Suffering Part 2

Rather Difficult

The pair finally separated and made their way to the shower. “I’m sorry, I will need help washing myself,” she remarked as she started the water for them. “I know,” he replied, staring down at her. The two were an absolute mess. 

Y/N stood almost falling asleep as they waited on the water to get hot. “I’m very tired still,” she remarked as she leaned against the counter with her arms around herself. “I can tell. The water is ready,” he announced. 

The two stepped into the shower and Y/N did her best to keep her arm out of the water while Severus washed her body. “You are the best,” she remarked as he helped her.

“That’s what you told him,” he replied with an air of heartbreak. “Oh,” is all she said. He must have read her memories in her extremely exhausted state. “You are going to hurt your own feelings doing that,” she remarked as she looked up at him. 

“I apologize. I couldn’t be alone. I should have just told you to come home with me. Many regrettable things happened yesterday,” she responded as she went to exit the shower to let Severus finish.

 “If he had said yes,” Severus replied softly. “I like to think I would have stopped myself. I had clouded my own mind so much I’m not sure, honestly. I know that is terrible to say. Nothing good can come from delving too deeply into yesterday,” she remarked as she grabbed a towel to dry herself. 

Y/N walked to the sleeping area and laid on the bed, still in her towel. By the time Severus came into the bedroom, Y/N was completely asleep on the bed. He removed her towel and pulled the blankets over her. Severus climbed into the bed behind her, wrapping his body around her sleeping one. He kissed her head before falling asleep behind her soon after. 

The husband and wife slept deeply all night until the next morning when Severus went to retrieve their breakfast. 

Y/N was still a bit out of it as she sat for breakfast. She had quickly thrown on a t-shirt and pajama shorts.

 “I’m waiting for the onslaught of questions,” she remarked as they sat down to eat. “I’m trying not to hurt my own feelings, I suppose,” he remarked. 

“Will you wait to express these feelings until they come out as anger?” she questioned him. “You let him hold you, just like I do,” he replied with sadness.

 “Regrettable. I apologize. I can’t justify my actions in a way that will satisfy you. My original intention was to do something unforgivable so I could put us behind me. When I saw him, I just broke down. He rebandaged my arm and put me to bed. I asked him to lay with me so I wouldn’t be alone. Nothing sexual happened,” she offered the man looking back at him with a sigh. 

“You slept in his arms, knowing how he felt about you,” he replied coldly. “I don’t know how he feels about me. He wouldn’t say,” she remarked as if that would help.

 “You’re not as daft as you are pretending to be right now,” he said as he glared back at her. 

Y/N just closed her eyes, inhaling and exhaling. “I don’t know anything for a fact until he tells me. He and I obviously need to have some sort of conversation about my showing up at his door. I know you will never accept the friendship. I understand that,” she offered the man. 

“It isn’t a friendship at this point. That much is clear,” he spat back at her. “Whatever you need me to do to feel better about this, I will do. That’s all I can say to you, Severus. Everything that has happened between you and I has been awful. We are bringing other people into it now,” she replied softly, still looking at the visibly upset man.