"Hello?" Pt. 2

November 15th 2016

"You know, you're a very beautiful woman."

"... Ok?"

"Which is why this is confusing."

"Huh?"

"Your baby photos."

"Where did you get my baby photos?"

"I was unpacking your new study because that's the type of dutiful fiancé I am and I came across some photo albums of you as a child. I must say, you were hideous."

"Excuse me?"

"You were an ugly baby."

"..."

"I mean that in the nicest way. Now look at you! You're a swan."

"And before I was an ugly duckling."

"Exactly. I was afraid that you wouldn't understand."

"Oh, I understand."

"Great."

"I understand that you no longer want me to bring you Charlotte's lovely desserts home. I understand that the La Perla lingerie set that I wore last night is never seeing the light of day ever again. I understand that you have a certain death with-"

"I'm starting to get the feeling that you didn't quite understand my meaning after all."

"Oh, I didn't?"

"I think you took it as an insult."

"Why would I do that? Doesn't every girl dream of being called ugly?"

"..."

"..."

"Well, when you put it like that..."

"Daniel?"

"Yes?"

"Put the photo albums away, get out of my study and stop rifling through my stuff."

"Ok."

"And you better have wine and cheesecake ready for me by the time I get home. There will be grovelling tonight, Whitaker."

"Naturally. Is there anything else I can do to make it up to you?"

"No, that's all for now."

"I'll have all that ready by... what time are you home?"

"I'm not sure. I may be home in the next thirty minutes. Maybe in an hour. Perhaps in five hours."

"-Evelyn! Can you go to Charlotte's shop and get cheesecake, please?-"

<<What flavour?>>

"-Any.- Any flavour, Soph?"

"No. I want a particular flavour."

"Ok, which?"

"I'm not telling you."

"Huh. -Evie, get one of everyone Charlotte has! Oh, and there needs to be wine. Get a bottle of Riesling or Pinot Noir. And Muscat. Thank you!- Please don't come home in the next forty minutes."

"Damn it. I was just around the corner, too."

"..."

"..."

"No, you weren't. You're lying to me."

"You'll never know for sure. I'll be seeing you later. Or sooner than that. Who knows."

"You're torturing me."

"Does that upset you?"

"Slightly."

"Maybe you misunderstood me."

"Ah, I see. Revenge."

"Would I stoop so low?"

"Yes."

"You hurt me, Daniel."

"..."

"Anyway, I'll see you soon, baboon."

"Uh... damn it, I can't even say later, 'gator."

"Nope!"

"Shit..."

"Haha. Bye, babe!"