Suffering Part 2

Stargazing Again

Content warning: Mental health, sex, drugs

The two were getting dressed again when Severus remarked, “I take it that was not a punishment.” Y/N just chuckled to herself, trying to hide her embarrassment. “No, it was not. I think that is just something I like now. I thought you were going to spank me or something but when you just left me there. I lost it,” she confessed. “So I saw,” he remarked as he buttoned his shirt again, tucking it into his trousers.

“Did you enjoy any of it? Or are you disappointed it didn’t work?” she asked curiously. Severus smirked and moved closer to her, taking her face in his hands, “I enjoyed it very much. I will have to come up with something less fun for you,” he said, kissing her softly.

“Perhaps after dinner I can quickly go to the cottage to retrieve something, to relax us? We could lay under the stars. How lovely would that be?” she asked hopefully.

 “Perhaps,” he said unenthusiastically. “Please, Daddy, please, please, it will be fun to relax under the stars,” she wrapped her arms around his neck in a ploy to lure him in. 

“Ok, Princess. You make it difficult to say no to sometimes,” he remarked, wrapping his arms around her. Y/N’s face lit up with joy when she heard that. 

After dinner, YN went to the cottage just for a minute to grab something from the wooden box on the mantle. She quickly returned to the house and the two went outside.

 Severus laid out a blanket for them to lay on together. “You are the best,” she announced as she lit their joint with a match. After it was lit, she extinguished the match and tossed it in the grass. “Hardly appropriate behavior for a Headmaster and a Professor,” he remarked looking over at Y/N who was currently holding in the hit from the joint. 

She turned her head, blowing it away from Severus, and handed him the joint. “We are still adults. We are allowed to have fun. It’s not like we are at school,” she responded. Severus took his hit before handing it back to her. Y/N announced, “You won’t believe how good it feels when I suck your dick when you're high.” 

Severus started choking at her comment, then covering his face with his hands to recover. Y/N just took her turn, affected by his choking. The two passed the joint back and forth until it was finished. 

“Can I talk to you about something? It’s kind of an annoying topic and I’d like you to stay calm,” she questioned him. “This sounds serious. I’ll try,” he replied with a huff. “I don’t know what to write to Cillian. I keep thinking about it and nothing sounds right. I know your reasons for disliking him. I don't even  know how to put this without it sounding weird,” she started softly. 

Severus just kept watching her waiting for the rest of it. “He was my friend. When I was in the village, I had no one else but him, at least in my mind. I had to write you off completely. I honestly thought I wouldn’t see you again. I was so fucking up in my own head. Telling the person who found me almost dead in a bathtub to fuck off feels.. Terrible,” she confessed. 

“You had me. You just chose to ignore me,” he said in a hurt voice. “It isn’t that simple. It was eating me alive,” she responded, trying to hold the tears back in her eyes. 

“It has now eaten me alive,” he remarked, looking away from her. “Right… I don’t know how to keep talking about this without you getting upset. I stopped eating after 3 days. I would get sick every time I tried. All I wanted to do was to drink and forget who I was. Looking forward to going to the pub at night with Cillian somehow got me through the day. I know you don’t want to hear any of this. I’m sorry. I just don’t know what to say to him,” she finally finished.