Eternal || Elijah Mikaelson

LXIX - One Feeling

69... Heehee. *Double chin smirk*.

Pfffft. Don't you look at me with those judgy little eyes. I'm mature.

^ I said that to my friend's sister today. She thinks I'm crazy, I just know it. :')

This chapter was so sad that I got teary-eyed when I wrote it. But, nevertheless, I think you'll like it.

Enjoy! The song for this chapter is "Don't Let Me Go" by Raign.

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Chapter Sixty-Nine

I was putting the remainder of my clothing into my suitcase, when I heard a harsh and quick knock at my hotel room door.

I went to the door and opened it, not bothering to look into the peephole.

And there he was. Nik. His eyes widened ever so slightly, as if he was shocked that it was actually me on the other side of the door. Then his lips pursed, and I could see an unknown emotion in his eyes. It seemed to be a mixture of pity and disappointment in himself. Maybe a bit of sadness too.

What I had done to myself was a glorious feeling. Why the hell is he so upset now?

"We need to talk," he said, moving in and forcing me to move backwards as he quite literally forced himself in the room.

"Make it quick, Nik. I have places to go," I told him, smirking a little when I walked past him to continue packing.

"You need to turn your humanity back on," he told me.

I froze, turning back around to face him before I burst out laughing. "Are you kidding me?"

"No, I'm not."

"Oh, please. It'll happen to you too, Nik. You'll turn them off eventually. And it'll feel glorious. I can tell you that much," I smirked again. "The carelessness is wonderful. You can party, kill, sleep with whoever you want, and you don't give a damn about the consequences! It's like being drunk, but more fun."

He cocked a brow. "Well, it won't be happening any time soon, Jo."

"And why not?" I pouted. "Come on, Elijah's gone! Now no one is holding you back from your true nature," I grinned.

It wasn't until I said the words that I realized it. There was another pair of footsteps outside the door. As well as a distinct scent that I could recognize as easily as my own.

He moved into the room, shutting the door behind him. He turned to face me, his lips parted as if he wanted to say something, but couldn't find the words. He furrowed his brow a little, and unlike Klaus, he only seemed to pity me. Not disappointed.

And I felt it. My heart beat raced, and I could feel my skin begin to heat up. My grin vanished, and that was it. Every single feeling I had bottled up was let loose.

The one emotion that I felt at that time amidst them all, was the relief.

He was here. He wasn't dead. He was standing right in front of me.

I suddenly took the three short strides and closed the space between us, wrapping my arms around him as tightly as I could.

I could feel the tears of happiness rushing down my face as I began to realize that he was here with me. He was alive.

But then I felt every other emotion come over me, and I let him go.

I could see that they both were unsure of what to do when they saw the horrified expression on my face.

My eyes widened a little when I remembered.

"Th-The witches... I killed... M-Monique... A-And Abigail... I..." I put my hands on either side of my head, breathing erratically. "I killed them!"

Klaus rushed over to me, removing my hands from my head and putting his hands on my biceps. "Roseia, you can't feel guilty about that. My daughter would have died without you."

"I-I didn't mean to! I swear I didn't mean to do that! B-But I knew you wouldn't get there in time, and I just..." I shook my head as the tears continued to flow. "And I just killed them all. Please forgive me..."

Klaus let me go, and slowly moved away. He didn't know what to do. He looked over at Elijah, who nodded to him, and Nik looked back at me. "I can't forgive you, Rose, because there isn't anything to forgive. You did nothing wrong, you must realize that."

Nik left the room. He knew that if anyone could help me, it was Elijah.

Elijah moved over to me. He tilted my chin up so that he could look me in the eyes, wiping away the tears that fell.

"Hope would have died without you there. You did the right thing."

"Elijah, I killed two girls. I killed two children. Innocent or not, I murdered two children and I tore them apart," I said, swallowing. "I killed them!"

Elijah took a step towards me, and I jumped back.

"I killed them!" I repeated, tears beginning to fall down my face at a rapid pace as I sank to the floor.

He knelt down in front of me, watching me while I refused to look him in the eyes.

"Roseia, look at me."

"No... N-no," I whispered, the memories of every single person I killed coming back to me.

"I need you to look at me," he said.

When I didn't, he put his hands on either side of my face and slowly moved my head. He forced me to look him in the eyes, though I could barely see him through the tears.

"You must focus on one feeling. Just find one good feeling, Rose. I know you can."

I tried, and I couldn't. Nothing in my mind was good. It was all misery and shame and pain and suffering.

"I-I can't," I whispered. "Elijah I can't!"

"Yes, you can," he assured me. "You're strong, you can make it through this."

I whimpered again, shaking my head. "No... N-No, I can't..."

He made me look him in the eyes, and in that moment, I felt it.

Him. I could focus on him, and how much I cared for him. I could focus on how relieved I was that he was here with me. I could focus on the pain I felt when I thought he was gone, and the feeling I have now that makes me want to hold onto him and never let go.

"I need you, Rose," he whispered. "I need you more than anything in the world. And you must think of that, and only that."

My heartbeat almost skipped a beat, then slowed down. I was happy with him. I was calm. I was okay.

I was going to be okay.

I slowly began to calm down, my breathing slowing to a normal pace and the tears no longer falling.

When I was finally calm, I reached up and wrapped my arms around his neck, hugging him close to me. He seemed a little surprised, but then put his arms around my waist and held me close.

"Please don't leave me," I whispered.

"Never," he replied.

He held me tightly, and he comforted me. He helped me move on from whatever this was doing to me. I would think that it is safe to say that he saved me.

Elijah Mikaelson truly is my savior.