The Onion-Cutting Ninja's Secret Crush

141 Still Some Conscience Left

Turning back to Fan Mei, Si Qi gave faint smile, the gloom fading from his eyes for the moment. "You might be wondering why I am telling you all this. After all, what does it have to do with your brother?"

Fan Mei nodded. "That thought occurred. I sure hope you won't tell me now that my brother is on the receiving end of the unrequited love of the guy you're hopelessly in love with."

At that, Si Qi actually laughed. Si Shi Qi? The object of Si Yi's infatuation? That was so absurd, he had no idea what to do with the idea. "I'd rather believe he was in love with his boss." Yes, in the Si clan, there were actually few people he could imagine Si Yi being with any less than with Si Shi Qi. Maybe Si Er would be even more unlikely and Si San as well, probably, but other than them, Si Shi Qi was the one furthest up the list of people he'd never worry Si Yi might fall in love with.

Fan Mei smiled when she saw him laugh again. While she felt that this whole matter with her brother and that Si Jin and his assistant was suspicious as hell and had even been angry at Shi Ru Qiu for writing that article, seeing him talk about his unrequited love had still been tough. He seemed ... well, pitiful if she was to put it nicely. And that kind of pitiful expression was difficult to look at.

"So, if it's not that, then what is the reason? My brother and that Si Yi don't seem all that close. Or do you know something I don't?"

Si Qi shook his head. "No, it's precisely because they are working together." He smiled more brightly than before, actually cupping his cheek and looking relaxed for a moment. "It might sound strange when I say it like this but knowing how much I've loved Si Yi and for how long, you can't be surprised that I've always tried to stay close to him.

"He might not want me to but I still insist on trying. After all, he won't notice me if I'm far away, right? No, if I want to have even the faintest chance, then I can't allow any physical distance between us. That's what I've always thought.

"So for all these years, wherever Si Yi goes, I have followed. The things he takes interest in, I will try them out myself or at least read up on them so that if we meet, I will have something to talk to him about. As for the people he gets to know ... well, I'm not a stalker."

He smiled wryly and lowered his hand when he said this. "I'm not ... normally a stalker. I do realize that it sounds like I am where it concerns Si Yi." He cleared his throat, actually looking embarrassed. He knew that considering the whole Si clan was living in the same house, even if he wasn't deliberately trying to get close to Si Yi, he would still not be far enough away to miss out on any of these details. Saying it out loud though ... it made him sound rather deranged.

For a moment, he didn't know how to continue. Actually, had he really become that kind of person? Was he ... was he obsessed with Si Yi to the point where he had stopped behaving like a normal person? No wonder Si Yi wouldn't want to be with him.

He lowered his head, his eyes closing halfway. Maybe he had always thought too easy. He had figured that it was because of the Si clan or that he wasn't good enough but he hadn't taken into consideration that him trying so hard might be driving Si Yi away even further. Now, he felt even worse.

Si Qi completely closed his eyes and rubbed his forehead. Actually, what did it matter? Hadn't he already decided to give up and leave the Si clan? So why was he still thinking about this? He should just make true on those words and get it over with. Maybe he wouldn't even need to stay for much longer.

Anyway, he couldn't help much past this point. He had been a bit absentminded in the recent weeks so he wasn't as good at cooking as the others. He wouldn't make it far in 'Golden Spoon'. As soon as he was out, he could ask their master to let him go. Knowing him, he probably wouldn't disagree.