ᶠÚᵗᵇᵒˡ Oɴᴇsʜᴏᴛs ⎳⎳

Wrong Perspective pt.2

I was utterly wrong about everything, utterly wrong. I had doubted both Ney and Anto, but Anto was grateful enough to break down everything to me bit by bit. I couldn't help but to let my heart sink, because I know by what I had said, not only had I insulted Neymar, I had insulted his love for me which I was too blind to see.

It's been a week since Ney has taken a leave, and I cannot say I'm in my best state either. After I got to know everything, I practically died internally, and appeared dead externally. I continued to come to training regularly but everyone bawled their eyes at me as if they'd never seen me before, but I knew why they actually did.

I started to spend sleepless nights after the news, my children sometimes appearing in the living when I tried to get my mind off of it. They knew something was wrong, and I was set aback when they said it was something between me and Ney. I'm pretty sure Anto told them, because she doesn't have a zipper, I know her well.

I would love to apologize to Neymar for all that I had done, starting from physically pressuring him to insulting him, but he never appeared. The last I saw of him was that day, crying and mumbling 'I loved you' and limping away. There was no way I could stop him either, I was already more than devastated when he had given me a hint and a smack. I continued to doubt him until Anto told me, which left me shattered. More shattered to know that, I am the one who broke him.

I tried calling, texting, even visit him but all in vain. Anto couldn't help either, since she was preparing divorce papers. Yes, we're divorcing. I felt guilty, she's too innocent for this world, and an angel. But she insisted, saying she's not the one I love and that's true. We were never meant to be, but she's a lovely person, and anyone who'll be able to win her heart is even luckier. I can't believe how supportive she's being of everything, and it surprised me more when she told me she knew the sparks forming since the beginning.

Guilt ran me over completely, because of everything that was happening. Anto accepting us, me breaking Neymar, I'm devastated. I'm in a ravished state, and shaken. I love him, so much. It's too bad to believe but I love him too. I was just scared, scared to hurt Anto. I can't see myself hurting Anto either, it's wrong. I don't know what got into me and I insulted her alongside Neymar, even when all that I said was all a doubt. A doubt I was afraid is true, and I'm the old ferret being fooled here. But it was all just a doubt, and not reality. My suspicions led to the interlude which I could've avoided completely, only if I knew.

---

- "Anto, not again." Neymar groaned protesting against Antonella, who's striving for Neymar and Messi to hopefully re-unite.

- "Why not Neymar? Just forgive him, he didn't kn-"

- "....So what he didn't know? H-He ran my heart over with a bull-dozer as if all the days and nights I'd spent not sleeping and thinking about him, striving to love him, was all an act. But in reality, this all went down the d-drain.." Neymar isn't wrong, because it is true. Lionel had brought the interlude and it had ended in a bad note for the duo, which happened mostly because Lionel hadn't known and over-thought the whole situation.

Lionel wasn't in the wrong either. It's normal for the other to get concerned when your other half suddenly leaves, and it would irk you more than anything to know that he/she goes around with someone who you're close with. And that happens to be the case with Lionel, and the pieces are too scattered for Antonella to put together which is why either Lionel or Neymar has to be a man, and actually handle it maturedly.

It would be sensible if Neymar volunteered willingly, because Lionel had come to know about the situation way more lately than expected, and the interlude left him devastated and mentally dis-mantled, it's too much of a sudden change in life for him to handle.