"I hope I gave you some to believe in, cause none left for me."
"The softest soul can't hurt a fly."
"If I die before I wake, then it's my soul for him to take."
"We can do whatever we want, but boy don't you dare go falling in love."
Get ur tissues ready cause this is definitely the chapter a lot of you guys did not want to happen. this will probably ruin the rest of your day but I wanted to give you two chapters in one day. Don't hate me tho 😒 ~Jocelyn💜 _________________________________
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I gotta admit, night shifts were always the best, no sun out there to disturb my eyes while just waking up from a nap. Eddie was at therapy while I was getting Chris's food ready for when buck had returned back to eddies place with him. I was never the best at helping someone with homework, I would literally make atlas cry when we were younger when I had to help him with his homework, I decided to let Buck handle that.
When Eddie finally arrived I just had finished cleaning up the dishes. "Hey." Eddie said to me and Buck, "hey, how'd it go?" When Eddie sat down I handed him his plate of food, "the usual, crack myself open for 50 minutes and walk out feeling like I was hit by a bus." Buck agrees with him, "sounds like it's working. Chris is in his room finishing homework." Eddie was still down which was understandable, he noticed two drawings on the table and picked it up. "Chris drew this?" It was a pink heart with small hearts surrounding it. "That one's mine. I misunderstood the assignment." I laughed, then Eddie looked at the human heart Chris drew, it was diagram with labels. "You guys ever think that maybe it's not worth it? Not the therapy, the... what we do for a living that makes us need therapy? What I put myself through? what I put my kid through? Maybe it's not a thing, maybe it's just random."
"You're not the only one, I think about that every single day of my life, what's the whole point of sacrificing ourselves to save others if we don't make it? We'll pass the pain and misery of our death on to the next of kin and now they're either suffering or celebrating that we died in honor. I don't know if my family would either be proud I died do something I loved or hate me for being stupid and sacrificing myself?" _________________________________
Lucy was there sitting on the couch staring at the surveillance footage from the call earlier about the woman dangling from her terrace. "Hey, uh, awesome catch." Buck didn't know she was up there until he was already about to sit down. "Mm." That's all she could get out of her mouth, "but- and I say this with some experience here- maybe don't let it go to your head." She shook her head, "that's not- she should've died. Nine times out of ten, I don't catch her or I don't move fast enough or I grab her and she slips through and she takes me with her." Buck was confused by their conversation. "Wait, you're obsessing over things that didn't happen?"
"I'm trying to find out ways that I could have saved her that doesn't involve luck. So I'm ready for the next time." She sighs, "my first year here, a man was hanging from a roller coaster. I didn't get to him in time and he fell, I spend a lot of time running that one back in my mind. What if I had got to him faster? What if the truck had been at a better angle? It didn't matter what hypothetical scenario I came up with, he was still gonna be dead. That lady didn't die, cause you caught her."
"So I accept it was a lucky break and move on?" Buck nods his head. "Look your luck could change tomorrow, we take the wins when we can get 'em." This was now the time for Lucy to ask buck about Artemis. "Is this why you haven't told Artemis the truth about what happened that night at the bar? Why didnt you tell me you had a girlfriend? I would've never kissed you if I had known you had one, let alone Artemis. She doesn't like me in general and I can see why now, she may be a tiny girl but she's tough and a smartass."
