Story Of My Life. (Niall Horan Love Story)

4. Not Good Enough.

I stood in the middle of the bus, unsure what to do. I promised Niall I would make myself at home, but I think I've forgotten how to do that. I picked up the remote and looked up at the TV trying to turn it on. I paused, shock rushing through me as I stared at the TV's black screen, it's shiny surface showing my reflection. 

My face was red and covered in cuts, bruises and dirt, 

my hair was dirty, tangled and oily,  

my clothes where ripped and stained. 

I looked away, sadness ripping a hole in my chest. I dropped the remote and ran to my bunk, where I sat, my hands covering my face. 

'Your ugly, disgusting, and smelly! Nobody loves you! Those One Direction boys are just feeling sorry for you! They don't really care about you! Why did you ever believe them?' I thought to myself, tears dripping down my face as I cried. I stood up, and grabbed my bag, unzipping the top. I pulled out a pair of jeans, the thin ripped material mocking me. I threw them to the side and pulled out a shirt. I held it up, the light shining through the holes and hi-lighting the stains. I let out a yell, dumping the rest of my clothes onto the floor. 

I sat back down on my bed, my gaze on the floor. Robotically I bent down and picked up a shirt and pants and underwear off the floor, determined to get clean. 

After I had locked myself securely in the small bus bathroom I stripped off my old, dirty clothes, throwing them into the corner. I figured out the shower and stepped in, letting the hot water wash over me. I ran my hands over my face, wincing as the water hit the cuts making them sting. I washed my hair and body, twice, trying to make sure I got as clean as I could. 

After I got out I wrapped a towel around myself, holding the heat in from my shower. I washed my face, groaning as the soap stung the cuts, quickly I washed the soap off. I dropped my towel and pulled on my clean-er clothes. I looked at myself in the mirror, halfway pleased with my appearance. The dirt was gone, and my hair fell down my back in a smooth copper sheet.

'To bad this is all a lie, to bad this doesn't even matter to anybody. They will still see you as the dirty, ungrateful brat you are.' My mind told me, I watched as a tear slipped down my cheek, dripping off my chin. I exited the bathroom, falling down onto my bed as I began to cry harder. 

"Hello?" A female voice called into the bus. I stopped crying and looked up and saw a woman walking in, her white-blond hair was long and wavy, her face was kind. She was looking at me, a soft smile on her lips. "Hello." She said, coming into the bunk aria and sitting across from me, stepping over my clothes. 

"Who are you?" I asked quietly, my voice husky.

"My names Louise, but you have call me Lou if you want. Everyone else dose." 

"How'd you know I was in here?" I asked.

"Niall said the band had picked up a new friend and you where in here all by yourself." She said kindly. 

"Oh," I mumbled. A friend, the boys thought me as their friend? But why? 

"Whats you name, sweetheart?" She asked, 

"Audrey." I said, looking away. 

"That's a very pretty name." She said. I looked back at her, anger washing through me.

"It's not a pretty name, nothing about me is pretty!" I shouted, standing up from my bunk. "I mean look at me! I'm ugly and fat and a burden to everybody!" I shouted. Lou frowned, tears swimming in her eyes. She stood and slowly pulled me into a hug.

"Lou?" Someone called. Lou pulled away and looked up.

"What?" She said. I looked up to see a man in a black shirt.

"Liam ripped Harry's shirt open. We need a replacement." He said. Lou groaned before giving me a sympathetic look. I looked down, "I'll be back soon. K." She said softly, leaving with the man quickly. 

I sighed, laying back down, falling asleep quickly.