(pART 40 ALREADY WHAAAAT??? wow...thank you guys sm. iLY ALL~ heres a simple one shot, i was feeling a little inspired tonighttt)
jimin was not poetic. not at all, actually. he wished he was, he really liked the way beautiful poetic words sounded when put together nicely. yoongi was poetic. maybe thats one of the reasons jimin loved him so much. so as jimin sat, on the roof of his apartment complex, he tried to think of what yoongi would say right now. he would probably say something about the stars, or life, or both, jimin thought to himself. i wonder if he would think about me, jimins thoughts rang though his own mind, probably not, he concluded in his head.
yoongi gripped his pencil tightly, eyes staring intensely out at the stars, desperately looking for some sort of inspiration. he had been doing this for the last two weeks, staring at a blank paper, that was supposed to be filled with lyrics. his lyrics. but it wasnt. and that frustrated yoongi more than anything. he was supposed to be able to do this, he was supposed to be a composer. its what he loves to do. so why couldnt he do it? he didnt know. but he continued to stare out, searching, for the right words to express the way he was feeling.
jimins back was cold against the concrete, his hands behind his head for support. he did this often now, coming up to the rooftop to mainly just think. or dance. or both. he just liked it up there. the way it was secluded but he wasnt entirely alone, because he could hear the busy streets from below. he liked the way it had a direct view of the sky, and the was no one way there to bother him, or worry him. he almost wished that life could be like this always, no worries, just tranquility and calm. but it wasnt. and there was really nothing he could do.
his mind drifted back to warm nights with jimin, muscular arms around his thin waist and an angelic voice in his ears. he missed those times, the times when they were together. yoongi tried not to think about it too much, in fear that it would start to hurt again, the loss. so he pushed the thoughts from his mind, eyes drifting back to the crisp white page sitting on his lap. he had started, but no more than one word was written down so far; maybe.
"jimin." his mother called to him from the doorway leading to the roof. jimin broke his gaze, turning quickly to look at her instead. "yeah?" he called back, though his voice was gentler. she smiled softly at him, his mother was a sweet lady, "would you like dinner, baby?" she asked him, voice now taking on the same gentle tone jimins had possessed. he paused for a moment, "i'll be down soon, okay?" he answered finally. his mother nodded, smiling once more before turning away. jimin loved his mother, so much. but her arms, just didnt feel like his had.
it was nearly the morning, yoongi could see the first few rays of the sun rise coming in. jimin always loved these, he constantly used to drag yoongi out in the early hours of the morning to see them. as he rested his tired eyes on the light shades of orange and pink, he started to hear something. it was not something around him, but instead in his head. it was a beat. he finally got it. he knew what he wanted his song to sound like. he didnt know where it came from, but it did. for the millionth time that night, he looked at the blank sheet of paper, but this time, he knew what to write.
once he saw the first signs of the sun rise come in to view, he walked down to eat with his mother. he didnt like the sun rise much anymore. it reminded him of painful memories, ones he would not like to think about any time soon. so he dragged his body to his apartment, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes and sitting down with his mother, as she explained what time she would be back from work tonight. nights like these were when he really missed him, the nights when his mother said she would be back early, but he knew she wouldnt.
jimin sat alone in his apartment, headphones jammed in his ears as loud tunes flowed to his head. it wasnt just any song, though. it was their song. jimin hadnt listened to it in a very, very long time. but he refused to let his tears fall as the lyrics yoongi had wrote for him, for them, were heard. its beautiful, he thought to himself, did he really feel this way? does he still feel this way? his thoughts said through the music. and once again, he came up with, probably not. it took a long time for jimin to come to terms with the thought of them not being together. and he still secretly hopes, that every time his front door opens, it would be him.
as he looked up again at what was now the last rays of the sun rise turning in to the first rays of the day, he finally had something substantial written down. it was far from finished, actually, he wasnt even sure how he would make it in to lyrics quite yet. but he did have something to go off on, and that was more than he'd had in weeks. he convinced himself that he didnt know how he came up with it, but he knew somewhere deep, deep down, that it was about jimin.
maybe it was because i love him, or the way he loved me, or even in the way that his hand had fit into mine. but the way he smiled, to me, made even the bright city lights of Seoul and the sparkling star filled sky above, seem dim in comparison.
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a/n hey lovelys! i was feeling a bit artsy today, so i decided to whip this up as an apology for the shitty one i put out yesterday! i hope you enjoyed this as much as i enjoyed writing it! and thank you for all the love/support on 40 chapters already! wwoowww!!
lots of loveee, namjoon1994 !
