Loving the Fighter

19

Jax's POV

Breakfast the next morning was about like normal until Boyd walked in.

Kyle and Kellan had already sat down with the rest of us but said nothing when Boyd finally showed up nearly an half an hour late.

I had been left in a daze since I woke up to is morning. It's like I was seeing everything from a stranger's perspective.

I didn't even really know he was there until something hit me on the side of my head.

Without thinking, my hand shot out to grab his while my other hand wrapped around his throat as I pushed him against the wall. One hand dropped his arm and reared back for a punch. People around me started yelling all around me and just like that I was back in the ring.

My fist nearly collided with his face when something grabbed it and pulled me off of him. And then, I was back.

Callum gave me a concerned look as he let go of my hand and pulled me back to the chair I was sitting in before. Boyd shakily sat down in front of me while Kyle scooted an inch or two closer.

To my surprise no one acknowledged what happened and Boyd began talking as if I hadn't just threatened his life.

"You lied to me," he accused, his voice uncertain.

"About what?"

"Therapy is so much worse than you said it would be," he said to which Kyle groaned loudly.

"That place is the devils home," he said to which Ryder nodded in agreement. "I swear they are only trying to make you feel worse about yourself. What's even the point of them?"

"The point is to heal the scaring that your past has left," Liam tried to explain but the three of them brushed him off.

"Well they can keep their healing to themself," Boyd decided as he glared at the table.

"It wasn't that bad," Kellan said as he tried to calm down his boyfriend.

"You only say that because you literally didn't talk to yours the whole hour you were there! You just sat there!"

"Well you had the option to do the same. It's not my fault you didn't do it," Kellan fired back defensively which made me frown internally.

I don't think I've ever seen them fight. Not even when they were forced to. They would just stand in the ring and do nothing.

"You two don't need to start fighting this early. No one is ready for that this morning," I mumble, trying to dissolve the tension as much as possible.

"I'm sure Boyd wasn't ready to get brutally attacked this morning either but you still got to do that," Kyle said with a glare as he stood up from the table and walked away.

I too glare but not Kyle. My glare is set on the table as I try not to punch the closest thing in sight. My jaw was clenched as my fists tightened.

Kellan sighed as he watched his boyfriend leave but didn't go after him.

"You'll have to excuse him. He's been testy lately. Our cabin mates are only getting worse and Kyle is not a fan."

"You don't seem like the person to do this, but you can tell a counselor about them and you can get a cabin change," Callum pointed out with a frown.

"If we do that then it looks like we're running and it would make them think they won. They would think they could pick on us from now on even if we did live in a different cabin." Kellan explained as he piled Kyle's discarded tray on top of his. "I better go find him before classes start so I know he actually goes to them." And with that Kellan was gone.

The day passes in a blur from that point on.

Classes, lunch, helping Ryder in PE. They all meant nothing to me. I stayed in my daze all throughout homework until Ryder burst through the doors yet again, but seemed in a better mood today than last time.

Without a word Liam looked over to me and stood up.

"Might as well get it over with right?" He asked with a small smile that I could tell was fake.

"I'd rather get left nut slammed in car door," I announce as I stood up from the bed and headed to the door.

Ryder and Callum looked like they wanted to laugh as they snuggled on Ryder's bed but they wisely kept it to themselves.

I tried to drag my feet as we walked but Liam wasn't having any of it. Every time I slowed down for any amount of time he was there to remind me that I wasn't time.

When I finally got into my therapist office we sat in silence for a while. Nothing really happened.

He just leaned back in his chair as he watched me like a hawk, much like he did the first time I came but this stoic expression was gone now. This time he watched me a small smile on his lips.

I on the other hand only sat there and glared at him with my arms crossed over my chest.

"So what happened at breakfast this morning?" Was the first words out of his mouth.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"You sure? I was told that you pushed a boy up against the wall of the lunch room and was about to hit him before someone pulled you off of him."

"Then they lied to you because that didn't happen," I said, making sure to keep my voice as even as possible but he still saw through the lie.

He shot me a look that said he wasn't impressed but I stuck to my answer.

"What do you have to gain from telling these lies?"

"What do you have to gain from knowing the truth? It's not like you actually care about any of us. To you we are all one big dollar sign."

"Thats not true," he says a little too quickly. "You think I'm lying?" He asks when he sees my expression.

"Can you blame me? I know nothing about you yet you ask me to tell you everything about me."

"I get that a lot from new campers," he says with a small smile. "How about a game of 20 questions?"

"I'd rather jump off a building." I say rudely to which his smile fell.

He went quite again for a while, his eyes were trained to anywhere but me.

"How do you expect this to work," he asked, "if you don't help yourself. You can't leave until I deem you suitable for the outside world, and I can't do that until I decide whether you will go right back to crime or will never go back to that life again. So help yourself and convince me you won't go back." His voice was so sincere as his eyes begged me to talk. I said nothing for a while.

"I can't convince you," I finally said.

"Why not?"

"Because I can't convince you if I can't convince myself," I say as I stand up. "My hour is up. Have a good day." My words were kind but my tone was harsh as I walked out of the room without a glance back.

Thank you all for 5,000.