Help Me | Chpt 40

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Hello

Enjoy~

Lance's POV

(Y/n) wasn't there the next day. The seat next to me in Charms remained empty and untouched. She wasn't in the next class. Or the next.

After school I looked for her.

She wasn't on the Quidditch field or with Professor Alfor. She wasn't in the gym or the library. She had just up and disappeared. I talked to Pidge, who didn't seem to know anything about last night.

"Hey have you seen (y/n)?"

"I hardly do anymore. What makes you think I do?" She seemed bitter about the whole thing, as she misses (y/n) as much as or maybe even more than I do.

I asked just about everyone, until I finally found the answer I was looking for.

"She's in the nurse's office," Allura said,  pointing me in that direction.

"Why?"

"This morning she was so violently sick, I had to take her down there," she said. I furrowed my eyebrows, but thanked her and headed towards the nurse's office. Maybe I wouldn't apologize or talk just yet, but I wanted to see if she was okay.

"She's in a bed on the right, you'll see her. Hard to miss," the nurse said.

"What's wrong with her?"

"Poor girl wouldn't stop throwing up. I thought it was puking pastels at first, but it just seems like she's been overworked is all. Right now I think she's sleeping, seeing as I forced her to. From the looks of it she hasn't slept very much lately."

I felt my stomach drop and I thanked the nurse. Most of the beds were empty, and I traveled along the rows until I came across a curtain. I glanced around. (Y/n) was sleeping peacefully, a bucket next to her bed. She looked awful and I hated to say it, but I just sat down on a stool beside her cot, looking down at her face.

She seemed okay, besides the soft sweat dripping down her forehead and her ghostly appearance. I watched her forehead crunch, an uncomfortable look on her face before it turned back to normal. She must be having an unpleasant dream, probably the reason behind her lack of sleep. Her hair had been tied back loosely by the nurse, and I smoothed it away from her face, a couple of sweaty strands unsticking from her face. Her face scrunched up again, this time so much more painful than the first and she shifted.

She seemed to almost be fever dreaming, and had ignored the obvious symptoms until she couldn't any longer. She had to quit this competition. Pick someone else. Her hand wrenched against the bed sheet and her breathing picked up.

"(Y/n)?" I gentle shook her, trying to break her away from the nightmare. She curled up into herself, whimpering, and I shook her a little bit harder. "(Y/n) get up."

Her eyes shot open and her body followed, as she let out a shaky breath, glancing around. She seemed fearful and upset, almost to the point of crying. She shut her eyes for a moment, searching around for the closet thing, which happened to be me, and wrapped her arm around my torso, laying half on the bed and half on my lap.

"Make it stop." She said softly. I placed a hand on her back, stroking it gently. I had no other idea what to do. Her hands gripped at the back of my shirt, and I ran my hand along her hair. After a few moments I felt her body relax and her trembling stop.

"(Y/n)?" I picked her upper body up from my lap, setting her back against the bed and she looked over at me. "Have these nightmares been keeping you from sleeping?"

She gave a tiny nod, playing with her hands and in the moment I forgot about what we talked about yesterday. I didn't care about talking about it.

"What are they about?"

"Every time I try to compete I die, and that's when I wake up. I just keep seeing my dad's disappointed face," she murmured, wiping the sweat away from her forehead with the back of her hand.

"(Y/n), I know you don't want to hear this, but working yourself to death like this isn't the answer. You're pushing yourself away from your friends and giving yourself nightmares, and your body can't hand the physical and emotional stress. So you either need to quit this, or think of a better way to train, because I know that I certainly won't watch you do this to yourself."

She watched me intently as I spoke, eyes purple and tired. I finished my small lecture and she nodded. Her hands stopped fiddling in her lap.

"Is that your way of telling me 'I told you so'?" She asked, smiling weakly up at me. My eyes widened at her response. "That was a joke."

"I know."

"Okay so I'm just not funny, got it," she said. "Look, I don't like throwing my guts up, I don't think anybody really does. And I feel miserable all the time. I just...I don't know why I can't stop. I can't let my dad down. I have to keep from getting myself harmed or killed, and if I do, then I guess it's a guilty after life. I know I have to stop, but I don't know how to do this the right way. I need help, and I'm sorry for what I said yesterday. Something inside me just snapped, and considering you found me here you must've went looking for me today after school, so thanks."

"It's no problem."

This was my chance. We were talking about yesterday. I could ask her if she liked me and get this all cleared up. I know she didn't, but I wanted to know if she felt uncomfortable with me and Nyma around, just because she somehow got roped into this all. I was just considering all the options here.

"Maybe you can help me."

"What?"

"You're a really good athlete, and you know how to train physically without, you know, ending up face first into a bucket," she said. "Pidge can help me with my academics, and I'll still spend time after school with the magical creatures, but I promise I'll take it easy."

Now that confused me. If she felt so uncomfortable around us, then why ask for my help.

"I can't do that."

"Why not?"

"There's so many better athletes and you should talk to your coach instead," I said, continuing to dig my grave.

"But, they won't watch me and make sure I take care of myself like you would," she said.

"Look, I can't, I'm busy. You can watch after yourself," I said. She furrowed her eyebrows, suddenly upset. The moment had passed. I would not be able to ask her. Not after either.

"Okay fine. You can go now," she said, wringing her hands again. She seemed upset rather than mad, and I didn't want to think she'd cry after I left, but I just got up and walked away, feeling like an idiot.

Why was everything about her so complicated to me?



~Calymari

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