55| blame

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I hadn't slept since the others had retired to bed, although, Molly had given me calming draught to ease my worry for my health as well as Devil's claw to at least try and ease some of the pain. It still didn't help put my mind to rest. Molly had invited a healer from St Mungo's hospital to visit tomorrow afternoon in the hopes of finding out what had hit me that night.

I was still aching but I had figured that laying as still as possible seemed to calm it down a little.

The one thing that worried me was that Fred hadn't come to see me, I understand that his brother was injured too but the whole group said I was far worse off, you'd expect him to check if I was okay or even just comfort me. Harry had told him I was awake but he didn't make an effort to see for himself, I still needed to talk to him about our plans having to change which I was not in the slightest excited for.

I twisted my neck slightly to see if Harry was still sound asleep on the sofa beside mine, it was adorable that he refused a comfy bed upstairs so that I wasn't alone. He looked so worn out even with his eyes closed, I could tell this had all put a strain on him.

The only good news out of all of this was that it was now two AM. Meaning it was officially our birthday.

I shot my eyes back closed when I heard footsteps creaking down to the first floor, for no reason whatsoever. Followed by a crash, someone had knocked something from it's place or their way down, "oh no." I heard someone remorsefully whisper and I instantly knew it was Hermione. I laughed to myself, visualising how frightened she would look right now with the fear of waking up Molly or Arthur.

"Katherine you're awake?" She questioned quietly still not coming into view but hearing my laughing from before, "yes, come here." I half-whispered and she tiptoed her way in past Harry, she knelt at my side staring sweetly at my terrible condition.

"I need you to help me up..." I asked and she stared wide-eyed at me knowing I didn't have the strength or energy to move. But I was determined to get through to her knowing full well I wouldn't sleep from then on. "We need to have one of our chats, but not here, we just have to get to the porch. I'll be fine." I groaned grabbing her hand in mine forcing her to agree, she sighed but stood up taking my other hand very slowly pulling me up so I didn't cry out in pain.

I bit my lower lip so hard that I could feel it bleeding but it was useful for keeping my screams very muffled, she was on the brink of crying staring at my discomfort but I urged her to continue.

A little exercise was most likely exactly what I needed, when she had me up on my feet I kept a tight grip on her forearms, having been off my feet for hours as well as the pain conjoined it was a struggle to keep upright.

"See, wasn't that bad" I whispered sarcastically and she rolled her eyes and linked our arms to support me when walking. It wasn't too difficult to walk much to my surprise, the pain seemed on and off making me really wonder what had happened to me. At this moment in time it seemed unexplainable to anyone who had seen it, and no one really knew what to do from there on.

I looked down to see what state I was in yet there were no visible injuries from the front, I assumed I was dressed by Molly when I was unconscious, she had put me in one of the boys t-shirts but it didn't seem like it would be Fred or George's due to it's small size.

It was light grey colour with a small Bulgarian National Quidditch team logo imprinted on the top left hand side of it, this obviously confirmed it was Ron's. I was still in the jeans I wore when leaving the Dursley's but they seemed to be in perfect condition anyway.

After a few more moments of horrific pain trying to sit down on the step outside, Mione rushed back inside to get us some blankets from the living room. I stared out at the long grass flowing about in the breeze and it made me feel safe, I always felt safe in the proximity of the Burrow even after we were attacked by death eaters.

I felt the warmth of the fabric being wrapped around my shoulders as Hermione took a seat beside me, grabbing one side of the blanket I was wearing and pulling it around her too.

We huddled close to keep us warm in the crisp night air, "so what's up?" She spoke up first wondering why we needed to do this at just past two in the morning.

"Fred asked me to move in..."

"REALLY? Oh that's wonderful!" She gasped but brought her volume back down when remembering all those who slept inside, "I assume you said yes?" I nodded but not enthusiastically like she would have thought.

"The thing is, he made me promise that it would happen as soon as summer was over-"

"But now you can't because we have to find horcruxes, does he know? Or is that why we are talking about this?" Hermione interrupted but it didn't bother me as she understood what the issue was. "I would've told him but the bastard hasn't come to fucking see me." I spat not realising how angry I was over it until just now. I looked at her expression to my sudden outburst as she looked guiltily at me.

"He blames himself." I gave her a confused stare, narrowing my eyes in shock. "What- why would he?"

"You hexed someone chasing him seconds before, so he believes that caught another one of the death eaters attention. I've tried to tell him that it's a load of rubbish, but he won't listen to any of us." I scoffed at how stupid it sounded, if I thought that was the reason In the slightest he would know about it. I did what I did and I have to deal with the consequences. What happened had fuck all to do with him, let alone would I blame him for it. He told me to leave yet I stayed to help him, that's on me.

"That is so stupid, that's like me blaming Remus and Tonks. It was my choice, I have to deal with it." I grabbed hold of the wood on the banister to my left and pulled myself up with multiple groans, this sent Mione into a panic making her rush to my side asking me what the hell I was doing. "I'm waking the dumbass up." She shook her head at my eagerness but allowed me to continue with her help.

Hermione somehow convinced me to not go through with it, coming up with a reasonable argument as to how difficult the stairs would be for me to walk up, in the dark and trying to be quiet. I was now left alone back on the couch, after she could barely keep her eyes open I told her to go to bed and that I would be fine. I thought about what I would do to Fred if he ignored me on my birthday and god would he regret it, honestly I even thought about using this opportunity to say I couldn't move in because he's pissed me off. Then I realised I have to be honest as it would without a doubt come back to bite me in the ass.


- {SIDE NOTE} I'm actually so ill right now so I wasn't very motivated to write anything so I thought I'd give you a small chapter. Not only that but I've sliced my thumb making it impossible to write on my phone without it hurting so I did this on my laptop and I HATE IT I don't know why but writing chapters on my laptop is so difficult for me.

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