Loki and Sigyn, His Glorious Purpose

Chapter Ninety-One

LOKI'S POINT OF VIEW
Sigyn was more beautiful than I could have ever fathomed. The videos and illusions simply didn't do her justice. Everything about her seemed unreal as if she were a living doll. Her skin was soft and smooth, there was not a single blemish across her face. Her freckles glinted in the sunlight as if they were specks of pure gold. Her eyes, her lips, her tiny waist, all of it was true perfection. So desperately I longed for her touch, her love, and for her.

Seeing her for the first time was like a breath of fresh air. That feeling of emptiness I had felt for my entire life was finally filled as I looked at her. I knew instantly upon beholding her that this was my Sigyn, my bride. I knew it stronger than anything I had ever known before. And yet, I felt jealousy. Jealousy towards myself. This was the first time I had ever beheld her, and yet there had already been a version of me who had lived and died beside her. That version of myself was able to love her and truly know her. But I didn't get that chance. 

"You were dead," Sigyn stammered, snapping me out of my daze. Tears brimmed her icy blue eyes as she looked at me. Her breath caught in her throat and I could tell she was scared.

"I was," I affirmed, gently taking her hands in mine. I didn't know what to say, or how to speak to her. I didn't want to make her afraid and I certainly did not want to ruin. whatever we may have.

"How are you here?" she asked hastily, examining me thoroughly. As a mother would, she turned me around and checked for any injuries. She had absolutely no regard for modesty as she pulled up my shirt and looked me over to see if I was hurt. Sigyn's warm hands against my skin sent shivers down my spine, it was becoming increasingly hard to concentrate.

Facing me towards her once again she quickly asked, "Are you a ghost?"

"Not a ghost," I assured her, "I'm all flesh and blood, dear."

"Then how-" she began, before her eyes widened, "Christ, is this black magic? Did Hela do this? How are you here?"

I could tell her mind was reeling at a million miles per minute. Having known her for all of two minutes now, I was already able to pick up on so much of her being. I could tell she was scared and confused yet simultaneously relieved and mystified. Sigyn's heart was beating out of her chest, I could almost hear its thumping. 

"I um...I," I stammered, trying to think of how to explain this all to her, "I didn't really um die you see, when I was killed by Thanos it was all a trick and so here I am."

I figured this lie would be better suited to her ears than the truth of it all. besides, Best not to explain that I'm actually not her Loki. I was sure that explicit details of the TVA and whatnot may be a little confusing, perhaps even offputting. I figured it was best to ease her fear with a lie. However, this was far from the case. As soon as I uttered my lie, all specks of joy disappeared immediately. Sigyn's face fell cold and angry.

"Why are you lying to me?" she asked sternly. Her eyes narrowed as she looked at me fiercely.

I blinked in absolute disbelief at her ability to see right through me. I was the God of Lies and yet here she was, cutting through them like nothing.

"How did you know-" I attempted, my brows furrowing as I attempted to understand her powerful intuition.

"How did I know?" she asked, stepping away from me cautiously, "We were married for nearly a decade, if anyone knows what you look like when you lie it's me. You know that though...you never lied to me. You knew I would know..."

"Sigyn, listen to me," I attempted.

"No," she interrupted, shaking her head, "I would've known if you were alive. I always knew."

Sigyn swiftly took my left hand, examining it with my palm facing upwards. Beside it, she held her own left hand, obviously comparing the two. As I watched, I noticed a large scar that trailed down the center of her palm. Her entire demeanor shifted, her shoulders relaxed completely and her face twisted into a look of pure confusion. 

"You...you don't have the scar from our handfasting. From when we were married," she said softly, looking up at me, "You aren't my husband, are you?"

I shook my head sadly, "No...not really. But I am Loki. Dear, I am him but from a different time."

She looked at me suspiciously as she chided cautiously, "Go on."

I took a deep breath before explaining it all to her. Beginning from the exact moment of the tesseract to all the time I spent in the TVA. I told her absolutely everything, not holding back a single detail. All the while, she listened intently. She didn't interrupt at all but rather focussed on my every word. I was terrified of what she would do, how she may react. She was right. I wasn't her husband. Nor was I truly Hela's father. But I wanted nothing more than to be those things. 

"And now I'm here," I concluded with a sigh. 

"And now you're here,"  she echoed as she gently cupped my face. Sigyn's brows furrowed as she looked up at me, her eyes were pained and fearful. I knew she understood all of what I said but I also knew how difficult it must be to take it all in.

"I've missed you so much," she said quietly as steady tears began to drip down her cheeks. She laughed lightly through her tears as she took her touch away from me. 

"I suppose I should apologize," she said softly, "I've been a little forward with you. Um... I...this is the first time you've ever seen me?"

I nodded. She squeezed her eyes shut and took a deep breath as she continued, "You don't really know who I am then, do you?"

"I know you're Sigyn, meant to be my bride and the mother of my child," I said softly, gently wiping the tears from her face, "And I know this is hard for you. But dear god, I just want to be yours. I've fought my way through time and space to be at your side. And you're right, I don't know you. But what I do know is that I want nothing more than to know you."