Double Dose (Part 9)

Spreading My Wing's

Have you ever wanted to do something so daring, so bold but fear holds you back? My entire life has revolved around the family and business. My every move was traced, watched and in the end my parent's made the decisions for me. Well except the time I ran off with Aiden but we seen how that turned out.

However this decision I'm about to make is far worse than me skipping town with Aiden. This is an entire country away separated by ocean. Seam is the Irish mob king not to mention a cop. This will surely make my family lose their breath. However i can't rid myself of this nagging feeling that's telling me to go, to see what awaits me in this new world with this mysterious man. Is it a new beginning or a end? There's only one way to find out and that's to take that leap.

For once I want to make my own calls and lead my own life. Of course I know what I'm giving up, my title in my family being the biggest but there is a chance that I'll lose them as well. However i can't live with regrets and wondering the rest of my life what if. I'm aware that I could be making a mistake and it could end disastrous but I'll cross that bridge when I get there. What hurts the most is deceiving my Pape once again. I know I promised him that I would keep him informed about my whereabouts concerning Seam but if I admitted to him that I was about to fly away to Ireland to be with the Irish mob boss slash cop he would use his power to prevent me from going and I can't allow that. I'm doing this for me. I need to dip my toes in the water of life and try something new, something different. This can't be all there is for me. I need change but mostly I need to put distance between Aiden and I.

I can't deny my feelings for Aiden. He is and will always be my love, my mirror. I can't explain it but my heart wants what it wants. This thing with Seam isn't love but maybe one day it will grow into it. I'm not asking Seam for a relationship or anything steady, I just want to see where it could possibly lead in time. Honestly I'm not even sure I could do a relationship right now because my heart belongs somewhere else. Yes, Aiden is married to my enemy with a child in the way but that can't even change my feelings for him. It's a battle being here and keeping myself from running to him. Ireland may do me more good than harm. Perhaps it will cure me of Aiden. Plus I want nothing more than to fly to Vegas and take Hazel out but I would never forgive myself if I harm a innocent baby that hasn't even been given the chance to live. As a woman who lost her own baby so unfairly I can understand why Aiden refuses to harm Hazel in her current condition. But best believe, once the child is born all bets are off. Hazel will not breath for long.

I still had a few hour's before I before I slipped off so I went to visit my G-pop. He always had a knack for putting thing's into perspective. I found him sitting at his kitchen table going over our latest financial report. Pulling up a chair I smiled over at him. "What are you up to Miz?"

Damn, it was like he was a mind reader. Shrugging my shoulders I replied. "Just wanted to see you".

" you okay? Is there trouble? You need money? "

Laughing I said. "No. Just want to talk to you, that's all.

Pushing his work aside he gave me his undivided attention. "Go ahead".

" how did you know that G-mama was the one? "

He smiled and I could see love flood his normally dark eye's. "I left her back in Alabama not long after we met. Like a fool I told myself it was just a going before I took over the business. Just so happens that two year's later she was still on my mind... Alot. Out of the blue she pops back into my life. Waltzes right into my business and demands me to sale her the land she wants." He paused as a endearing laugh erupted from him.

" She was just this small little thing but had an attitude as big as the sky. Didn't have a ounce of fear in her bones. Baby doll would match my glare with an even meaner glare. When I refused to give her what she wanted the crazy loon stood up on her tip toes and slammed a mean right hook into my jaw. I knew then that she would be mine but it wasn't easy. The night she saw the real me, the monster, she wouldn't even let me near her for day's. Never did I want the mischievous light to leave her eye's so I set her free... But she didn't go. ". Leaning back in his chair, he pointed to a certain area of the long viewing window.

" See that spot right there? That's where I was standing looking out across the city while my insides were falling apart. Then I felt her arm's wrap around my waist and that was the first time she said the word's I wanted to hear... My king. Yes, I didn't many stupid thing's along the way as did she but nothing in this world could make me hate her. No matter how bad she hurt me or I her,we couldn't not love each other. No one will every understand how I loved that amazing creature. She was my heart, body and soul.... And now, now my heart, body and soul is gone. Death can't come soon enough".

I reached for his hand and squeezed it. Giving me a soft smile, he stood up. "Come, let me show you something".

I followed him to the viewing window. Stopping in front of the glass, he pointed to a smudge. Upon closer inspection I saw that it was a hand print. "That's her print. The night it... The night of the attack she stood right here before we went out. She loved this view. I can remember it like it was yesterday" .

He stopped and placed his hand against her small print. In a voice laced with emotion he whispered. "She's still here with me... In everything I do".

His bottom lip begin to quiver and immediately I hugged him. Maybe I shouldn't have brought the subject up but then again he loved talking about her. "Let me tell you this Miz, love isn't easy. There will be fights maybe even betrayal but if you both love each other without a shadow of a doubt don't let it go. You've got to fight for it, make it work. Never give up on the other. Don't pass it up over something stupid or hold a grudge too long. In the end it is so worth it. I'd do it all over again including the hard time's just to hold her again" .

I stayed for awhile longer until I knew he was okay. Before I left I hugged his neck tight. "I love you the mostest".

He grinned. "And I you. But why do I get the feeling you're about to do something insanely crazy?"

" sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do G-pop".

"Just be careful and I am here".

Nodding I left and a hour later I was on that plane leaving a note behind for my parents. Hour's later I was in Ireland and making a call to Seam. "Well if it isn't a Harper". He answered with enjoyment.

" care to pick a girl up from the airport? " I shot back.

He roared with laughter. "You did it huh?"

" better hurry before I have second thoughts ".

" too late for that lucky charm. You are in my world now".

It wasn't long before he fetched me. As we walked off toward his car he surprised me by taking my hand possessively. I worried my bottom lip as I thought about how I would explain my illness to him and my stance on Aiden. However it turned out I could handle. Let the adventure begin.