"Hello?" Pt. 2

August 25th 2016

"Do you ever wish I was maybe more spontaneous?"

"Where's this coming from?"

"My client this morning is divorcing her husband because he isn't spontaneous enough for her. He doesn't surprise her and he doesn't show her he loves her enough, so she's divorcing him."

"..."

"Wait, I'm not spontaneous enough for you?"

"I didn't say that."

"You didn't say anything."

"Your point?"

"Some people say a lot when they don't say anything at all."

"You're spontaneous enough for me."

"I'm boring. Admit it."

"You're boring."

"Thanks."

"But I'm crazy so we balance each other out. You make me a little boring and I make you a little crazier. See, balanced."

"Ok, but what about the surprises? Do you want me to buy you flowers more often?"

"..."

"No, you're allergic to flowers. What about chocolates? Do you want me to send chocolates?"

"Not really. Any chocolates I ever have around me, Jasmine ends up eating them."

"You give them to her?"

"Give? No. She steals them from me."

"And she called you a kleptomaniac."

"I know, right!"

"So, no to the flowers and chocolates. What about jewellery?"

"I don't need jewellery."

"You're so stubborn. Ok, do I at least show you that I love you?"

"Um..."

"Now I know you're just joking."

"Ture, I am."

"So, you wouldn't divorce me for not being spontaneous enough, for not surprising you enough and not telling you enough that I love you?"

"Nope. You proposed to me after bailing me out of a cell. You surprise me every time you call me because my heart skips a beat. And you tell me every day that you love me, so, no. Not divorcing you for any reason."

"Good to know. Now, Jasmine is coming here this weekend. I'm guessing it's because it's the Bank Holiday weekend. What do you have planned? You're not coming home, too, are you?"

"Sorry, I'm not. I've still got a lot of stuff to sort through before I get the removers in."

"Removers?"

"In a couple of weeks, I'll need to get all my things boxed up and shipped back to London. So, I need to get a head start on it."

"Without Jasmine?!" 

"Shut up. I am perfectly capable of packing. I managed to do it when I left London, so I can do it when I leave New York."

"Send me some photos. If I don't see photographic proof, it never happened."

"You want me to take a selfie of me sifting through my belongings?"

"Yep, that's right."

"You have weird fetishes, Daniel."

"My only fetish is for dark haired, Irish-French spectacularly sarcastic women."

"Sounds like an impossible find."

"Tell me about it. It only took me about thirty-one years to find her."

"You shouldn't let her go, then."

"Trust me I don't plan on it. You see, I asked her to marry me, so I can't exactly let her go, can I?"

"I guess not. It's a good thing you put a ring on it."

"On what?"

"On your woman."

"I don't think she'd appreciate being called anyone's 'woman.' She's very independent and would hate to be considered anyone's property. See, she's pretty powerful on her own without needing any man."

"Yep, she's definitely a catch."

"Indeed. I am a lucky man."

"And is she a lucky girl?"

"I don't know. Is she?"

"Well..."

"Liar."

"Haha. Yeah, I'm a lucky girl."

"Yes, you are."

<<Boss!>>

"Crap, I have to go."

"Ok. I'll speak to you tomorrow. I love you."

"I love you too. Bye."

<<Boss! Jesus Christ, will you hang up the ph->>