The Siren's Call (A Draco Malfoy Fanfiction)

156. Making Amends

Most everyone had gone to sleep but despite his efforts, Blaise couldn't join them. Finally, he sat up from where he had been laying in a sleeping bag and pulled on his coat and shoes. He only had to take a few steps beyond the tent to see where Draco was sitting. The moon was lower in the sky and cast around them a cold glow made stronger by the brilliant white snow. Blaise hesitated a moment before sitting down next to Draco. Glancing over at him, Draco frowned but didn't say anything as he shifted his gaze back to the moon.

They passed several minutes in silence before Blaise finally asked, "Why did you never come to any of us about what was happening?"

Draco stayed silent, thinking a moment before finally admitting, "I was planning to for months but my mail was being watched. Then I was going to tell you all on the train. But when I saw Dioleh in Diagon Alley, I just...I realized that I couldn't bear to lose any of you. I tried to push her away. Then when I was back home, I realized how stupid I was being and that I needed to just tell you all."

"So why didn't you?" Blaise asked quietly.

"I saw you all just before I walked into the compartment to talk to Dioleh," he explained. "You all weren't happy but you were safe from me. Being connected to me had always just gotten you all hurt. So, when I spoke to Dioleh, I just said the most hurtful things I could think of. I was a coward, Blaise. I thought that by pushing you all away I was protecting you but I wasn't. I was protecting myself."

"From what?" Blaise asked, brows furrowed.

"From admitting that I was trapped," Draco said quietly. "I pushed you all away because I thought that if I at least had control over how close you were to me, you couldn't get hurt. Then when I watched Dioleh die...or collapse, I suppose, I just knew none of you could ever forgive me so I never tried to escape."

"Until Imani came along," Blaise filled in.

"I've been having nightmares every night since the Astronomy Tower," Draco explained. "Every time, I watch myself kill Dioleh no matter how hard I try to get myself to stop."

"You still have them?"

"No," Draco admitted. "They stopped when I found out Dioleh was alive." There was a long pause before he said, "I'm so sorry, Blaise. I was a complete and total coward. And an arse. I shouldn't and don't expect you to forgive me."

"Oh, shut it already," Blaise said, glancing over at him with the tiniest hint of a grin. Draco met his gaze cautiously. "Alright, tell you what. I'll help you break back into Malfoy Manor and get out Luna and Ollivander but in exchange, you promise to never be that cowardly idiot again. Deal?"

"Deal," Draco replied, smiling the first genuine smile Blaise had seen from him since before his father had been locked up.

"Guess you finally grew up," Blaise remarked.

"No," Draco said with a small laugh. "I've got a long way to go before then."

"Are you scared?" Blaise asked.

"Of what?" Draco replied.

"You-Know-Who," Blaise explained.

Draco frowned, thinking it over before he admitted, "No. Honestly, I think I spent so much of the last year living in fear that I don't have any more in me left to feel. If he kills me then that's it. I suppose I'll finally get to meet my cousin, Sirius. I heard a lot about him growing up but I never met him."

"I haven't either," Blaise admitted. "I saw him but I never spoke to him. I saw him just before he died. Imani, Andre, and Dioleh did though."

"Speaking of Andre and Imani," Draco remarked. "When on earth did that happen?"

"About a month or two after you dumped Dioleh," Blaise explained blandly.

"Ah," Draco remarked. "And, uh, Dioleh?" Blaise snorted.

"Smooth," he remarked. "She's not seeing anyone."

"Was I misseeing things or were you two a thing during sixth year?" Draco asked with a frown.

"Well, no, technically," Blaise admitted. "I had a thing for her briefly and we talked about it but she wasn't ready and then...after you were attacked I just realized that I was just trying to fill the void you left. And anyway, I knew by how distraught Dioleh was that she wasn't over you."

"Sorry," Draco said awkwardly.

"No, it's not your fault," Blaise replied. "She and I were never meant for each other and I think we both knew that. Nothing ever happened between us."

After a long pause, Draco said, "I know that it's way too soon now, but do you think she'll ever trust me enough to take me back?"

"Maybe," Blaise replied. "In a year or so. Just...it has to be her move, not yours. Don't put the idea into her head."

"I would never," he said. "Not after everything that's happened."

"Good," Blaise replied. "Because I won't let you hurt her again. Dioleh is one of my best friends and she doesn't deserve that at all."

"I know she doesn't," Draco said, not moving his gaze from the moon. As he was sitting deep in thought, a sudden harsh, scalding, burning sensation seized his left arm and he cried out in pain, gripping his forearm tightly until the pain faded.

"What the bloody hell was that?" Blaise asked.

"The mark," Draco explained, sounding slightly out of breath as he lowered his hand. "I can feel it every time he calls for them or they call for him."

Frowning, Blaise asked, "When was the last time you felt it burn?"

"Right after Imani saved me," Draco explained. "I assume it was to tell them all I was to be killed if spotted. Why?"

"Just wondering," Blaise said. "He can't like...track you through that, can he?"

"No," Draco replied. "Otherwise Igor Karkaroff wouldn't have been able to run for a year."

"Oh, right," Blaise replied. "Still. It'll be handy to know when he's summoning people."

"Glad to be of service," Draco replied with an amused smile.

"Look, I'm sorry, mate, for how I've been acting," Blaise said.

Glancing over at him, Draco retorted, "You have nothing to be sorry for."

"Friends again?" Blaise said.

"Friends," Draco agreed.