part 65 // love?

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(a/n....jimin is me. this happened to me and jimin is representing me. just so you know.)


the realization hits him right in the middle of his chest (metaphorically, of course). it was already two-thirty in the morning, jimin had been tossing and turning all night, not stopping up until then for reasons unknown to him. no matter how many times he squeezed his eyes shut, begging for sleep, he just couldnt do it. it was two-thirty four, when he finally knew why. he sprang upright, blankets still covering the bottom half of his body. then, he stared out into the pitch black room, eyes wide. talking to no one in particular, except maybe himself, he shakily whispered; "holy shit, im in love."


jimin scrambled up and out of bed, desperately reaching for his phone. once he grasped it, he did the only thing he could think of; he called taehyung. he sat on the edge of his rather small bed, only the dim light of his bedside lamp illuminating the small room. he tugged on the edge of his shorts (yes, jimin did like wearing tight short-shorts that showed off his ass a little.. just not in public), waiting for taehyung to pick up his call. just when he was about to loose hope, thinking taehyung had just slept through the ringing, a groggy voice filled his ear. "hello?" taehyungs tired morning voice grumbled into the receiver. "tae- i- hi, okay- oh god-" jimin tried to explain himself, falling short with each attempt.


there was shuffling on the other end, as taehyung sat up. "jimin? whats wrong? are you okay?" taehyung then said, more awake now. jimin took a slow breath, trying to gather himself. "i think that- i think that im in love." jimin finally stuttered out, inhaling sharply. taehyung stayed silent for a moment, and jimin could hear his own heartbeat in his ears. "im happy for you, jiminie, but like, why did you call exactly?" taehyung chuckled lightly, bangs flopping into his eyes. jimin said nothing, breath ragged and unsteady. "because your my best friend and i love you." jimin said. but before giving taehyung time to answer him, he spoke again. "how did you know that you loved jeongguk, tae?" 


taehyung didnt really know what to say. it was hard to explain, it always had been. "oh, uhm, i dont- well- okay. i guess, i knew when i finally realized that it didnt matter what was happening around us, no matter what he could ever say or do, i would still love him just the same. he could literally punch me in the face, and i would stand up and say 'wow, i really love you, jeonggukie.' its hard to explain, but thats kinda it. i could never stop loving him, is what i think im trying to say." taehyung finished with a small sigh, hoping that he could help jimin out in any way that he could. "oh," jimin started slowly, "oh god, i think i really am in love, tae." 


taehyung laughed on the other end, he couldnt help it, jimin just sounded so innocent. "good for you, jiminie. do you wanna talk about it?" jimin was going to say that yes, he did kinda want to talk to taehyung about it, but it could wait. he knew that taehyung was tired and he could talk to him any day. "no, thats okay. it can wait, tae. go back to bed." jimin said sincerely, nodding to himself. "okay, love you jiminie, bye." taehyung said in response almost immediately after. "love you too, bye." jimin said quickly, eventually hearing him disconnect.


when he lied back down, not even bothering to get under the blanket, he let his mind drift. the first thing that he thought about was a few days back, when he had been speaking to yoongi in the hall. they were standing so close, that jimin could see all the fading scars, the bumps, the small splotches of acne, everything on his face. and as he thought back on it now, yoongi looks even more beautiful when you can see the flaws. 


"damn," jimin whispered into the open air, "love is some weird shit."


but as he let his mind drift farther, into places he didnt like to think about often, everything began to fall apart. "oh," jimin started again, only this time with tears falling down his face, and no one here to listen to the pain in his quiet voice, "oh, yeah. but hes in love with somebody else."


//


a/n yeah okei so yeah jimin is me 

lots of love, namjoon1994 !





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