Together (Sick & Hurt Liam)

Payne vs Payne (edited)

Liam's POV

The sky is grey and gloomy, snow is in the air and it matches my mood.

Two days have gone by since Funky Budha and I still haven't heard anything from anybody that was there. No phone call, or text, nothing. Maybe what thay said is true, and isn't just some drunk talk. Maybe they really did mean it when they said nobody wants me there. This thought makes my stomach ache.

I grip the steering wheel tightly with nerves as I drive to the town that use to be my home, Wolverhampton. It's just over a three hour drive from Londan but today it feels more like a twelve hour drive. A part of me wants to be there already, to have contact with people again for the first time in two days, but another part of me is dreading it, for my sisters will be my only company.

Before I left Londan I was half tempted to call one of the lads and have them come with me, but I found I couldn't press the button to call any of them. This is their break, their only chance to be with friends and family before going on another tour. I can't disturb that. Just because I don't have a family to spend time with or friends I can hang out with it shouldn't give me to interupt on their time with theirs.

Plus I have family, I have Ruth and Nicole, maybe I'm now nerves being around them and slightly terrified, but I still have them. I'm not going to be totally alone for the next couple of months. I keep repeating this over and over trying to convince myself.

After my parents' house is all cleaned out, I'll call one of the guys and see if I can hang out at one of their places until the holidays, I can do that, I'll be ok.

Before long I am home, I'm in Wolverhampton. Driving down the streets is a lot like greeting an old friend. So many different places bring up different memories, ghosts of a past I have long forgotten.

The old school I use to attend, their doors stilll open and in the windows I can make out figuares sitting in the desk.

The old park my mum use to take me to when I was a kid. The swings now abandoned, covered in snow like a ghost of what once was.

Soon I am pulling into the drive of my parents' home, a house I had bought for them just months before their deaths.

Lights are on and both of my sisters' cars are parked in the driveway.

I sit in the car for a minute, just looking at the house, trying to pull myself together and get ready to face my sisters and say goodbye to my parents. For this is the only closure I will ever get, I could not attend their funeral or see them burried, I did not get to see them one last time, I didn't get to say goodbye.

Collecting my courage I finally get out of the car, bag in hand. Standing here now with my parents' house looming down on me I wish one of the boys were here. They would crack a joke, pat me on the back assuringly or just give me a smile, a promise that they won't leave me, that they have my back.

I head up the walkway and open the front door with ease. I should not have to knock this was my parents' house just as much as it was theirs'.

"Liam! You're finally here! We were starting to think you weren't coming," Ruth greets me right away with a smile on her face.

"Sorry I was running a little late. I overslept," I reply honestly. I don't meet her eyes fearing I will see judgement, hatred or worse of all pity. Ruth and I use to be really close but now here we are and I can't even look her in the eye.

"Liam, about what happened at the hospital..." Ruth begins hestatantly but I quickly interupt.

"I think I'm going to go get settled in. I'll be right back down," I promise already heading up the staircase.