Philkas falling in a different way MESSAGING BOOK 1

25 It's never gonna stop unless we tell

Philip

It was the day of Tommy and Tracy's memorial service.

Philip had seen Lukas sneak out knowing he was going to the roof. Philip follows after Lukas."Lukas you alright seen you sneak of the ceremony"

Lukas keeps his eyes on the photo of them"Can't be crying like some bitch not in front of the whole school" Lukas shouldn't care what other people think.

"You know it's a memorial service your supposed to cry everybody is upset about Tommy and Tracy" Lukas looks at Philip"I'm not everyone am I"Philip places a hand on his arm."Lukas listen"

"No I know what your gonna say that the overdose have nothing to do with this"Lukas stands up walking over to the edge of the roof."Woah woah what are you doing" Philip follows him grabbing his arm.

"Can't....keep seeing it" Lukas explains.
"Seeing what what are you talking about?" Lukas looks forward"That guy I'm standing right behind him and I'm holding a fraying pan but I can't move he shoots you and then he turns and look straight at me and he's gonna kill me.... I can't make it stop"

"It's never gonna stop not unless we tell hey look look at me" Philip pulls him away from the edge."I told you it's only gonna get worse if you keep it a secret it's not just gonna go away it doesn't work like that"

"How come your so chilled"Lukas wonders Philips not though that's the problem he's terrified of what might happen to them."I have had to be cool for my mum now I can be cool for you to"

"Your mum know your gay?"Philip caresses Lukas arm calming him down in some way."Yeah, yeah I told her about you" Lukas looks straight at him.

"She won't say anything" Philip tells him knowing the look he was given. "There's nothing to say" Lukas finishes.
"Okay"Lukas runs a hand over his face. "I can't go to this overnight with counsellors talking about my feelings and shit" 

Philip nods still holding him"Yeah I know it's so dumb so what do you wanna do instead?"

"I don't know" Lukas really doesn't. "Something to make me forget this shit" Philip nods having an idea. "I have an idea lets go to the city"