are you okay?" I ask but I'm met with dark eyes.

"You're so sexy." He almost growls, smashing his lips into mine. At first I'm taken aback but then I sort of relax into it. His hands slide under my shirt so they're resting on my bare skin. I don't like this at all but I don't want to disappoint Chris, so I keep kissing him. When he starts to move his hands down so that his fingertips are under the top of my jeans, I decide that's enough.

"Stop it." I say trying to sound confident and not as scared as I feel

"Anything for me, right?" He whispers in my ear taunting me, I nod gulping, I said I would do anything for him but when I said that I didn't mean this. I don't want this, but I feel like I'm letting him down if I don't.
I try to pull away but he brings a hand up to my head, holding me so I can't get away.
Chris' other hand moves out from under my pants but slides down to my ass and it takes all of the strength I can muster to get his hand off of my head.

"Chris." I warn but he doesn't stop, continuing to kiss me harder.

"Chris!" I say, a little more forcefully.

"God, you're so hot when you're mad." He mutters, moving down to my neck. He leaves hickeys but they don't feel good, they just hurt. I feel like crying and he doesn't seem to care. This isn't Chris.

"Chris fucking Lanzon!" I practically scream, using all of my anger and channeling it into strength. I pin his arm to the bed and slap his other one away. It's like he comes crashing back to reality then because something flickers in his eyes.

"Ethan, I'm-" he starts but I don't want to hear it. I turn around and run out the door, ignoring his cries. When I hear footsteps chasing me, I just run faster.

"Ethan, don't leave!" Chris calls but I do just that. I open the front door and run down the street.

Jakob's house is only two blocks away so I know I'm going there. It's about to rain but I honestly don't care.

When I get to Jakob's house, I'm panting like crazy and crying like hell. I'm glad when it's Jake that opens the door because I'm a complete mess.

"Are you free?" I ask and he nods. I take this as an invitation to walk past him and inside. I'm leaving water all over the floor and I do feel bad, but I'm sort of still in shock.

"Let me get some towels and then you can explain" Jakob tells me, a confused expression on his face.

Half an hour later I am dry and I'm sitting on Jakob's couch. His parents are out at a function for his dad's work so he said I could stay the night. I don't want to go back to the house. I don't want to go back to Chris.

"So can you explain this to me?" Jakob asks once I'm warm enough. He paces along the rug in front of me, waiting for me to answer.

"I came home and something was wrong with Chris" I try. I didn't realise how hard it would be saying it out loud.

"What's wrong with him?" Jakob asks, stopping and looking at me as if he wants me to hurry up and just tell him.

"I walked in and he was acting strange. He said something about my hair and then I ruffled his, but he grabbed my arm and said something slightly dirty. Then he kissed me and I tried to pull away but he wouldn't let me. His hands were touching places I wasn't comfortable with and he wouldn't listen, he tried to guilt me into it and I'm so scared and don't know what to do. I don't want to go back" I cry, breaking down again in front of Jakob.

"That doesn't sound like Chris. And you don't have to go home, okay? You can stay here." Jake tells me but that does nothing to shake my fear.

"I wanted to give him what he wants but I don't want to go that far. I'm not even old enough. Now he probably hates me." I continue, holding my head in my hands.

"No, Ethan. No, you can not let yourself believe that. That was not your fault and he has no right to hate you." He tells me forcefully.

"I'm just so... Upset and disappointed." I cry. Jakob is about to reply when his doorbell rings again. A thought dawns over me as I grow to realise who that most likely is.

I'm out of sight from the door but I can still hear. Jakob looks at me before walking out of the room and into the entrance hallway. I hear the door open and Chris' voice

"I know he's here and I need to see him." Is all he says.

"Fuck off, Chris." Jakob spits harshly but doesn't close the door.

"I know what it seems like but it's not, okay? Please let me talk to him! I need to explain!" Chris starts to cry now but I feel not one drop of sympathy for him.

"No, Chris, you can go back home and be alone with your thoughts. I hope you torture your mind like you've tortured Ethan's and I hope you don't forget what you just did." Jakob almost whispers but I could still hear him. That was harsh and I can't help but wish he didn't say that. What happened last time when Chris was alone with his thoughts?