Suffering Part 2

Cannot or Will Not

A couple of weeks later, while Severus was at school, Y/N had some errands to run. She needed to go to Gringotts to exchange some galleons for British pounds. She apparated to Diagon Alley, but something was off. Wizards and witches were running in all directions. Y/N ducted down a small alleyway to see what was happening. 

She noticed several of the shops had been set on fire. Just then, a group of Death Eaters walked down the street. They must have been the ones behind the chaos. Y/N knew she needed to hide but she wanted a better look. 

Suddenly, one of the Death Eaters noticed her. The person stood looking at her as if they recognized her. Their eyes locked but she couldn’t determine who it was. It wasn’t Severus, that was for sure. Y/N decided to get out of there quickly. She apparated back to the cottage with a quickness that threw her to the floor. One thing was for sure, she needed to talk to Severus.

She scribbled a note on parchment and ran to her owl to deliver it. Her thoughts were everywhere. She started to wonder if she would become a target because she had been recognized. Suddenly, she left the cottage again. 

Severus had temporarily been appointed Headmaster of Hogwarts since the death of Dumbledore. He sat behind the desk scribbling something on parchment when an owl came to the window and pecked at it. He rose from the desk to retrieve the letter. Quickly, he opened the letter. It read, “Our spot 3pm”. 

The letter had made it just in time. He thought of the rocks near the water, the lake itself, the feeling of the grass under his feet. He saw himself standing there. Suddenly, he appeared there, spotting Y/N sitting on a rock visibly upset.

“What is going on?” he demanded. “The Death Eaters were in Diagon Alley today. They were..” she spoke with a shaky voice. “Were you spotted?!” he spat in a clearly angry tone. “One of them saw me. I don’t know who it was though,” she shakily announced. “What were you doing there in the first place?” he shouted. “I was going to Gringotts of course. How could I know what was happening?” she spat back at him.

“I want you to go get your things and go to the village, now,” he demanded in a raised voice. “Come with me,” she begged. “Don’t be foolish, you know I cannot. I have to stay at the school,” he scoffed. “Severus, I’m getting scared something is going to happen to you. This is getting out of hand,” she begged. 

“You will go to the village as I instructed,” he spat back at her. “If you love me, come with me,” she begged again. “Do what I told you, now,” he sneered as he moved closer to her. It suddenly dawned on Y/N. Everything was clear in her mind. “You will never choose me, will you? Your loyalties will never lie with our marriage,” Y/N said with a solemn tone. 

“Stop this nonsense right now. You are forcing me to lose my temper. Do as I told you,” he yelled back at her. Y/N stood with a heartbroken look on her face. He turned around for a moment to gather his composure. When he turned back around, Y/N had drawn her wand at him. “Do not take a step forward, I am warning you,” she demanded. 

“Put your wand down, NOW,” he yelled at her. “You are done forcing me to do things. If I leave, do not come to get me. I will not watch you die for a school or an Order who care nothing for you. I have given you everything but you still won’t choose me. I will ask one more time, will you come with me?” she said as tears rolled down her face. “I cannot,” he said with tears in his eyes.

“You will not,” she spoke with devastation in her eyes. She thought of the village in Wales, the green rolling hills, the little cottages with thatched roofs, the stone buildings, and suddenly she appeared there, throwing herself onto the ground. 

Y/N was on the ground, shaking. A few witches and wizards had seen her appear and started to whisper. This was one of the only places he could not find her. She got up from the ground, dusting herself off. She made her way to the end of the village, continuing to walk the trail until she was out of sight of the village. 

There was a small stream off the path and she went to sit beside it to gather her thoughts. She would obviously have to go back for Alfie that night. A big part of her was terrified that Severus would be there waiting for her. It was getting dark after a bit. Her wand was still in her hand in case he was there to stop her. 

She thought of the wooden beams, the stone fireplace, the windows on either side of the room, the well loved furniture. She saw herself standing there. Once she appeared, the room was dark and quiet. She flicked the lights with her hand, no one was there. She went upstairs to look for the cat but he was nowhere to be found. 

Y/N threw everything she could into her expanding bag and went back down stairs. There was a note she finally saw. It read, “I have Alfie. Will you be brave enough to come retrieve him from my chambers at Hogwarts? We shall see.” 

Along with the hurt she was already feeling, she was now furious. The man kidnapped her cat in order to make her meet with him. She couldn’t apparate that far but she could use the floo. She took out some powder, tossing it into the fireplace, “Headmasters Chambers, Hogwarts.” 

Quickly, she was sucked through, landing on the carpet beside the fireplace. Severus was sitting on the sofa next to Alfie who was asleep. Y/N took out her wand. “Do not even think about it,” he spat. “I’m going to clean myself,” she said firmly. She did so with a swish of her wand. “Give me my cat, you bastard,” she demanded. “Take him. For all I know you abandoned him,” he scoffed. “You know I did not. If I come to pick him up, do not touch me,” she demanded.

 “Take your cat and run away,” he said looking back at his book. Y/N carefully moved forward to grab Alfie and place him back in the carrying bag. “Will you do something for me, atleast?” she asked, picking up the bag.

“What is that?” he sneered. “Promise you will not come to get me. That’s all I ask,” she said firmly. “Leave,” he spat. Y/N thought of the village in Scotland. She was close enough now to get there. She thought of the pointy wooden buildings, the street, the Inn, the pub down the street. She pictured herself standing there. 

Suddenly she was pulled there, landing outside the Inn. She opened the door to go inside. “OH deary we have missed your face,” the excited short round Innkeeper spoke. It actually brought a smile to her face. “Oh thank you. I need a room again. I’m not sure how long I will be here this time,” she spoke with an air of sadness. 

“Oh deary, yes of course. Cillian will be pleased to see you. You can have the same room again,” she said, taking the money from Y/N and handing over the keys. “Thank you, Miss,” Y/N said, trying to hold it together until she made it to the room.

Y/N climbed the stairs, unlocking the familiar door. She switched the lights on as tears started streaming down her face. Unzipping the bag, she let out the beautiful black cat. She threw herself onto the bed, with her coat and shoes on. She could no longer restrain herself. In her eyes, her marriage was over. She would not stay to see him take his last breath.