"Hello?" Pt. 2

November 20th 2016

"Hello?"

"Hi, it's me."

"Whose number are you calling off?"

"Alistair's phone."

"What happened to yours?"

"Oh, you know... Samuel threw it at a wall."

"Oh."

"Yeah, I don't think he's in the right frame of mind at the moment."

"Right... um, uh... I guess I'm his least favourite person at the moment, then."

"Nope. You're close, but you're not the least favourite. That would be Jasmine."

"Yeah, but if it wasn't for me, they would be ok."

"You could look at it that way. Or you could look at it this way- if it weren't for you, my brother would be marrying the she-devil."

"Daniel-"

"What? I think we firmly established last night that Jasmine Gough is a terrible human being."

"She's not a terrible human being."

"I disagree. Let's examine the evidence- she made you choose between her and me. That's not very nice. I am glad, however, that you chose me. Secondly, she totally attacked me for no reason whatsoever-"

"You called her a psychotic bitch."

"What's wrong with that? We call a spade a spade, why not call a psychotic bitch a psychotic bitch?"

"Seriously?"

"Anyway, the biggest reason that she's a terrible human being is, after all that, she still walked out on my brother when Samuel was clearly begging her to stay. She left, Sophie."

"Not ideal, I know, but-"

"Are you honestly sticking up for her over this?"

"No, I'm not, but I can see both sides. It can't have been easy for her- I am pretty horrible when I'm on a mission and if I'd been confronted by me, I'd run away too."

"You'd run away from yourself?"

"Hey, at least I know I'm a bitch. And I'm woman enough to admit it."

"Whatever."

"And it isn't like they broke up. Knowing Jasmine, she's probably holed up in a hotel, cooling off before going home to Samuel. No doubt, she's been calling him all day."

"Maybe. It's difficult to know seeing as Samuel also threw his phone at a wall."

"Perhaps it's an idea that you don;t give him any more phones."

"We haven't. We've been giving him Jack Daniel's instead."

"You mean to say that he's drunk?"

"As a skunk."

"Perfect."

"I don't think your sarcasm is going to be helpful in this situation."

"No, really? Well, fuck me!"

"See! That was unhelpful."

"What are you doing with Samuel?"

"In what sense?"

"Are you taking him back to his house or will he be coming here to sober up until morning?"