The need.

~Chapter 66~

2 month's later

A knock comes from the door and I turn towards it. "Come in," I said. Mack smiled walking in with food. I giggled. "You're creepy," He chuckled.

"Macy made you breakfast," he said. I nodded. He pushed my wheelchair away so he can get through.

"Tell her I said thank you but I'm not hungry," I said. He frowned.

"Lola you need to eat something," he said. I roll my eyes.

"I don't usually eat in the mornings and you both know that," I said. He nodded. He sat at the edge of the bed. I stared at him.

"You ready for today?" he asked. I looked at my hand.

"I'm scared," I said. He put his hand on mine.

"You'll do fine," he said. I smiled softly.

"Thank you," I said. He patted my hand.

"Freya and Derek are on there way. Macy and I have a date to get too. The phone is in reach if you need me." he said. I nodded. He hugged me. "I love you peanut," he said.

"I love you too Mack," I said. He walks out and I look out the window.

After I was released from the hospital I wanted some time away from everything and everyone. Mack let me stay at his house while I was in recovery. People came and went but one person. Shane. I know he won't judge me or anything like that but I lost apart of me I can never get back. I would be lying if I say it wasn't taking a toll on me.

"Why so glum?" I heard my dorky best friend. I look at her. "Want some sunlight?" she asked. I nodded. She moved the wheelchair in front of the bed. I used my upper body strength and lifted myself with her help. As soon as I was in the chair she wheeled me to the back patio where Derek was sitting.

"Hey beautiful," he said. He bent down and gave me a soft hug.

"Hey, Derek," I said.

"How are you feeling?" he asked.

"Like I've been in bed pressed for two months," I said. He chuckled. "How is he?"

"Ask him yourself," he said. I gave him a confused look until footsteps were heard behind me. I closed my eyes and my heart pounded. "We'll be in the next room," Derek said. I heard his and Freya's footsteps walk away and I knew it was just him and I.

"What do you say to the girl you love who's been dodging your calls?" His voice sounded as if he was nervous. I kept my eyes closed. "You mise well open them gorgeous eyes because I'm not walking away until you talk to me." I took a deep breath and opened them.

Shane stood with a white t-shirt and black sweats. He looked like he needed weeks of sleep. But he looked happy. His eyes were just as blue as the ocean. He looked like he just got a fresh hair cut. He looked hot for a man without sleep. I looked down at my hands.

"Mack says your recovery is going better than ever. Are you scared to finally get up and try to walk?" he asked.

"I don't want to hurt myself," I said. He bent down in front of me.

"It's scary at first but you got this. Your stitches were taken out last week so you won't hurt yourself," he said. I started in his eyes. "I can help if you want?"

"You came here to help me walk?" I asked. He gives me a small smile. 

"Yes," he said. I sighed.

"Get Derek," I said. He gave me a small smile and walked into the other room. The three of them walked out and stood by me.

"Take my hand," Derek said holding out his hand. I grabbed it and he began pulling me up slowly. I halfway up but my knees begin to shake. I let go of his hand and fell back.

"I can't," I said. He gives me a small smile.

"Nope, not doing this. Lola Rose Michaelson, you are no quitter. So I suggest you quit this pity party and get off your ass already." Freya said. I was surprised. Derek chuckled.

I sighed and grabbed Derek's hand again. He pulled me up more and my knees began to shake again. But I kept going I stood up completely. Freya moved the wheelchair but I fell backward. Instead of falling to the ground, Shane caught me. He smiled down at me. I gulped. I peeled myself off him and took two steps the railing and leaned on it. They watched me carefully and I looked down at my feet.

"Thanks, guys," I said.

"No problem chica," Freya said. She looked at Derek. "We have some unpacking to do," They walked away and I looked at Shane.

"Well guess my job here is done," he said.

"Why are you here?" I asked. He tucked his hands in his sweat pockets.

"Mack invited me," he said. I nod.

"Of course he did," I said turning my head towards the pond.

"What happened?" he said. I close my eyes.

"Can we not do this?" I said.

"Lola I love you. Whatever is going on we can get through it together. You just have to let me." he said. Tears began forming in my eyes. "Just tell me what happened. So I can fix it,"

"You can't fix it, Shane," I said turning around. "This you can't fix. It's never gonna get better."  He took a step closer to me. "Don't,"

"Just let me try. Please, I beg you," he said. The tears were now running down my cheeks.

"I can't," I said.

"Why?" he asked.

"Because I can't give you want you to want. I can give you kids. I can't give you a family like you deserve Shane." I said. He looked stunned.

"Lola I-."

"Do you want kids of your own?" I asked.

"Lola I-."

"Do you?"

"Will you let me talk?" he asked. I looked into his eyes. "Of course I want kids and want a family. But I don't want any of that unless it's with you. Lola, you're my reason for living."  I turned my head.

"I just can't," I said.

"Give one reason why?" he said. I looked at him.

"Because you deserve so much more then I can give you. You deserve a wife and kids. I am a broken record and being with me will only break you." I said.

"So we'll be broken together." he took one step closer and grabbed my head. "I love you Lola Michealson. I need you in my life or I'll go crazy. If you want a family then we will have one. We can adopt children. We can get a big house. I promise every moment with you will be a gift from God. Just don't make me walk away without you. I can't go through that." I smiled through the tears.

"You're such a cheese ball," I said rolling my eyes. He chuckled. He bent down on one knee. My heartbeat went crazy and the butterflies in my stomach were on overload.

"Will you Lola Michealson be my wife now and forever?" he asked. I nodded without a second thought. He jumped up and kissed me.

"Hey careful with her. She's still fragile." I heard Freya say. I look behind Shane to see Derek and Lola smiling. I giggle.