The Quotes Book

41

1'is Jeff Bezos a furry?'
2'12'
1'Correct!'

1'he has tiny boobs'
2'yum'

1'boobies'
2'better make use of them while they're still there'

1'shriveled balls'
2'sure'

1'i like your hair!'
2*bursts into tears'

1'i love bursting into hair'

1'big dick tea'
1'STOP ADDING THINGS I SAY TO A BLOODY QUOTES BOOK'

1'go chicken nugget yourself'

1'i was practising my moon walking hee hee'

1'i dont want to snort the earlobe'
2'do not snorp the earphones'

1'GET YOUR EARLOBES! TWO FOR A POUND!'

1'i think you snorted the baby villagers'
2'fair enough, they were ugly anyway'

1'tiny dicknals'

1'i have three moods. I'm going to fuck someone, I'm going to kill someone, and I'm going to kill myself'
1'sometimes it's all three'

1'hey, uh... can I order, uh, death?'
2'sir, this is a Wendy's'
1'...'
1'i'll try at subway-'

1'hypothetically, if you got magnetic power, baked it into the cake, and neither the cake nor the oven explodes, would the cake be magnetic?'
2'why do you want to know this???'
3'ITS GENUINELY A GOOD QUESTION-'

1'my gnome is sentient and communicates through making me hallucinate'
2'are you on drugs?'
1'i mean, I'm high on adrenaline, BUT I SWEAR HE'S ALIVE,  HE SHOWED ME THIS NEW SPIDER-'

1'you're caressing my shoulder'

1'ok but hear me out... Zombie Apocalypse... But everyone starts speaking in UwU'
2'Rawr bwains XD'
3'UwU it bit me oh noes'
1'Doctow I fink I'm tuwning into a zombie OwO'
4'I will burst out crying'

1'you need to stop taking and looking at pictures if yourself and saying "yass"'
2'Oh but see thsts where you're wrong'
2*adds more to self esteem in physical appearance*

1'I just read the words "his eyes were moist" and I dont think I'm ever going to cry again'
2'who the fuck describes crying as moist eyes???'
1'wattpad. Wattpad does.'
2'bro I'm just not really feeling good tonight my eyes are honestly moist bro'
3*wheezing*

1'Yooo my gurl Rachel!!'
2'Wassup davince'
1'Nothin just came to give you ma fucking ear'
2'Your wha-'
1'MY FUCKING EAR'

1'i think you're trying to gaslight me...'
1'but can you gatekeep and girl boss? That is the true question'

1*crying*
1'basslight. Malejeep. Birlhoss'
2'grass height. Male sheep. Birth loss'
3*visible pain*

1'springtrap is just prince Philip's fursuit'
2'stop'
1'he would disintegrate if he listened to Hamilton'

1'SHE WAS STARING AT MY DICK!'
2'you don't have a dick'
1'oh yeah...'

1'being the therapist friend is just slowly gaining more and more anxiety and trauma off of the word 'goodbye'

1'sorry I cant concentrate, theres hallucinations yelling "WHASSAH DUDE" at me from across the room'