Sapphire's Review Store 2.0

Review by Gnome: Soul of Words

Title: Soul of Words

Author: bangtanforever355

Reviewer: GnomeMercy

Summary: 3/5

Your summary is looking great, however I think it does need to mention that this is a poetry collection so that readers know what they're in for.

I also noticed a grammar error in this sentence:

"Words can be erased, removed, forgotten about.
There soul is eternal "

Firstly, there's no need for the space between the word "eternal" and the speech mark—and speech should always end with punctuation, too. Also, you used the wrong "there". "There" means something that, for example, is "over there". The "there" you're supposed to use in this case is "their". (There is also "they're" which is an abbreviation for "they are".) I suggest you change it to:

"Words can be erased, removed, forgotten about.
Their soul is eternal."

Grammar: 3/5

When it comes to poetry, grammar is pretty complicated as rules are bent a bit. I think you had some trouble with this, and I'll point out some errors with grammar that you had.

In Moonchild's Singularity I noticed these:

"Who are you? " I asked the fairest.

And also:

"You don't have to pretend
And present me a smile, so fake
You can trust me
And show me all your pain"

In the first example there's no need for the space between the question mark and the speech mark, and in the second example, the speech needs to end with punctuation (I recommend a period). In the last verse of the poem, I also noticed a similar error. (This was recurring in pretty much all your poems.) I suggest changing it to:

"You don't have to pretend
And present me a smile so fake
You can trust me
And show me all your pain."

There was a small typo (in Dark Panacea) when there was an unnecessary space between the words and question mark:

Until my death is not near ?

This one is from Destiny of Sins (Rain Trilogy: 1):

"From where did you came from? "

I've already mentioned the typo, but "came" is in the wrong tense. It should be:

"From where did you come from?"

Or, since "from" is repeated twice:

"Where did you come from?"

Overall, you do have some typos and grammatical errors (which can be solved by an edit—or even reading aloud if you're not sure that a comma is supposed to be in a certain place), but these are easy to fix.

Diction + Figurative Language: 3.5/5

Each poem had wonderful use of literary devices. I loved the use of metaphors especially, and Moonchild's Singularity was my absolute favourite (that ending was extremely powerful). If I had to be a bit picky, I would say that you might want to be careful of being a bit "flowery" when it comes to poetry.—your poems are lovely as they are, but it can be a bit too descriptive and the overuse of complicated words can take away meaning from your poems.

This is just a suggestion, of course, I think your poems are lovely as they are!

Message Conveyed: 5/5

Quite possibly your strongest point. I adored each and every message you had in your poems. I think they were meaningful and had power, so, in that sense, well done! I don't have much to say here, just that you clearly know what you want to talk about, and you know the message you want to give!

Emotions Evoked: 4/5

Some poems didn't resonate with me as much, but some were extremely powerful. These poems obviously are very meaningful and are packed with emotion. I think in these aspects you really shine as you know what you want to show and your words are powerful, too. There isn't much I can say here, either, because you've got this part down! Of course, meanings do differ from person to person, and so do how much a poem means to someone, but I liked yours. (Just keep a look out on being a bit too flowery as mentioned in Diction + Figurative Language.)

OVERALL SCORE: 18.5/25

Overall, you have some lovely poems that show so much potential when it comes to poetry. I suggest you clean up some of the typos (this can be done with a quick edit), but, in general, you have some lovely poems! Well done! I hope this helps.