Barely Breathing//Ethis

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Chris' point of view:

Ethan's screams wake me up early the next morning. I sit up in bed and listen for a few seconds, our bedrooms are opposite each other so he has to be screaming loud for it to wake me, probably Jakob too.

It doesn't take long until Jakob appears at my doorway, even through the darkness I know what kind of look he's giving me:

'you-know-he-needs-you'

I don't say anything and I don't move, my eyes adjust and I can finally see Jakob better. He doesn't say anything to me and both of us have almost forgotten about Ethan screaming, almost.

Ethan screams again, except it's more like a pained cry this time and that's when Jakob moves.

"I get that you're confused or mad, or whatever the fuck right now but you can't sit there and act like it's not affecting you. You can't torture him like this either." He says walking away, a few moments later the screaming stops.

I lie back down and close my eyes, but I'm unable to get back to sleep. I'm not even tired now. I sit up again and push the covers off of me, I walk over to my desk and open the last drawer, taking out Ethan's notebook.

If Ethan can go through it and still write about it then I can find the strength to read it, even if he told me not to.

I flick the notebook open to a random page and walk over to my bed. I sit down and start reading:

His hand was on my shoulder and the other on my back, leading me, pushing me out the room. I tried to push him off and run away but he was ready for that, he grabbed the back of my shirt yanking me back not letting go until we reach the floor all our rooms are on, except he took me to his room.

He opened the door and pushed
me inside, I stumbled over just managing to catch myself with one of the tables. He seemed to take his time locking the door, giving me enough time to grow even more scared.

He finally came into the room and for a moment he just stared at me and I looked anywhere but at him.

"You can't do this" I said nervously shuffling my feet trying to sound as confident as possible

"But I already have," he answered taking a step towards me "you belong to me"

That's when I started to cry, he was right. I'm not my own person anymore.

He took the remaining steps between us until he was in front of me. He went to touch my face but I pushed his hand away.

"Fighting back, are we?" He raised an eyebrow

"Don't touch me" I said looking around the room for any possible escape routes

"Ethan, you know I'm going to anyway" he told me and at the same time he had reached down and unzipped my jeans, I squirmed and tried to push past him as best I could but he grabbed me around the waist and pulled me back, I tried to kick him but failed. He laid me down in the middle of the bed and walked around the other side. I had a chance to run but I didn't, he would have gotten me and then God knows what would have happened. It was bad enough.

"Now Ethan, I'm afraid you've given me no choice here" he opened a drawer and pulled out two sets of handcuffs.

"No, I'm sorry, I'm sorry." I said quickly

He ignored me and grabbed one of my wrists roughly, putting one cuff as tight as it would go on my wrist and putting the other one on one of the bars on the headboard. He walked around to the other side and does the same to my other wrist.

It hadn't occurred to me that he was restraining me so that even when he was finished I couldn't leave. He went and turned the radio on, meaning any other sounds would be drowned out by it.

He came back and stood at the foot of the bed,

"Please don't do this" I pleaded, pulling at the handcuffs, it didn't do anything however due to how tight they were on, it only hurt and left red marks around my wrists.

"Come on, it won't be that bad" he smirked climbing onto the bed, he undid the button on my jeans and ripped them off me. He wasted no time in getting my underwear off either. I closed my eyes when he got undressed, I didn't want to see anything for as long as possible.

I screamed.

He seemed completely unfazed by it and didn't stop. I pulled and pulled at the handcuffs as the pain got worse, my screams turning into choked sobs.

"St-op, please" I cried biting down on my lip "I'm begging you, stop"

"I like it when you beg" he grunted "do it again."

"Please, I don't want this. It hurts, stop." I cried, not even caring about the satisfaction he's getting from it

"How much does it hurt?"

I didn't reply.

He grabbed my waist and thrust with as much force as possible making me arch my back and scream out in pain.

"It's excruciating." I replied after that

Everywhere was hurting and I knew it would only get worse, it did.

It felt like it went on for hours, my hair was sticking to my forehead and I was dripping with sweat. My eyes kept closing for long periods of time and I think I was slipping in and out of consciousness. I had no will to fight, to beg. I had stopped crying too, I had to learn to just endure the pain. The only thing that reminded me I was awake was the pain.

My arms were aching, being elevated and restrained for hours, not to mention the handcuffs were pinching my skin.

He finally pulled out. More pain shot up my back and I winced.

I squeezed my eyes shut when I heard shuffling around the room, I assumed he was putting on his clothes and I wished more than anything that I had my own. I pulled at the handcuffs once again, and once again they proved to be relentless, pinching at my skin.

I started to cry again, I couldn't move without feeling pain somewhere.

I opened my eyes when I thought he was finished but I didn't turn my head to check.

His footsteps came closer to me, only when he spoke did I turn my head to look at him.

"Have you learnt your lesson?" He asked looking down at me

"Yes, yes I have, please let me go" I rushed, maybe a little too desperately

He didn't say anything for a few minutes and I found myself wanting the ground to open up and swallow me whole rather than have to bare the way he was looking at me.

He eventually unlocked the handcuffs letting my arms drop above me, I still didn't move. He picked up my clothes and threw them at me next. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, I was trying to prepare myself for the pain that would be sure to follow.

I stood up and slowly started to put my clothes on, aware that Jeremy was watching. I walked to the door wincing a couple of times.

Once I was in the hallway I breathed a sigh of relief. All I had to do was get back to my room.

Whilst I was walking to my room I passed Ruhi and Maddi, they smiled at me and I smiled back, like nothing ever happened.

I set the notebook down beside me and look up at the ceiling closing my eyes. Each time it gets worse and worse, and now I understand.

I hear footsteps slowly making their way across the hall and I quickly shove the notebook under my pillow and stand up.

Ethan walks into my room and stops a metre away from me and looks down. Something inside of me compels me to hug him, so I do.

I step forward and wrap him up in a hug.

"I love you." I say over his shoulder, but he doesn't reply.

He pulls away and stares past me, I know there's no way I can get out of this. He's already seen it.