Suffering Part 2

I Bet She Did Everything You Like

Content warning: talk of SA

The next morning after Y/N let the little silky boy outside, the two went to take a shower together before starting their day. “Is this the same bathtub little Severus used as a child?” she asked him cheekily as she got into the clawfoot tub with a wrap around shower curtain. Severus stared blankly at her before shaking his head, “Indeed it is,” he remarked. 

“I have never seen a picture of little Severus. You will have to find some,” she remarked as they started washing themselves. He thought for a moment before replying, “I haven’t seen any of you either,” he remarked. Y/N nodded her head, “Yes I guess I don’t have any. Someone else has them of course,” she said thoughtfully. 

“Someone else. Did you make a decision on that yet?” he asked curiously, moving behind her to help wash her hair. 

Y/N just looked to the bottom of the tub where the water was draining down the spout. It was mesmerizing how it swirled around. Her eyes focused on it, watching the water disappear, the tiny sound of it being sucked into the plumbing. Her mind was so clear suddenly. 

Her mind started racing to Cillian. Images were flashing behind her eyes like a movie screen. Cillian, sitting up in the bed as he removed his shirt. 

The fact she couldn’t move her arms or legs, just watched as if it wasn’t happening to her. It was someone else. This wasn’t her body, it didn’t feel like her. She could see his hands disappear onto her body. 

His face got closer to her, she could look into his clear blue eyes as he had the light from the bathroom shining onto his face. It was the kiss. She could feel him kissing her, the taste and pressure of his lips. She even felt his tongue slip into her mouth, but she couldn’t feel herself move at all. 

Suddenly, she was pulled back into her own body. Severus was trying to shake her to pull her out of it. She just stared blankly back at him. “I..” she started to say but couldn’t find the other words. Her eyes were anywhere but his. She blinked a few times, looking up at him, “Are you done with my hair?” she asked looking back down. 

“Did you see something?” he asked cautiously, knowing the truth already. Her entire chest was filled with intense anxiety. It felt like all of the air had been sucked from her lungs. She tried to snap herself out of it, “Are we done?” she asked looking back up at him. 

“You are done, I’ll be out in a minute. Are you ok?” he questioned her. “Yup,” she replied as she moved away from him, stepping out of the opening in the curtain. 

She got out grabbing her towel quickly, drying herself off in the most haphazard manner. She took the brush, dragging it through her hair as she tried to recount what she had just seen. Her mind had been pulled out of it, she needed to get back into it some how. 

It felt as if she were Alice jumping into the rabbit hole when it was happening. She reached down and turned on the sink faucet, watching the water swirl down the drain. Her eyes followed it, again and again. She focused on the tiny little sound of gurgling it was making. She watched it until the inside of her eyes turned black. 

The kiss, his lips on hers as his hand roamed down over her body. It roamed down over her clothing. He pulled from the kiss but it seemed like Cillian was getting impatient with the clothing. His hand moved down trying to pull her top off while her eyes just followed him. 

Again, her shoulders were being yanked. “Y/N, stop,” he ordered her in a demanding tone. She was pulled back looking at herself in the mirror with him behind her.