Loki and Sigyn, His Glorious Purpose

Chapter Thirty-Eight

Loki was quick to leave breakfast with Hela swung on his hip. Off to teach her magic, he had told me. However, I knew that he was truly trying to just get away from Thor.

"Did I do something wrong?" the God of Thunder asked as he helped me clear the table.

"No," I said, "You know how he is."

Thor nodded, "I suppose I forgot how sensitive he is."

"He's not sensitive," I said as I stacked up plates, "Loki's been on such a great streak, you know."

Thor looked at me with a curious glance and asked, "What do you mean?"

"He's been genuinely happy, Thor. He's not the same man you saw die six years ago," I explained gently sweeping crumbs off the table, "He's worked so hard on himself. You should respect him for that."

Thor laughed, "How much could he truly change?"

I pursed my lips and grit my teeth before swiftly turning to Thor.

"You don't even know him, Thor. You never have. For once in your life can't you recognize all the good he's done rather than just focus on the bad?"

"Well, there's a lot of bad to focus on," Thor said, "But I suppose you're right, he is my brother."

"There's a lot of bad in all people," I corrected him, "Even in you, even in me, it's unfair to define a person through what they've done in the past. Like, I said, Loki has changed a lot."

Thor paused for a moment, seeming to think over what I said as he carried a heap of plates to the kitchen window.

I sighed, "You don't have to understand, but just give him a chance?"

"Sigyn," he said, his voice lowering, "He may have changed but he's still a murderer."

I clenched my jaw. There he went, swinging that word about. 

"And you aren't?" I challenged, "How many lives have you ended? Parading around as a hero. You kill the jotun like they're cattle. And who even knows how many have died with you gallivanting about with the-the what are they called? Avengers? Everyone had blood on their hands, Thor. Even you."

"Even you?" he shot back.

"Even me, Thor," I said with a brief laugh, "You barely know your brother and you don't know me at all. It'd serve you well to learn a little more about your family in the brief time you're here."

Everyone had blood on their hands in one way or another. Whether or not they intended it to be that way or to varied from person to person. I had more in my ledger than I cared to admit, I doubt anyone truly knew the extent of it. Thor truly had a lot to learn about me, but I couldn't blame the man. We may have met a total of five times. However, I felt as though he had to try and give Loki the time of day. I had seven sisters and was able to accomplish that with the entire lot of them. Thor had no exception. 

Over the last six years, I had no doubt seen a dramatic change in Loki. There were aspects of his character that remained the same such as his trickster nature, his thirst for attention, his flare for the dramatics, and so on. However, due to his dedication to improving himself, he had changed for the better. Genuinely, Loki had become much softer due to his newfound self-confidence. Additionally, he worked hard to get through his traumas, a feat I often still failed at. He had also made a great father. He was so kind to Hela, never raising his voice at her but truly loving her. I was very proud of him for all of this and more. 

After cleaning up, I offered my arm to Thor.

"Walk with me to the gardens?"

He nodded, hooking his arm into mine.

"Did you enjoy your time on Midgard?" I asked as we walked through the palace halls.

"Yes," Thor said, "I did. I fought a lot of things, aliens, robots, but I made friends along the way."

"Your friends are the avengers, right?"

"Yes, except we're on a little bit of a break right now," he explained, "There was a bit of a disagreement between two of them."

"I see, that's what really brought you back to Asgard, isn't it?" I asked, looking up at him.

"You seem to see right through me," he said with a soft chuckle, "That's just half of the reason I'm here, aside from the whole Asgardian enemy situation."

"Homesick, were you?"

"Very much so," he admitted.

"I understand," I said, "But do you like Midgard?"

"I do, but it's nothing like Asgard."

"So I've heard."

As I walked with Thor, I realized that he loved to talk about himself, just like Loki. Spending time with Thor, I was able to instantly pick up on the similarities between the two. Thor and Loki were both little boys just desperate for praise and attention. I understood why. Growing up with Odin, master of all nine realms, as your father was no easy shadow to live in. So desperately, the two of them just wanted to be liked. They just went about it in very different ways. Loki embraced this quality in himself, understanding it as insecurity and doing everything in his power to go against this nature. Thor simply denied it. The brothers were truly two sides of the same coin.

Walking into the gardens, we were able to catch a secretive glimpse of Loki and Hela. My husband had our daughter on his lap as he allowed her to experiment with her powers. He encouraged good posture and consistently reminded her to keep her chin up.

Thor smiled as he looked on. I could tell he was somewhat surprised by this side of Loki. I wondered if he had ever seen Loki so happy, so calm. We stayed there for quite a while, watching on in silence as we observed their little lesson.

"Sigyn," Thor said softly, "May I ask you a question?"

"Yes, of course."

"How do you have blood on your hands?"