Deus Didymus: Rend

Pt2Ch31: Invasion IV

Sakura stumbled to her desk, snatching a glass bottle. She downed a handful of pills before turning to her patients. Choi Yujin and Liz's conditions stabilized, but they still required medical attention. Tatsuo slowly deteriorated, but Chaeyeon got worse with each passing second.

If I don't treat them they're going to die. But if I take my attention away from Chaeyeon...

Sakura shook her head. The moment she felt her energy replenish, she rushed back to Chaeyeon's side. Despite shaking her thoughts, her responsibilities and morals clashed. A glaring problem beat at the back of her head, forcing her to refocus every handful of seconds. She could treat Chaeyeon and save her--maybe get her out on the battlefield--but if she did, she was sure everyone but Liz would die.

Alternatively, she could treat everyone else and let Chaeyeon succumb to the wellspring virus. Sakura ran over her possibilities time and time again; no matter what she thought of, someone had to die. Tatsuo is the son of SM's general Kuga Yugo. Yujin is an integral piece to IZLand's foundation and defense. Liz is Minho's sister to which she promised she would keep safe. Chaeyeon is the commander of IZLand. She leads everyone with an iron, but caring fist. She is the most powerful combatant aside from Hana that they have, and lastly, she is her lover.

Is it worth it? Can I live with myself if I save her and let everyone else die? But what will I do--what will IZLand do if she dies? No one else can fill Chaeyeon's spot. Chaeyeon was grooming Minho to become the next commander, but he's still just a kid. She wouldn't want to force that onto Minho while he's young. Moka is better on the front lines, Hana would refuse, Kami is still gone, Yujin has too many responsibilities, Xiaoting is too impatient, Wonyoung is missing... We need Chaeyeon.

Tears dropped from Sakura's face onto Chaeyeon's hands. Motes of Sakura's allele passed from her tears into the commander's skin, revitalizing her hand.

I can't do this... I can't make this choice. Why? Why did they have to invade now? If even another day passed then maybe--I might have been able to save them all with Minho. I can't pull Minho from the front lines! I can't heal! I can't use this stupid mark! I can't fucking do anything!! Why did I go? Why didn't I just listen to Chaeyeon and stay? I could have stopped the outbreak if I stayed. None of this would have happened. Everything would be okay!!

Kyu burst through the office door, holding Hana in his arms. "Doctor! Hana's going to die!!"

Sakura balled her hands into fists. She screamed silently as she sobbed. Tears flowed like rivers onto Chaeyeon's hands; just before she broke, a hand wiped her tears. Chaeyeon smiled weakly, grabbing Sakura's frail wrist.

"Good work. I'll rest now, okay? You should take care of the others."

"I can't..." Sakura sobbed. She shook her head, repeating the two words over and over.

"You can," Chaeyeon assured. "I'll be right here right after you save everyone else. Someone like me would never die to a disease."

"You will!" Sakura wiped her tears. She hovered her hands back over Chaeyeon's stomach, "I can't lose you!!!"

Chaeyeon pushed against Sakura's arm. Her pain-stricken expression stabbed Sakura's heart. "It's okay. Everything will be alright."

Sakura squeezed Chaeyeon's hand. She pressed the back of Chaeyeon's hand against her forehead with a heavy sigh. Sakura bit her quivering lip, shuddering as she took a deep breath. "I'm sorry Chaeyeon. I couldn't pick you back up..."

"It's okay," Chaeyeon smiled. "Go and be a healer. We need you."

Chaeyeon's smile grew as she received a kiss on the forehead. Her smile faded following a deep exhale. Above her stood the ceiling, but above that was a certain person she's been dying to see for the past few years.